Tonight, I feel lucky like I got Lamia at my side
Twilight will see justice and wrath meet
From virulence who could truly hide?
Tonight I ride in under the rain,
like under thin skin pushing blade
Anguish within replete in collecting like a memory
In time fully bleeding and reaping
A time limit on sun and moonlight
Tonight I ride in delivery
of thousands
hurting
for pain in payment

My mother was not right since the longest I recall
with the sickness to which you bound her, enthralled
For the daughters and the sons and for guardians who once
enjoyed their unity, who well beside themselves with grief
won't ever pray for harm

Tonight I ride lucky, Lamia,
as I collide

If living here is really so bad for you
then maybe you should just go
on a holiday, far away,
so you can see just how bad it is
how bad it is

But I, I believe, you'll feel the wind of home come invading through your window
wherever your heart takes you
And in return you'll come back after no end to pestering
I do believe you'll feel the wind of home

You know what sounds nicest?
In your bed lying covers half drawn.
Afternoon bath just as I'm waking up.
Your notes upon nightstands and mirrors.

I hope you understand that I'd do
unspeakable deeds and make deals to
realize this vision --

but I'm only human,
you lecher

I'm not the one distributing kisses
I'm not the one love has found you
in paper and ribbon
I'm a companion for us
lonely ones, called suckers
I'm a ******.

All that you know adjusts in moving so slightly closer to you
Did anyone think to mention I'd be falling so long before they pushed me?
If anyone dreams of the cell I'm stuck in I'd so love if you could wake me.
The walls rearrange, the halls rearrange
Message in a bottle:
You're in me

Black.
If it's the light you want it's in the pit of this
Nonsense lifted veil.
I'll be there.
Run a bit closer.

My stool is black again, I've been smoking
She said, "I thought that you quit"
I said, "I never meant-" cough "I never meant"
She said, "You said you could anytime, anytime"
But what's the worth of words spoken,
when you never meant, you never meant

To give the impression
you'd follow through
Only to sate the voice of reason in a poisonous
miasma of destructive and ambivalent
tendencies held too long and too deeply pressed

Uh oh
Cough, cough, cough, cough

. . .Cool.

I'll be going home without leaving
tonight,
inside
we all are wrapped in dust
as if
the love
we create in all our small spaces
cannot provide the instances of growth we need to feel whole
I beg
you, realize the end you wander to in time

Jessica went away with all the lurching other guys
just to wind up growing older in a slow roll, home well before midnight
every time he or she wonders what in wandering they would have found
depression in a sick head worries what with your shadow not around
might happen to me, to me

Living a life for all these selfish reasons
love, lust, blood as it must be passed on
wondering why we ever felt this way
sitting on logs watching the world go by
populace of sixty, two by two,
until done in their homes through the night
i'm dying if you're dead, I'll be flesh for the bones in your bed
beside, if we ever find

"Don't you want to talk?"
I said,
caught you whispering something
you'd rather waste your breath
reclusive screaming your spit at the world

Though in the future come we stand here breathing
looking in mirrors we don't know how we own
giving all our passion to day
light, away in exchange for the length we
once before jeered and despised

"I love you, but you're quiet,"  
I said
You'd rather be dead than alive
If I fell through earth to hear you
speak once more and stayed there
I doubt it would be a surprise