It's funny how
When you're away
I miss you.
And that hurts.

I want to
Tell you more
About how I feel
Yet the words don't come forth.

I still hope that someday
We can meet, but sometimes
I feel as if that's just
Some sort of fantasy.

Yet somehow, I know in my heart
We'll be together, but is it just
Something I want or desire?
Or could it be something more?

You're a strong person, you know?
Just hearing everything you've been through
It makes me shake with anger
But at the same time, I'm hopeful for where you'll end up.

I love you, darling.
And sometimes I feel as if I can't convey that enough
In a simple message.
Am I doing something wrong?

I just can't wait until the day
We talk about stupid jokes and laugh
And then share kisses
Beginning to explore deeper places.

It's funny how whenever I write
One of these I wonder to myself:
"Will it reach her?"
It's funny because I already know the answer.

Whenever I'm down
Fighting back tears
Trying to hold on despite my fears
You're there in the distance.

Whenever I'm low
Sinking into the ground
You're there to pull me up
And tell me it's okay.

Whenever I'm panicking
You hold me in your arms
You shush me, and simply stay.
And I melt against your warmth.

I feel like whenever I open up
I release the floodgates; the depths of my mind
Yet you don't run away. You stay by my side.
And try to help me through it all.

Even though I'm shaking
Even though my tears seep into your shirt
You're there for me.
And I feel safe. I feel…something more.

You might not think you're cute
But I think you're beautiful.
And you might not think you're good enough
But I think you're perfect.

It's funny how in times of distress
We're there to help each other every time.
And even though we're crying and uncertain of the future
I'm sure that together, we can brave the oncoming storms.

Looking into your eyes
Makes my heart beat fast
And my breath hitch in my throat
I'm left speechless at the sight of you.

The words I meant to say
Don't come out quite right.
I stammer and stumble my words
Yet you giggle and say it's okay.

We looked at the stars together
And you pointed out a constellation or two
In that moment, our hands met
And you brought your lips to mine.

At times I feel nervous around you
And I'm unsure of what to say
But you're always there
To strike up a conversation anyway.

Your hugs are really warm.
And my heart is hammering out of my chest.
I find myself blush
When you call me that nickname I cherish

And I realize that I can't get enough of you.

I know it now more than ever,

you were always my forever.

People say I'm smart, and they're not wrong, 
I have good grades, I know the difference between right and wrong, and I have common sense, 
but I couldn't see that you were a wolf in sheep's clothing. 
That you can have your way with anyone, 
and yes I understand that I partook in what we had called real.
Oh, brown-eyed boy, you're just like the rest; full of yourself, thinking you're not like the rest, but it's all ******* lies.
Brown-eyed boy, can't you see you hurt me?
Don't you see the lie is building up into the tallest wall, one I can't break down or climb,
so I wait, patiently, but I cannot take your ******* anymore,
Brown-eyed boy, you don't see me as someone who has feelings, you see me as a past.
I see that you don't want to crush me under your foot, but now you have me in a choke hold.
It's a hold only you can take me out of if you would grow up.
I'm tired of gasping for air, tired of others giving me borrowed air that doesn't belong in my lungs, so brown-eyed boy why can't you turn your filter off?
You keep it on to 'protect' others when it only breaks down. 
You use it to bend the truth into a phrase that you think we want to hear, but that's what is making this a ******* war zone.
You are what's making everyone's eyes turn red and fill with smoke. 
You caused the hatred that people feel towards one another in our ring of insanity.
I don't understand why people think your new rose is the main problem.
Oh, how no one wants to blame the brown-eyed boy for the anger, the sadness, they can't see through your ******* mask.
But brown-eyed boy, you ****** up.
Brown-eyed boy, you let everyone who can see, see your mask fall off.
You buried the dead iris that lost your interest.
You stomped all over something that deserves more than the ******* lies coming out of your mouth.
Brown-eyed boy, you understand what it means to not be an *******, you know, you see, but you somehow can't.
You somehow can't own up to your actions, or your lies, or your mistakes.
Maybe, brown-eyed boy, it's because I was a mistake, and if that's the reason, then why did you let it go on?
Why did you try so hard to make it work if you never wanted to go on with me?
Brown-eyed boy, I don't want to lose you, but I can't take the fake screen you put up for me.
I don't care if you like the rose more, I don't care if you hated iris' in the first place; I don't ******* care if your brown eyes can only see red in this world.
I care that you left me wandering in the dark with your lies tieing me down.
Brown-eyed boy, you left a mess.
Brown-eyed boy, I don't know what the truth is with you anymore, or if I should believe you.
I don't understand why you haven't stopped the rumors.
I do not get why you take me as an amateur who will leave it alone because I won't, until looking at you, being with a rose, doesn't spark my curiosity, until I know for certain that you're not scissors, cutting down flowers when you have lost the joy with them.