If the red slayer think he slays,
Or if the slain think he is slain,
They know not well the subtle ways
I keep, and pass, and turn again.
Far or forgot to me is near,  
Shadow and sunlight are the same,
The vanished gods to me appear,
And one to me are shame and fame.

They reckon ill who leave me out;
When me they fly, I am the wings;
I am the doubter and the doubt,
And I the hymn the Brahmin sings.

The strong gods pine for my abode,
And pine in vain the sacred Seven;
But thou, meek lover of the good!
Find me, and turn thy back on heaven.

It never ceases to amaze me how enamored I am by the moon.
There's some sort of energetic mystical connection to my soul.
The way it  illuminates the darkness. It's mere poetic existence. It's breath taking.

It reminds me of who I am.
It whispers to me through the shadows.

As are the phases of life, the moon tells a similar story.

Unable to show the world her true potential. For even on the fullest of nights, when she's shining in all her magnificent glory, there still remains a darkness unseen. Unexplored. To that of which no man may ever see. The dark side that she keeps locked away.

She lets the sun dictate her beauty. She knows it's always there, but she won't shine without his light giving her courage to be seen.
And even then, with all his radiating love exposing her magnificence, she still conceals her darkness. It's her mystery. Always there hiding behind her entrancing allure.

Her mere existence makes waves. She can cloak herself in darkness yet the tide still pulls, longing to reach her. Desperate to get closer.

She's never whole for long. Her courage seems to dissipate soon after he leaves. Completeness is soon replaced with an empty sky. For in an ever changing universe there must always be highs and lows. Phases of life entrapped in a never ending cycle.

You may not always feel whole, but there's someone out there that still loves you when you're shrouded in darkness, that will seek you out when you're incomplete. For even a crescent is beautiful when you know what the shadows conceal.

(from 2012)*


A chance reveals itself before me,
Happenstance too good to pass-
I take this to the street, I’m changing how I see.

My heart races, my heartbeat fast begins to flee
My world becomes vast
In a waterless sea

I see the movement in every tree
As I float on a greener grass
Compelled by my knees to take me where I see

I follow the calling, only a body
A nail guided by magnets moving as mass
I’m no longer confined by reality

A world crafted by an artisan in geometry,
To think every star that meets my eye greets me from the past
And we are living trapped and pointlessly.

The sun peers over the horizon at me,
Light warms my world fast
But warmer are my thoughts, the chance that found me
Moved my world and set it free.

I’d never met Mr. Campbell
Or heard of Mr. Stone,
But now I’ve ceased to ramble,
They’ve provided me a home.
A place for old and older,
Not poor or broke nor rich.
For meek and mild and bolder,
It runs without a hitch.

A bus to take us shopping
Or cruising to the mall,
And even island hopping
There’s something for us all.
Pat Pepper keeps us busy,
Not anchored to a chair
Al Widener’s in a tizzy
If we’re not happy there.

The staff is neat and clever
At Bradshaw’s restaurant
I plan to stay forever,
‘Cause it’s my favorite haunt.
No need to roam or gamble
For we are not alone,
God bless you Mr. Campbell
God keep you Mr. Stone

The static ringing in my ears,
Reminding me that I wasn't torn apart,
Like an animal, I ravaged my own heart,
Torn it to bits like a lion with it's prey,
Divide up the remnants,
And cast them into the wind....
Hoping to feed the other hungry hearts like mine,
But the pieces were left to rot.

In a relationship
I'm not equipped
I'm too empathic,
The change is drastic
When in a union
I become a chameleon
I adapt
Till I'm trapped
I give to live
Until I find
My mind
Is gone again
I push away
My love it strays
In a daze
Stumbling
Fumbling
We're done
I run
To find clarity
My identity
Alone
At home
I yearn
To learn
Solidarity
Sincerity
For me
To be
Able to see
Entirely
My identity
As a singular
Entity
You see
It's not you
It's me
That needs
Protection
From your affection
That I lose
When I choose
Not to mingle
I need to be
Single

It's not the memories that hurt.
I seldom find myself lost amongst those painful reveries.
No, it's much deeper than that.

It's not logical or tangible.
It's an inexplicable feeling,
Or lack there of.
A void.
Deeper than conscious thought.

It's molecular.
As if the atoms that create my existence mourn your presence.
Perhaps they grew fond of the way our forms were intertwined.
Vibrating in unison to an unheard melody.
They moved together in harmony.
They united for a time only to be torn apart by shallow egos and petty differences.

That's where the perpetual longing originates from.
They grieve your absence with an incessant hum that whispers your name throughout my body. Pleading with me to fix this.

Sigh.
Sounds better than admitting I actually miss the *******.
It's not me, I swear, it's my ******* atoms! Do I look like a physicist to you!? I don't know how to reinvent the atom!!

You're an anomaly
He said to me
A little crazy
But to Mr. Swayze
You're like the wind
Always travelin'
In different directions
I think his intentions
Implied a compliment
But it felt like cement
As it brought me down
Because I've found
That to be unique
You'll face critique
In a world that conforms
You'll surely adorn
A kind of pariah
As you start to acquire
The loneliness
Becoming depressed
By the need to connect
When they're all inept
To the concept
Of your strange perception.