'dependancy' poems - Hello Poetry

adele horn Jan 2010

we share this space
we share this union
but i cannot be further away from you.
your faults make me cringe
your dependancy on praise exhausts me.
the narcissist is in you
feeds the bitterness in me.

i had hoped that you would come to take me away
and now i am sailing this boat alone.
i hate it when people ask
how i am.
cause i cant tell them,
the infinity of depair
you bring upon me.

they all bask in your glorious smile,
and your casual demeanor.
but they never see
the insecurity
the neediness
the demands
the dissapointments
the sulking
the depression
the anger
the violence
the fear i feel around you.

so i fight against a ghost,
lash out at the wind.
and i grow ever more lonely.
cause you are too stuck in your own pain,
to see me slipping away.

Raymond George Dias May 2017

A Metaphor.

Raymond George Dias May 2017

A Metaphor.

Imagine a warehouse of apples with their individual conciousness.
They are labelled and categorised.
They are segregated.
The apples are gathered and put into boxes marked
by what they want to be known by,
their commonality/mentality.
If a bushel of apples are a stigma, they are put into boxes marked by what the other apples tag them by.

In a self-marked box, by the name of “surat zayifa” an apple lays at the juncture of the pyramid of analogous red,
maggots eating away at it’s heart.
The apple turned crimson hued to an evangelist blood maroon. Smouldering; festering like an open wound.
A stinging aura besieged it,
suffocating the air like sharpnel stuck in the throat.
The apple, consumed by a dark resurgence and a devilish resolve,
spoke in tongues of the serpent and supplanted seeds of pestilence in the hearts of the apples who joined his brooding virtue.
A collective conciousness was supplanted among the fruit,
imprinted with the face of death.

The world of apples, thrive on each other and face the forebodings of life together in spite of their marked differences in a state of throbbing dependancy.
The apples feed on the apples.
Another self-marked box, by the name of “khalas” were set to consume the apples from “surat zayifa” to continue finity,
unwary of their poisoned souls.

The apples fed on the apples and almost every other apple rotted and perished.
The apples that survived were the ones who consumed the apples unblemished in spirit.
All the others apples from all the other boxes blamed “surat zayifa” as a whole.
Even the apples purest, were tainted by the sins of the other apples,
the ones to take the blame for the misdeed of their creed.
The box was now marked in disgrace, a vehemence, a scourge.

The last remaining poisoned apple that was set to perish from “khalas” did something morally unhinging before it’s spirit departed;
the apple smeared it’s tan blood with words on the cardboard and dropped dead.

The singular light bulb flickered, the pulse strained.
Everything fell silent.
The words read “ We are ourselves. We **** ourselves.”

This one goes out to those falsely persecuted in the name of religion and to those who give their religion a bad name and to the ones who suffer for the sins of their brothers.

#religion #world #virtue #life #metaphor #brotherhood #brothers #love #peace

Dan Shay Feb 2010

dependancy

Dan Shay Feb 2010

dependancy

I never walked out into the light
I was pulled out
and I've been being pulled out ever since

Mitch Nihilist Jul 2015

Emancipation Intoxication°

Mitch Nihilist Jul 2015

Emancipation Intoxication°

It’s a race to the bottom of the bottle
between sanity and sober realization
to every impaired negation and how to
alleviate and mediate the dependancy I
place on finding new routes to the
end of the flask. —
The hands of the bottle hold
dreaded burdens above my head,
bringing life to each morrowed breath,
and write hyms towards yearning
a long awaited wish for death,
sobriety weaves this addiction
of solitude through each thought of
halted life, and pushes it’s back
as it’s heels leave crevices to follow,
a view of darkness to come,
with turning back placing another knot
down a throat with attempt to swallow.
as each run of whiskey drips down the
walls of my throat the sinking ship within
my veins finds strength to stay afloat.
a Wiser whisper tickles at the anticipations
towards taking another sip,
the Hennessy tendencies stutter
a ****** equilibrium captivating
and inching my sanity towards
a shot of sequel librium. —
As ***** spews and consumes
the inhabited ground, a paroxysm
of unconsciousness feels
mentally sound,
blacked out with the following
morning full of acts to repent,
the monetary blackness
proves to be nothing but content,
recollection of priors
seem to fade with the desire of
sobriety and eliminating any hope
towards thoughtless propriety. —
Momentary happiness through
intoxication provides no mediation
between a sober fight for death
and a drunken one, the wish for
lifelessness is just subdued by
stumbling to bed and the inability
to steadily hold a gun to my head.

Steve Page May 2022

Solar

Steve Page May 2022

Solar

The sun is down
It's been down for a while
and while she hasn't said outright,
we think it might
be a power play
for a perceived lack of praise

The sun is down
We have been discussing
ways to raise her spirits
without out and out worship
(which would set
an unhelpful precedent)
And so we start with a song
A homage, thanking her
A call, asking her to rise and smile
And it only takes a child sacrifice
once, twice and thrice
to coax her back - a small price,
and before long she's her old delight
and we tell ourselves it's not worship
it's just the just payment due
based on the new tarrifs
for light and heat
and the cost of living
in this solar energy
over dependancy
greener economy

Not sure what this about. If you have any ideas, let me know, otherwise I'll chalk it up to whimsy.

#sun #energy #green

C A Nov 2012

Content With Lonliness

C A Nov 2012

Content With Lonliness

Here I am again
Content with loneliness
Writing riddles to keep track of time
Detaching myself from the reality of emotions
Pretending
Deep down I know love does not conquer all
I'm naive but I can keep a strait face
Too many arguments of nonsense and jealousy
So I keep everything at a distance
Such a wreck
In a tangled weave of misdirection
I panic at the thought of love
It's for children
It's for hope
It's for co dependancy
But not for me
I'm contenet with lonliness

Caroline Lee Jan 2016

Moon Boy

Caroline Lee Jan 2016

Moon Boy

Black nights and the sound of you through my bedroom wall
Sing about her so you can see past your own skin
Flaws and fault lines captivate and horrify so you pick apart what you can
Young man trying to balance civilization with the old magic you once felt in your heaven that soon after became my hell
But don't cry for them
In time we all change
In time we all rearrange our feelings and heartbreaks
We all figure out all role models fall
But it broke you
And down you fell into a sea of your own discontent
The winter of 2014
Quiet brilliance never one to avoid a fight
You kick and you scream where you should lie back
And I loved you for it
Millennial abomination that you are
Spit your voice and chase her off your chest
Drink away the excess feeling and burn the rest
Don't you know that what the fire leaves untouched isn't your load to carry
Leave her along the side of the road for someone else to burry and pick up your megaphone and preach your gospel of self reliance on the streets
Born of Walt Whitman you speak of dependancy like a curse
But I know you need the stage to breathe I know you weak shouldered boy better than you know yourself at times
Though I only know you through the wall of your bedroom
I've watched you fight demons and cowards alike
Watched you been bruised and forgotten for years
Disciple of your innocence you were ignorant to the faults of your fellow youths
Pinned them up like prize fighters on your walls
Don't you know I watched it all
And one by one they fell
Unfaithful, thankless wretches and they took the life from you while you washed their feet
And you swore off dependency and trust for years on years and let it all go
And now it comes out soft and sweet through my bedroom wall
Let down and hanging around you sing for every ******* that forced their way in to your chest
It's a wonder you survived the rest
But here we sit after all.

To my brother

#love #depression #lonely #saddness #family #brother

CD May 2015

Mother's Word

CD May 2015

Mother's Word

From the eager age of three, my mother taught me not to draw on myself, or I would get ink poisoning. Every time ink touched me, I'd wash it away with a warm cloth and some lingering worry. You wrote our initials on my ankle in deep blue pen, and I kept my left leg out of the bath for a week.
At the spritely age of eight, my mother made me promise never to talk to strangers. I kept my head down and my walls built high and I never said a peep to a stranger wrapped in shadow.
The first day I met you, I lay all my secrets down on that warm summer concrete and watched while you picked through them. (You didn't mind.)
Twelve years old, with a crooked, hopeful smile and my mother sat me down to talk about drugs. Those crazy, tempting things that will take away all your inhibitions and make you forget the very lessons that formed who you are. More addictive than anything you've ever had. They'll make you feel higher than the empire state building; without them, you'll go through a withdrawl worse than anything. A coexistent dependancy that will take over yourself. She reeled off a listen of words; Esctasy, LSD, ******, Crack. Somehow, she forgot to mention your name.

#love #heartbreak #sad #drugs #happy #mom #drug #joy #advice #addicition

Lindsey Nicole Isbell May 2015

Sometimes

Lindsey Nicole Isbell May 2015

Sometimes

I still have to wonder why
You somehow choose to stay by my side
Even when I gripe, groan, and complain
You help me find my way
I feel more at home with you than anywhere else
You're my best friend
No one else

I've created a dependancy to you
Without you I don't know what I would do
My life now revolves around you
This year has brought us so close
I wouldn't want anyone else

Still sometimes I wonder why
Why you choose to stay by my side
I'm nothing special; nothing grande
But still you choose to hold my hand

I'm so lucky to call you mine
You're far to wonderful for words to describe
You put the sun in my sky
You inspire the dreams of my mind
Sometimes I feel like a grain of sand
But somehow still you hold my hand

I love you for more than all that you are
You are the brightest shining star
I love you with all of my heart

<3

#love #star #small #sand #somehow #grande

Roxanne Pepin Oct 2010

Today is now.

Roxanne Pepin Oct 2010

Today is now.

Relief finally takes over
Breathe slowly
Think independently
Never let show that you need it
Addiction is lethal
Dependancy is over
No more time to think
About the inevitable end
As relief has taken over
You’ve relieved me of worries.

Kristie Townsend Sep 2016

LOVE CAUSES CONFUSION

Kristie Townsend Sep 2016

LOVE CAUSES CONFUSION

Love causes confusion, written by Kristie Townsend (09.04.07)
6 July 2012 at 00:15

LOVE CAUSES CONFUSION..........
I CAN'T SLEEP TONIGHT, BECAUSE YOUR NOT HERE YOU HAVE A HOME,
A LIFE OF YOUR OWN WITHOUT STRONG ARMS TO PULL ME NEAR
I FEEL ABANDONED & AFRAID, CONSUMED BY FEAR
"I'LL RETURN SOON, HONEST"
THATS WHAT YOU SAID YOU'D DO
"TRUST AND BELIEVE IN ME, BABE"
AND I HALF-HEARTEDLY TRIED, HONEST, ITS TRUE!
MY SENSES STIR AND MY SOUL AWAKENS
EVERYTIME YOU WALK IN THE ROOM
MY DEFENCES ARE DOWN, MY FOUNDATIONS SHAKEN
AS I BEG YOU "PLEASE, COME TO ME SOON"
A PHYSICAL PAIN, THAT IS WHAT I FEEL
WHEN YOU ARE NO LONGER HERE
MY ADDICTION AND DEPENDANCY ARE REAL
"OUR LOVE" BEING JEPODISED BY "MY FEAR"
"OLD DESTRUCTIVE HABITS DIE HARD" SAY THE CONSTANT VOICES IN MY HEAD
THEY LEAVE MY EMOTIONS, MY HEART SCARRED & LONELINESS IS ALLEVIATED BY ANALYSING ALL THAT YOU SAID.
I TRUELY HAVE NEVER GIVEN MYSELF TO ANOTHER, AS I DO TO YOU SOUL MATES, BEST FRIENDS, LOVERS
I REALLY WANT TO SEE THIS THROUGH
I BELIEVE THAT YOU DESERVE BETTER,
I CAN NEVER BE ENOUGH FOR YOU
I WOULD WRITE YOU A "DEAR JOHN" LETTER
BUT I CANNOT, FOR IT SIMPLY WOULD NOT BE TRUE
I AM A FOUNTAIN OF SOPPY SENTIMENT
WHEN I THINK OF OR SEE YOU
PREVIOUSLY FULL OF RESENTMENT
NOW I'M FILLED WITH SELF DOUBT & WHO YOU MAY *****!
I HOPE THAT YOU ARE A BIG BRAVE LION
COS I'M SCARED ENOUGH FOR TWO
I PRAY YOU'RE MADE OF STRONGER STUFF THAN I AM
FOR I FEEL WEAK, HELPLESS & ALL ASKEW
THE CONFLICTING SWIRL OF EMOTIONS
I HAVE DEEP WITHIN MY CORE
ARE MOST LIKELY TO CAUSE A COMMOTION
IF I SHOULD DARE TO DREAM OF MORE
I PRAY DAILY THAT WE STAY TOGETHER
IF NOT FOR A YEAR OR MORE
HOWEVER MY CYNICISM KNOWS BETTER
MY PREVIOUS EXPERIENCES PREDICT THE FINAL SCORE
I MEAN IT WHEN I TELL YOU THIS,
FOR WORDS ARE ALL THAT I HAVE,
YOU GET THE JIST?
I THINK THAT I'M FALLING IN LUST WITH YOU
AND NO I'M NOT *******!
I THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU HAVE GIVEN ME
WHICH IS A LOT, MORE THAN I KNOW
I LOVE, HONOUR, RESPECT & CHERISH YOU
WELL AT LEAST UNTIL THE DAY YOU GO!

#kristie

— The End —