I could stare at you forever,
Your hair,
Your lips,
Your eyes,
Your style,
Your beauty,
Your everything,
And you're everything to me.

perfection is overrated
should be outdated
A misconception that
leads in the wrong direction
A selection  of  delusions
based on opinions
A reflection of a society
full of illusions
A collection of deception
that leads to self destruction
A thought that should be
rejected instead accepted

I have tasted darkness,
and oh how bitter-sweet it was on my tongue.
It electrified my taste buds
and sent my body numb.
I had never felt a rush vibrate my bones
from the eruption of tears
escaping from eye to cheek.
what an odd sensation
to smile for being weak.
i'm victim to my demons
and their persuasive way of speech.
hanging by my fingertips,
fascinated by how they bleed.
one slight movement and my spirit will soar.
tempting to not only try,
but succeed the evil deed.

why do we pretend
pretend we are not broken
hurt by the words spoken
why do we pretend
is the pain too much to comprehend
are we afraid of being vulnerable
being so open ,defenseless
is it the fear of being hurt like the countless times before
why do we pretend

Sometimes when I'm all alone,
I listen to my favourite song,
I close my eyes,
I get lost inside,
Inside my mind,
Inside my fantasies,
Inside my dreams.

I feel safe there,
It's my safe place.

In my safe place,
I find hope,
I restore my energy,
I patch my all so broken heart,
I find peace,
I smile,
I'm happy,
I'm myself...

Then reality kicks in,
Troubles,
Stress and worries,
Toxic people and environments,
Hopelessness,
Loss of faith,
Discouragment,
Sadness,
Hatred and guilt.

Guilt of everything I want to do,
But never do.
Everything I feel,
But never show.
Everything I dream for,
But never reach for.
Everything that's me,
That I suppress.
Everything I like,
That I replace.

All that I am,
Is living a lie,
Trying to get by,
Like everyone else,
Just to survive,
But never to live,
Because I'm afraid,
Of the thrill.

But more than all,
I am afraid of you,
Your judgement,
And your hatred.
You scare me more than a life not mine.
You scare me so much my life is yours.

That's the saddest part,
All my life I have been wanting to break out of my shell,
And all my life you are the one who keeps me inside it.
I let you control me,
When I should be controlling myself.
I let you decide my destiny,
Because I'm afraid to fight back.
You are my biggest fear of them all.
It's you I hate and you I have to impress.

I want to break free and just be me.
See what I can be,
Control my own destiny.
I'm lost within my own chains,
In my own selfmade prison,
I let you imprison me,
Because I'm too afraid to try.
Someone set me free,
Someone show me how.

What is my life worth if it's not lived?
What is my life worth if my soul's already dead?
What is my life worth if it's not owned by me?
What is my life worth when I don't let myself be free?

I need to set myself free.
Help me set myself free.