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Jay M May 2019
Whilst the sun doth rise
Bird and beast awaken
From slumber
So profound
Canceling all else out

In the cavern
Walking into the tavern
I should have known

Awaiting me
Temptations
Sins I should not know
Never should I commit such a terror
Yet
For reasons I simply
Can no longer grasp
Such was completed

Swiftly
Quicker than a hare
I flee
Feeling it
Closing in
Making my skin ripple
Crawling uncontrollably

Walking up
The stairway to hell's door
Have it
I shouldn't
It won't hurt...

A quick sip
Pain rushing in
Regretting all in an instant
Never touching it again
No
I didn't even know me anymore

Close my weary eyes
Open again
Peace to chaos
Wondering what went wrong
Then realizing
Panic
It's all over now...

Toss it aside
Bring it back
Tear myself apart
Drag the pain across
Blood oozing
Punches
One after another
Thump, thump, thump
Please
I plee
To me
Let me go...

Uh-oh
Watch it all go
Mocking you
Talking to you
Shouting
Screaming
Run
You do
Only momentarily eased...

Nothing I can do
About these past regrets
But look back
Take the attack
Head on
Then submit
To the painful defeat

- Jay M
May 1st, 2019
Sarah Flynn Oct 2020
“it’s not always necessary
to be strong, but to feel strong.”
you said, quoting some author
I hadn’t heard of until then.

I wanted to tell you how
I loved it when you talked about
the books that you read,
how I loved hearing the passion
in your voice over something as
simple as a well-written paragraph.

I wanted to ask you how you always seemed able to live in the moment,
how the past never bothered you
and you always had faith
that the future would be beautiful,
and that somehow everything
works itself out in the end.

I wanted to say “I love you.”
I didn’t.

to this day, I don’t know what
stopped me. I tried to come up
with a reason, telling myself that
I was seeing someone else then,  
and it wasn’t a good time, and
I wasn’t sure if I loved you.

I told myself not to be impulsive
because we had the rest of
our lives to figure things out.

I see now how ******* stupid
those excuses were.

the man I was seeing then didn’t
care about me, and he didn’t
even try to act like he did.

and there’s no such thing as
a perfect time to say something
that you’re scared to say.

I remember how we stood on top
of this massive hill one summer,
and again, I found myself
wanting to say “I love you.”
and again, I didn’t.

the accident happened
a few months ago.
I just found out.

I’m sitting here, replaying
all of those moments in my head,
all of those conversations
where I didn’t tell you
what I wanted to say.

I should’ve screamed it from the
very top of that huge hill that day
so that you and I, and all
of the neighbors below us,
would know that I was sure of it.
they’d know that I meant it.
I did mean it, even if I didn’t
have the courage to say it.

my mind keeps taking me back
to that quote you said.

“it’s not always necessary
to be strong, but to feel strong.”

what if I am strong,
but sometimes
I don’t feel like it at all?
what does that mean?

I never got to say what I needed to say.
even though now, I’m the only one
who can hear it, I need to say it aloud.
I need to get these words onto paper
before they eat me alive from the inside out.

I love you
I love you
I love you
I love you

and I always have.
Sarah Flynn Oct 2020
I try to forget about
the things that I’ve done,
and sometimes I can

but when I get home,
I see that my bad decisions
are still stained into
my bedsheets.
Sasha Oct 2020
Sometimes I want what others have
Sometimes I dont
Sometimes I go the extra mile
Sometimes I wont

Sometimes I want what others had
Sometimes I dont
Sometimes I look at all thats good
Sometimes I wont

Sometimes I see life for what it is
So short and pointles
Sometimes I see life for what it is
So long and painful

Sometimes I know it's just a mood
Sometimes I wish that i just could
Sometimes I need to know what to want
Sometimes all of it is not enough
Ila Oct 2020
I hate having regrets-as anyone does, so I do my best to make sure I don’t have any. I can count the number of regrets I have on one hand. I’ve conditioned myself not to regret the things I have done and will do.

My biggest regret at the moment was that I told you it would be hard to love you.

I said it after things were revealed, but I had no idea the effect it would leave. I told you I used the wrong words-I really did use the wrong ones.

I claim to be good with words and yet I let those few escape my mouth.

It was so easy to love you. There are so many things to love about you. I loved you and all the parts you hated about yourself. I would’ve kissed the scars left from the past if I could. I immediately tried to take it back, I have no idea if it worked.

I was scared and confused but saying “I love you” 4 hours after suddenly made everything better. Everything was so clear at that moment.

Tears cloud my vision. I’m so sorry.
I love you; I’m sorry; things I can never tell you again.
Yana Kim Oct 2020
What if I said yes to him,
Would I still be single now?
What if I took the board exam,
Would I still be a loser now?
What if I never accepted this job,
Would I be successful now?
My life has uncertain future
But one thing is for sure
I am such a failure.
Gibberish truths
Cardboard-Jones Oct 2020
Truth under my breath
But nobody can hear the words.
I’m thinking out loud, what’s keeping me alive?
What’s keeping my mind occupied on Mars,
Fickle friends and fast cars?

I’m too nervous to
Stand in the room, waiting for the world to swoon.
I don’t see none of my regrets
And I don’t need anybody’s help.

A puppet on the string,
Control everything.

I don’t need any more regrets.
And I don’t see anybody’s help.
But I don’t see anybody else.
Just mute me.
Satvik gupta Oct 2020
Sometimes you fail in your life
then
the door shuts , the curtain falls ,  the wind freezes , the water stop altering in different containers . Everything just ends , a complete state of stillness , nothing but just you and your loneliness.
Suddenly,
Out of nowhere you start to realize about ,your mistakes , your deeds , your acts , etc etc. Everything clings your hands and u just want to vanish your existence from here but that too is unavailable for the moment . Nothing works , then , then u start hating yourself , your dilemma grows and screams in each and every cell of your body .  Negativity , Negativity , Negativity

Even though you try to stop this but your efforts become futile . You realize your nature , your feelings , your burns , your stitches , your despairs ,yours regrets , your failures , and what else not !
Flow of sand siezes in your hourglass , you are left alone , no-one is around except your new friend ,loneliness.

The last leaf of your plant welts like your dreary face . You fall apart ,you wither ,  your growth stops .  
But you know what ,  "Mistakes are like gravity , always keeps you down " but up to some extent after that it converts to "FAILURE"

We just need to realize that level  ,  but it ain't that easy my friend.

Sleeping with regrets daily ,
Even I will have a bright future ,
maybe .
Sufferings
Anais Vionet Oct 2020
It didn’t work out. sigh
What were the odds? Statistics...
- love isn’t baseball.

Where do regrets start?
Should I regret the sunset
- or mourn holding hands?

Or shame desire?
Baseball.. Well, at least he
didn't get to first base. =]
baseball where everything is a statistic - but everything isn't a clean statistic.
Something has changed about this bed I sleep in every night
It's not the same like the old days
Where I would sleep and smile in my dreams
Nowadays all I do is wake up
Scared that I don't have enough to live
Like my days are numbered and maybe I should say goodbye to family and friends
Pray that I meet them again in another world
A better world hopefully
That they would discern who I am
Even when the old skin will be clothing my body
That they still live their lives happily without me
That sometimes when they reminisce about me
It brings them great pride instead of tears
I'll meet up with those that left before I did
Speak about those I left behind about how blessed I was after meeting  each one of them
Miss them as I watch over them in their sleep
Miss how they made me feel loved
Miss their jokes and smiles
Miss the music I would sit down and write
To comfort my soul when I felt so alone
Miss the river that flowed in every vessel in my body
The river of great love and passion for those that were always in my sight
Before I do miss every fight and hug
I wanna say I love them.
Before the last time they set their eyes on me, it would be in a casket
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