i did not
throw anything away

it was you
who threw me out

and i simply remained
where you left me

adapt
like a bird
building a nest
out of discarded newspaper

a small animal's bones
restructuring
readjusting
around the plastic rings
that once held soda cans

learn to stay put
if you were meant to fly
but find yourself
caged

adapt
change your body chemistry
alter your consciousness
to fit in
where you were not made to

its always there

sometimes
i get so happy
that i find myself
sad
again

how is it
that two things
that are so different
are so connected?

stop hiding behind my eyelids
let me sleep

i saw you in a photograph
smiling like someone trying to be happy
i am not sorry for you

no new notifications

sometimes
in the midst
of a power struggle
i miss him

when my head
and my heart
do not feel my
consciousness
bleed for him