You left me without remorse and hesitation.
I stayed in exhaustion in bedding of ice.
I see your ghostly outlines.
You are like polar ice cap in distant horizon.
I can not stand insulation.
I reached irreversible aspects of survival.
Little heat of my body has left.
My whole body embraces the numbness to the core of bones.
Dark hallicunations penetrate my mind.
You left me without remorse and hesitation.
Maybe unconsciousness will rescue me from pain.
My heart will stop functioning soon.
I wish I could do something to save myself.
I need anesthetic of your kisses,
your sweet morphine of saliva.
I barely close my eyes to sleep.
I tremble and search for answers
why you left me,
why God allows for loud cry,
why destiny walks dark paths.
Will mountain of ice in you crumble?
You left me without remorse and hesitation.
Nothing makes sense.
Haviness is growing inside of me.
I try to speak with flames of grief.
I try to play with them
but soon I will stop breathing.
Inaudible lullaby lulls me to sleep.
You are my attacker now, my conspirator.
Obviously you feel innocent and blame me
for sinfulness which I carry with me,
for lies that were not spoken.
You left me without remorse and hesitation.
I am waiting here in pain for your endorsement.
I vowed to be with you forever.
Promises fade away in the cold
from lack of heartbeat and breathing
as I now died here for you.
After this initial death may come
second and third death
until I wake up with you
staring into the ocean of your eyes
like a shore waiting for waves.
You left me without remorse and hesitation.
Without you all parts of my body screams in pain.
I am churned sea wishing calmness,
lost molasse on your journey through world,
underwater sounds not heared by anyone.
My thoughts are inquisitive for your words not said.
I am kneeling in beseeching prayers.
Maybe this will save us from disdain and sorrow.
My confusion is mixed with panic attacks
that I will never kiss your eyes again,
that love floated like frightened bird,
that world would die with my dreams.