I'm sick of waiting
I'm sick of falling,
I'm breaking
I'm tired,
but I can't sleep.

You're breaking me
while I'm falling for you.
I'm just waiting for you to notice,
the pain that you've put me through.

It gropes, rapes,
torments with film
footage, triggers shots
framed through a magnoscope

in dark recesses, strangles
with bare words wrapped
around each breath, laughs
as it seizes control. Cold

steel flashes, bores
holes until it bursts
and splatters all over,
taints restlessness

with glimpses, fleeting
walks through dreams,
eluding slumber
in circadian pursuit.

Jealousy. Control taken. This small parasite in my brain. With me, in every thought.
At night. Sleepless. Mind full of thoughts. Thoughts full of doubt.
He gnaws at me. Jealousy. Control taken.

Nothing left
Just empty words
I promised I would beat the curve

Don't know you
You don't know me
That's the life I aim to keep

Take a seat or take a walk
Anything but stand and gawk

Don't know me, that's what I said
Can't fathom what's all in this head

Dusk has broken
Sleepless nights
Nights filled with internal fights

Demons ain't the issue here
The issues me, I'm what I fear

Just like you, I don't know me
Stuck in a body that ain't me

Reflections lying to my face
Scared in life I won't keep pace

Another day to come,
A battle new,
within your head,
To rip u apart,
Get ready with your swords,
to slay the demons again!

You damaged my heart slightly that night,
little pokes here and there,
And my blood is calling out to me,
wanting to be released.
And my razors are sitting smiling at me,
because they know my demise and
they love towhat they're seeing.

but I won't give in, I'm not that weak.

You wrecked my emotions slightly that night,
and it's a emotion crash
in my heart body and mind
"Crime scene" tapes hanging all around
because my happiness was killed
and along with it my laughter died.
And my tears are crashing against the walls of my eyes
because they too know my demise.

but I won't give in, I will not cry.

You took my sleep slightly that night,
staring in the dark,
creating my own sky
It's beautiful and so was I.
And my insecurities are awake
they're by my side
trying to hold my hand
and mock me tonight.

but I won't give in, tonight I'll smile
even if it's fake, I will smile.

I have never really been into poetry,
Nor have I been into theater.
I was never interested in animated films,
Or movies in general
And music was just a hobby for me

Then I met you...

And now it seems as if,
I have found myself remembering you, by just listening to music,
And spending many nights, sleepless and lorn.

I'm patiently waiting for the next blockbuster hit
To appear in cinemas, so that I may ask you
For a single day together, once again.

Now my ambition is to create a cartoon,
Similar to that of Ghibli's, because you had me by a thread,
On that day we watched Spirited together.

I became the stage manager of a production,
Worked hard so I could make you say
That you were proud of me, but more than that was
To simply make you something beautiful.

And now all I can do
Is write poetry,
Every time,
I think of you.

Guess you dont see the full picture
Just think about yourself
Never someone else.
I cant ask you to understand
The pain in taking one last stand
No
Stopping was never a switch
A fuse to remove
Some wounds to re-sow
No
Stopping was missery.
Withdrawl rattled dreams shook me from my sleep.
No cure.
Days and weeks of work.
No sleep,
This could never work
I tried it all for you.
I worked harder then i ever have.
And now you think a relapse
Is all i ever am?
Next time i ask you to change your entire life
Dont blame me if its to hard
Dont blame me for the knife

I haven't been sleeping as easy as I usually do.