But good God, I'm restless!
I can't even sleep...
In day I have been terribly tired and haunted by a lassitude,
Lashed in place by listlessness,
And now that the stars have come,
And the moon has crossed overhead,
I couldn't sleep if I wanted to.
Angst! Malaise!
Like a ghoul,
Haunting me
The same as the lassitude which should have preempted it-
The sleepless night crawls up and down my arms
Like a lover's touch when you've already said,
"Dear, not tonight."
I love the night but
Sleep, come take me into your embrace.
Let me join the soft waves of the semiconscious sea
And dream--
I lie, eyes wide in the dark
Staring down a screen which soaks up my words like a sponge..
Full yet? I hope not, for I must dribble out more.
Dabbing paint in loud colors on a dark canvas×
• •• •• • ~
I lay in bed pretending.
My feet at the pillows,
My head at the foot;
Perhaps there are times this energy is welcome,
And I'd treat it as a gift,
And that's probably usual but
tonight--
Tonight it is ennui.
Tonight it is a disoccupation,
An unoccupation,
And it makes me squirm~~