ive been blinded by dreams that i wish would come true,
words that dont have actions
and lies that dont speak the truth
all i wanted was a me and a you
but all that i got, was pretending too

We live in a society full of insecurity
Red lips
Dark eyes
Fake tan.
Forced smiles
Closed eyes
Clenched fists,
Show no weakness
Show no mercy
Small hands on pale stomachs
Eyes constantly searching for ways to rid that extra pound
That extra curve
**** in
Deep breath
Back straight
Every calorie counts.
Is this really the world that we live in?
Is this the life that we wish to lead?
Our lives are no longer determined by the way that we think
They are not dedicated to achieving our dreams
To pursuing our goals
No
The way that we live is based upon the way that we look
And thus, the way that we are treated
We are always going to compare ourselves to another
That is a given
If we don't look good then we aren't happy
Right?
But for others to determine the fates of ourselves depending strictly upon a template of "perfection"?
Perfection is a disease
The very aspect of it plagues your mind
Inhabits your soul
And brings upon an individual an idea of something to achieve
That is nearly impossible to achieve
It is a roller coaster that only goes down
A concoction that only leads to inevitable heartache and pain
A poison that has no known cure
And it hurts
Perfection hurts.

I asked to love the reason
If my love was true, then
Why you betray me?
The answers comes that
It was not me, it was you
Who betray you,
Your expectations does that,...

If you are single do not stress it, mainly it's because you understand the complexity of the relationship recipe you're a child of destiny and a victim of intuition, morally gifted, respectfully lifted, GPS couldn't follow your mission, eagerly itching; but if they don't cut the standards you know how to dismiss 'em, If they're not sharp enough they have no place in your kitchen; not smart enough they don't deserve a compound sentence PERIOD

I, myself prohibit
myself to reveal our secret,
to say your full name,
or even write it when I write.
A prisoner of you I am,
Searching in the shadows the caverns of my agony.
When I invoke you when I am alone,
In the dark rock I touch your impassible company.

I cannot see my heart in anyone else's hands
but yours.
The fact that you hold on so tightly
whether you intend to or not
is still there every moment of every day.
Your attempts,

if that's what they are,


to         push      me      away,
areonlypullingmecloser.

I cannot let go of this rope I'm holding on to, this line between me and you.

If my hands set you free you'd no longer be cared for properly

and that's what I fear the most.

Gave a call.
Rang twice.
Mailbox full.
Gave another.
Rang five times.
Lady's voice.
Unavailable.
Shower time.
Maybe after?
Brooding.
Longing.
Wet.
Wrapped in towel.
Look at phone.
No missed calls.
Typical.
No surprise.
Forget the phone.
Forget the caller.
Return to life.

A little backnote confession
Silent but wanting it to be heard
I don't want to be a nobody
Or somebody unknown throughout his life
I want to to be remembered for centuries
Come drown these doubted words with me
I'll pay for the drink
Let's sooth the fire at the start
So it doesn't get awkward
I'm not better than Mozart or the guy you see it at the Subway restaurant
But I want to be someone who impacts the world
I want something about me to give warmth inside a woman's bones
Where she can't see herself with any other man
Because I'm an open folder that was opened on the wrong page
And I want you to know that my fears are your future problems
And I don't want that
I just want to be a man who is remembered forever
For the world and your world
Ahead of immortality, you're the most important
Making you happy is what removes the dirt from my skin
And cleanse itself instantly
You're the reason I'm not piling up on candy at a Dollar Tree
I just want you to feel independent and free
And satisfied with me
I want that chance for you to be happy
Because you're looking for a certain man
And I just want to fit that criteria

You asked for anything,
I gave you everything instead,

You asked for just a tissue,
I gave you my favourite hanky instead,

When I asked for anything,
You gave me nothing instead,

I gave you more than my infinity,
You gave me nothing more than lies instead.