There are only so many things a person can ask themselves before,
Coming to the conclusions of self-awareness and arriving into the car the called adulthood.

And honestly, the only thing I felt was a need
In dire of change.
Im in need of self-evaluation.


6yrs is not a long time. but to me, it was a century too long.
I was like why did it take so long to realize this.
To start the process of following through with the steps in the right direction to begin the new path towards becoming the person I wanted to be.

I am exactly who I should have been.
Exactly what I thought I should be!
IF I hadn't gone through all these Terrible struggles
I would never have gotten to the point of self-awareness and the nagging need to change who I had become.

I am extremely proud to say Im happy to be me and be alive to acknowledge the I not happy continuing down the same road, I have been traveling the past 6 years.
One mistake does not mean I have stayed an addict, Im gonna stand up and gave myself a hand
Truly thankful to my lord and savior!  If not for him who has molded me, shape me into the woman I am today. I've gone through some horrible things that no  woman should have to deal with but if it wasn't for those experiences;
I tell you now I probably would not be the woman I am today but the strength I have now and the heart I have and the morals and values have I would not be who I am if it wasn't for all that ******* I had to go through.

Have discovered who I want to be and I have started a path 2 make sure that I get to where I need to be so that I can be so secure and be happy in my own skin living my own independent life and no one can be expected to do this without self-awareness and the ability to want to change the life Experiences in the dramatic drastic. obstacles I have faced.
I went down a self- destructive path, my downward spiral doesn't have to be the end of my story nope.
Cuz that is just the end of that chapter and Im closing one door and looking for the options of what other desirable doors
Are in front of me.

That's an inspiring story,
Hope you're ready to watch because Im going in head first

✿I wish i could go to another world✿
✿To start it all over again,✿
✿Without the same mistakes;✿
✿Without wasting half of my life✿
✿just by being sad and alone.✿
✿I want a new beginning.✿
✿Please give me a fresh page ✿
✿and a sparkly ink,✿
✿Let me begin again✿
✿I promise I'll do it right this time.✿

When the tides are low,
I find myself walking further out.

I feel hopeless,
nothing seems to make sense.

My guide has lost his map,
I feel stranded, blinded by every direction.

I could sit still all day thinking about what to do next,
but as I saw the tide quickly rise,
I didn't move.

My head damp with sorrow, and body numbing with pain, I let out a sigh.

The water brushed against my face,
and your hand pulled me up.

Gazing into your crystal brown eyes, you told me,
"I will never let you drown".

Suddenly she remembered
who she was and what she deserved
She remembered her dreams
To fly across the hills  
To touch the sky
and never let herself cry

As the flame arised
She set off, where her destiny lied
She wiped her tear
And made this clear
"Now whoever comes in my way
Should be simply slayed!"

The amber was converting into fire
Now no one could intrude her desire
So she set off
With a shield and a sword

At that instant the demons realized
That now she aggrandized
They did frightfully yell
Cause now she was strong as hell

After that
Nobody ever underestimated her love
Because they knew She was iron fist in a velvet glove!

-parthvi