We are problem-solving machines, so naturally, in the absence of real problems, we cannot help but create our own problems. Perhaps we will never be free of problems, whether real or imaginary.
No love is ever lost no matter how wasted it may feel. The love will return to you in time, through healing, in all sorts of ways. Love cannot be measured- it cannot be lost nor expended. Love surrounds us every day in all of its abundance and awe. Love is a miracle that will always pull us through over and over again. So never regret the love you give to anyone, it will always return in its abundance for you to share again and thus the cycle of love continues.
Oh, the memories we will share forever. The unforgettable tales we will tell of our love and anarchy. Our finite time made for infinite stories and we shall share them for the rest of our lives.
Winter is hard when you have so much love and you are not here to receive it. Nothing illuminates the darkness, nothing warms the coldness and nothing thaws the ice from this heart when you are not here as my sun.
When was the last time I felt like myself? Maybe when I was young all those years ago. But those memories are as distant to the present as I am to myself now.
Grief is inevitable. Everyone will pass- they will turn to memories and all you can do to prepare is make sure you made an abundance of them for that inevitable day.
I live through moments I know will be nostalgic as they are happening. There are some moments where instead of enjoying them, I am already sad that they will end, never to experience again. Glee and gloom at the same time- nostalgia forms before the moment has even passed.
You wove magic with tenderness and love that you braided in my skin and made the sunflowers sing with your laughter alone. I painted your beauty into those very sunflowers that I maintain to this day. I plucked the brightest one I could find and keep it on my bedside table. That way it reminds me of you from the moment I wake to the moment I sleep. I think I'm going to plant some more sunflowers in hopes that their presence will embrace my home the way your warmth embraced my home so very long ago.
To this day, it still saddens me that our only photo was upon the London Bridge. Don't get me wrong, it's a spectacular shot but it doesn't give justice to what we were or what would have been.
Why do we write? Is it to fill the bottomless hole in our hearts dug by those who come and go, who defile and destroy, and those who do not understand your heart?
It still warms my soul that you haven't forgotten me, hell, you still think about me. I poured all my love into your cup and you have not spilt it and turned away like so many before.
Somewhere down the line you lost yourself. Was I to blame? I'm not sure, but I did ignore the signs and that's on me. Both of us thought you would never get lost and now I just want to bring back who you once were.
As you walk alone, make sure to grow lovely little things along the way. Grow your pretty pathway, your graceful garden, and maybe one day you will get to share it with someone just as lovely.
I am a storm- a trail of destruction that follows me each day. I am the thunder, the pain and paranoia that goes boom in the night. I am the black clouds- I am my own black hole and this anger cannot escape.
It is time to accept that you are not coming back. It is for the best- I would not accept you. What betrays me once will surely betray me twice and as many times as it needs to.
Why do I wake up? It was always you. Knowing that I share the same moon that kisses your smooth and pale cheeks is all the reason I need to get out of bed each day. And knowing that you bless my dreams each night is all the reason I need to rest my weary soul. It was always you.
October, the month of blossoms and hopeful horizons. Perhaps this hibernating heart can come out again and bask in the new sun- perhaps it will thaw out one last time.
Dear diary; Tonight, I will once again return to the shadows, to hollowness and emptiness, to nothingness. Oh, the joy of losing myself in the darkness of space and time, the joy of being no one and nothing for another night.
It was with you where I found the courage to leave this world, to branch out into the unknown. And so you took my hand and we blasted off into the cosmos and found countless worlds and wonder. In them, I found you, I found a home, and I never looked back.
Waking up in Memphis one last time and I am sad to say goodbye. She's driving me to the bus depot thinking about how she'll spend the rest of her day. Meanwhile, I'm thinking of how I can stay just a little bit longer.