With promises to spend our lives together,
Hand in hand we decided to walk
And share each smile, divide the pain
Oh my love, how horribly we have strayed

On separate paths we now walk,
Miles away from each other we are
I see you and yet we are far apart

I know I have hurt you
And seen the pain your eyes
oh how much it hurt me to know
That I was the reason

To right the wrongs I have done
To get back the love I have lost
I need to walk miles, but hon for you
I will

I remember the time in our youth
When we sang and danced together
And that lovely smile would grace you
Which made everything okay

I remember the days we'd walk around
The hills and the valleys, discovering us
With you close to me, the sun never ceased

I'd climb the tallest mountain and
Cross the harshest sea,
Just so you could be with me

I miss that, spending time with you
So busy with work we get that we forget
Living this life to its fullest

And now as I take my last breath,
I see all the times I spent with you
And what more could have been
Alas not in this lifetime.

I wish we could be happy again

You make me hate you.
Despise you.
All I want is for everything
To be over between us
Like you never existed.
Like WE never existed.

Your existence joined with
Mine is a crime.
I want to separate the two
Making sure they never
Join. Ever.

You've poisoned us,
Your thoughts have maligned me
Making me the bad guy.
But if walking away from you
Makes me one, I will be

I never wanted to hate you
Even when you were on
The path to destroy us
But I've had enough
Of all the name calling and
the baseless acquisition
The lack of trust

I want to wipe those
Memories.
The time we spent together
The laughter we shared

I want to **** the love
I had for you.
All that I did for you
Negated by the words you said

They say hatred is not
The opposite of love,
but indifference is
But the passionate the
Love is, the harsher the
Hate would be.

You've ignited a fire
Inside me, fire that won't
Be put out
You've made me hate you
And I'm glad about that

Imagine not having to
feel pain anymore,
imagine not having to
be afraid anymore
imagine not having to
live in fear anymore

Imagine making that
first cut, a slash
and your ruby red stain
that creamy skin

Imagine red rivulets flow
around you, small channels
creating art around you

Imagine your heart beat
faster than it ever has
trying to save your pathetic
life, the very liquid that saves you

Imagine being free
not having to conform
to not ever feel, move or see
ever again.

Imagine an eternal sleep
where everything is alright
your demons don't exist
no sign of your nightmares
a place where heartbreak
doesn't exist.

Just imagine.

Stand there and watch
Just do.
Stand and watch me
Break down
Watch me scream and shout
And not hear a thing

Stand and watch me
Claw at my skin till it gets red
Like a crazed being
Trying to find some solace

Stand and watch me
Run around in circles
Same path over and over again
Trying to make sense

Stand and watch me
Cry, like I never have
With tears of blood
Rolling down my eyes

Stand and watch me
Become a shell of myself
Someone I vowed I wouldn't be
Someone who I've come to despise

Stand and watch me
Destroy. Destruct. Anhiliate.
Myself

Just stand and watch.

3.00 am
Just before the sun rose
She doesnt remember if the sun set,even
Time was moving at the pace of clotted blood.
Hardly moving. Not moving.
She folded her hands behind her back.
Touched her indexes and stood.
She was stuck in the gilded cage
That her mind had spun.

She was free otherwise.
Rather, she felt a rush.
But there was something stopping her from moving an inch.
So she stood there.
Her cage. And her.

While the little droplets of sweat, and liquid dropped onto the back of her dress.
Small red flowers on a cream colour
What was done, was done
A lonely soul, in a dark night.
The big day was yet to come.
Choosing to bear the consequence
She stepped back into the crimson war zone
An organised chaos.
A sizzle. A splutter. A crack.
She sat next to her masterpiece.
A smooth stream had leaked.
'So much to clean up' she thought.
But nothing could match the high she was on now.

6am
The shop bell chimed
And she woke up,
The stream had covered her
Her visitor walked in and stared.
At the blur of human, red and knives.

'The buns are perfect Macy! '
'Are they? Well now I just need to fill them in with the jam.'

It was business as usual.

Shivering she sits painfully
in the corner,
hoping it's not time yet.

the room, her prison
the haven of broken dreams
and painful scars.

rocking herself back and forth
she hears the creak,
'he's coming', she thinks
and wishes for the nth time
that she were dead.

he drags her by the hair
painfully slamming into her
breathless.
she crumbles down
tearlessly

paying for something,
she doesn't deserve

Her cheeks, lost their rosiness
Eyes, their inquisitive shine
Arms colder than ice itself
Lips, a frigid blue.

Then came a knock, and he
enters, in his royal garb
Painting pink on her cheeks
And the sinful red on her lips
Dressing her in her best, for
The journey that will be remembered
By many. Forever

The mother screaming in pain,
the fathers sarcastic laugh,
the smell of petrol and burning skin.

The inferno is rising
"Run little one, run, live for
me”, and away she went.
Watched the inferno consume,
her mother and that man.

Buried under the ashes,
memories still fresh as ever.
A small house stands, where
her life ended.

A couple fighting and screaming,
a little child crying.
Will history repeat itself?
And leave another child orphaned?