depression is something that will go away.
sooner or later, but it will leave you.

two and a half years ago, i was so depressed that i couldn't get up anymore. literally. for eight weeks.

and now i'm satisfied with myself. because I simply accepted my longing.

that's it.

have you ever heard somebody saying: "teenagers today are ruder, more violent and so much hornier than we were."

i don't think so. it's not like that. most grown-ups have forgotten over the years what they did and how they acted out.

we surely have a lot of vivid memories about our youth. but our feelings of teenage experience disappeared.

history repeats itself.

monday next week would
have been my last day
inside the rehab

today i was told by another patient
that he has nothing to lose
anymore

he confessed to me what he
might do very soon

it was horrifying!

i will not write about it

therefore I am going to
leave here today
in the evening i'll be
meeting good-hearted people
who believe in a
power much bigger than
all of us

a good man does the right thing
that's why i want the good in my life

may god bless us all.

family:
nothing worth more

i am listening to my
people's words

i am listening

i am
i will be

ten minutes ago
i was talking to a woman
whose background i'm
aware of

this woman was pretty and she looked
at me with ****** interest

however: i moved my left arm in
a way that is related to my background as
a fatherless boy

rejection in her eyes the consequence

BUT:

i will never stop to move my arms as i learned moving them
–– precisely this way –– in my childhood

nobody –– male female animal or object –– is able to change this:
i do not need anybody trying.

feel me. that's how i am.

self-acceptance. self-love. courage.

Here we lay flowers
where we bury our loved ones,
close our eyes in prayer.

If heaven is Up,
The night sky so full of stars,
I will awe instead.

Wonder which one shines,
how bright the life that was you,
A floating lantern

With a lotus flame,
Lift up in memory of
Love, Amaranthine.

By Jennifersoter Ezewi

Give it a chance in Africa:
For the dawn knows the blossoming grain.

Give it a chance in Africa:
For the moon brightens uninvited.

Give it a chance in Africa:
For the mother earth smiles on you.

Give it a chance in Africa:
And support the effort of every child.

Give it a chance in Africa:
And listen to that child when he is making sense.