Finally old enough
I spread my wings and leave
Walking, running, laughing
The world still beautiful
A gunshot echoes
The facade broken
A boy in a mask sprints
“Come on run!”
He shouts grabbing my arm
Adrenaline pumping I run
Excited
A new feeling I’m excited
So is he through
His smile shows in his eyes
We run until we get to an apartment
He leads me in a door
Panting he sits
“Vagabond, call me the Vagabond”
His voice small echoes through the room
I nod knowing that isn’t his name
“Dante”
I flinch
We’ve exchanged names now
Suit says I’m not supposed to do that
I’m supposed to say ‘Katherine’
“Inferi, I’ll call you Inferi”
His voice is crisp and sounds unused
I just nod in agreement
Now he is My Vagabond
And I’m still the little Inferi tagging behind
Still the small children we were in the beginning

Escaping memories I ran
To the setting of beginnings
In search of new encounters
A rescuer, an owner, a gentle

Word. Penn station had evolved
In years with my emotions,
Beguiling decadence lost
To opulence decay.

Pink granite covered in grime,
Glass filtering sunbeams had
Now turned light into grey,
Eerie shadows reflecting

My vanishing intentions,
Dwindling strength,
Waning hope.
The mellifluous cadence

Of alphanumeric flapping metals
That used to sooth me with dreams
Of arrivals and departures
Had been silenced for evermore.

Solari boards swapped
For liquid-crystal displays,
Even people had changed
Flaunting grimaces of disdain,

As they whispered rumours
Of terminal demolishment
To the benefit of a sporting arena
They would call The Garden.

I empathised with the unfluted
Columns of the Roman colonnade,
For I too had been deemed
Obsolete and inefficient,

A wreck no one shall retrieve,
To be suppressed, a panacea
For a collective consciousness
That would rather not see,

Turning blind eyes to me,
To cost-effective identity
Annihilation,
While Bobby freed of me

Won the New York State
Championship
At Poughkeepsie.

look up-
there's the ceiling
with its memories
of people passing
under and through
switching trains
exchanging hearts
if you close your eyes
you can hear the goodbyes
and the whistle of
the train as it puffs away
and beyond sight
there is so much beyond
sight and i'm running
up and down the stairs
here at grand central
station looking for
someone to hold my heart
maybe love was on the train
that just drove away
or maybe i'm just a little early
i check my watch
and the grandfather clock
dings.
i am not alone, i am with
a friend and so many strangers
and my friend looks at
me and says 'are you ready?'
i don't know if i am ready
i like being in a place of goodbyes
but she says to me that
goodbyes are only the start of
a hello and i guess she is right
but i can't help but think
if you were here with me
holding my hand
watching lovers part and
mothers cry
how wonderful it would be
to be the ones who have gained,
not lost-
watching others say goodbye
while we're just beginning
to say hello.

Is this a city?
             -It’s a city you see?
It’s just a place,
               -it’s a place to be.
Growing up here,
                   -was hard you know?
Comin’ from the streets,
                           -you know you’re in the know.
Ain’t nothin’ real here,
                           -unless it’s made from dough…
Realize your dreams,
                     -if you make ‘em so,

And I’ve been ready all these years; yeah I’m ready to go,
Now I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!

This is the city,
                 -it’s the place to be.
A place of dreams,
                 -a place of des-tin-y,
Growing up here,
                   -made me ready –complete,
Soul in the know,
                 -no I can’t be beat,
This is the city,
                 -and it was made for me.

My heart is on fire and I’m ready to go,
So now I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!

This is New York,
                    -this is the place to be,
It’s made of money baby,
                               -yeah it’s a fan-ta-sy!
Came from the ghetto,
                        -that’s no place to be,
Make your move, make your mark,
                                             -come on get on your feet!

My soul is filled with knowledge; laying down the flow,
My heart is on fire and now I’m ready to go,
Man I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!

Only way is up,
                   -ain’t another way to go,
New York is the place,
                          -for your soul to flow,
I’m laying down tracks,
                          -‘cause I’m ready to blow,

Soul is full of rhythm, so here I go,
My heart is on fire, I’m so ready you know,
Man I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!
The only way is up, ain’t another way to go,

I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!
I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!
I’m headed to the top of the Big Apple Show!

Baby I’m on top of the Big Apple Show…

I don’t know why I keep coming down here
Into the dark abyss of these tunnels.
It’s like something’s calling out to me
Guiding my feet without my permission
Like I’m just along for the ride.

Water drips down from the lower level of the 82nd street station—
Downtown B and C train.
I’m in a cave with dripping stalactites
But instead of awe and wonder
All I’m bracing myself for
Is absolute collapse.

The train roars in
Ba Dum Ba Dum Ba Dum
Slowly making its way to a stop
With a whine of its wheels locking into place
And a screech of the doors opening, protesting all the way.

I know I shouldn’t get inside
Should walk the twenty blocks
In sub-zero temperatures
Where at least the light will shine—
But something beckons me from the darkness.

As the train slowly begins to move
I see the red and blue lights waiting, watching, outside the window
The apparent heterochromia of the monster that lives and breathes and is these tunnels.

I’m suddenly sure that I’ll never return.

I never thought
one small girl
could hold my heart
and rip it in half...
but then again I am still her obedient servant

So strange,
That a window this small,
No bigger than my notebook,
Shows the vast sea of clouds,
Far above a rolling storm,
Lightning flashing beneath us
Like electric eels that live in the sky,
And endless galaxies beyond,
A little rocket ship,
Braving the horizon.
And as we descend,
Another smattering of lights appears,
Like a reflection of space on the surface of the earth,
And I know we’re here.