Come on skinny love just last the year
Pour a little salt we were never here
My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my
Staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer

I tell my love to wreck it all
Cut out all the ropes and let me fall
My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my
Right in the moment this order’s tall

I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
In the morning I’ll be with you
But it will be a different “kind”
I’ll be holding all the tickets
And you’ll be owning all the fines

Come on skinny love what happened here
Suckle on the hope in lite brassiere
My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my
Sullen load is full; so slow on the split

I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
Now all your love is wasted?
Then who the hell was I?
Now I’m breaking at the britches
And at the end of all your lines

Who will love you?
Who will fight?
Who will fall far behind?

she’s skinny
*
her waist is the size of the outside of her mirror

her stomach is empty

when she breaths in 
she sorta stays there

but she’s skinny

she’s skinny
she cuts 
more than she eats
but she’s skinny

she’s skinny
she pretends her birthday makeup will change

anything

but she’s skinny

she’s skinny

she can barley breathe**

*but she’s skinny

your unspoken words
sang our love, that my eyes have
slowly recorded.

And if I turn sideways
In the mirror
I look almost skinny enough
To be lovable

I can’t count the number of times I have read that little quote
Superimposed over black and white photos
Of those skinny girls
Sick girls
Stick-thin pictures of girls that my best friend tells me are impossible
Your words
Nothing
Tastes
As
Good
As
Skinny
Feels.
Oh no, my dear, nothing tastes as good as being whole
Feeling whole
Skinny doesn’t have a taste
But if I had to give it one, it would be
The taste you have in the back of your mouth when the alcohol’s washed down your throat
Sour and burning
Skinny tastes like it's pressing on my lungs
Skinny tastes like the inside of the mouth of someone who you know will never love you
I kissed ana long and hard in the dark but her bones
All
Snapped
When I pressed too hard.

Looking in my tainted mirror
Disgusted by what I see.
The fat protruding through my shirt,
Covering every inch of my vile body.
Hating my reflection,
I must get rid of the fat I see.

Calories I can't stand,
Cut them down,
Cut them out.
Lose the weight and maybe then
I'll finally be happy in my skin.

Workout, build up a sweat.
Don't eat,
Don't feel.
Work the weight off so you can see
Bones sticking out, the glorious wish.

Looking in my tainted mirror
Disgusted by what I see.
The fat protruding through my shirt,
Cutting out and counting down
The evil that enters my mouth.
I must get rid of the fat I see!

Hip bones protruding like jagged rocks at the bottom of a cliff.
Collarbones like the bones of a turkey carcass after thanksgiving dinner.
Ribs showing so much you could play them as you would a xylophone.
Wrists so thin they are likes apple cores.
"You should eat more" people have said.
What they didn't know is I ate like a starving animal that was given a years worth of food for the first time.
I stuff my face full of food hoping I will gain another pound.
Going to the doctors is just disappointment waiting to happen.
You go for a checkup and when they weigh you, you find out you weigh 106 pounds.
Last time you went you were a 105.
It's been 6 months if stuffing your face full of food for 1 pound.
Chocolate cakes, chips, and other foods that would usually make someone gain weight made me gain one pound.
I am now 120 pounds. It's been 1 and a half years.
You are proud.
You gained the weight.
Your hip bones like rocks at the bottom of a cliff when the tide is high,
Your collar bones like the thanksgiving turkey that isn't quite finished yet.
Your ribs are no longer an instrument.
Your wrists are the apple that only had a few bites taken.
You are happy.