I started going to counseling this week
because my plants started dying

the roots are all rotted
and the leaves are just slowly eating away at themselves

maybe my roots are rotten too
and I need to fix them before I start eating myself up

intoxicated
from the soft touch
of your lips

infatuated
from the way your hands
intertwine perfectly with mine

hypnotized
by the smell of musty cologne
that your clothes drown in

how sad, that your memory

is my addiction

curled wrists folded within crumpled sheets
heartbeats gently flutter beneath my skin
drunk on dreams as I nestle
further and deeper into oblivion
however my mind is choking
mental reminders of things past
objectives to complete
work to be finished
I, bleary eyed, weary *****
assume a vacant mind
fixed to a beat body
mess of movements, mess of thoughts
3am is so unkind
to a lonely longing mind

maybe you love her
even when you say you don’t
and maybe you miss her
in every way when you’re alone
but tell me why
when you hold me close,
for a second, i believe
you love me the most.

i crave it,
i endlessly fantasize,
but im a hypocrite,
my heart would abscise.

don’t say those three words,
don’t tell me.
im too afraid,
it’s just a hyperbole.