You whisper ''i love you´´

with such conviction and passion,

no hesitation

mouth gusty in flowers.



I

Love

You



Every word said sincerely,

all the sounds said heavily,

so heavily,

that I could almost grab them in the air.



Real.



(real is so frightening)



True.



(all my ugliness would reveal itself)



''I love you, too´´



Such a selfish sentence,

weak in conviction and passion,

impregnated with hesitation,

mouth full of thorns.



I

Love

You

Too



If only my words were as pure as yours.

If only I could accept your heart and give mine to you freely, without agony and sorrow.



It feels painful to say what I’m uncertain,

to spill such rich words seamlessly, almost like staging.

Automatic

Heartless

Mechanical



If only I could feel less petrified.

Stone hearted

Static

Hard



God knows how desperately I want to bend,

but if I push myself, I will break.



I want to lie upon the beautiful red roses, and feel the bursting sun against my skin,

to feel warm,

happy,

ready,

beautiful,

human





But every garden needs it´s statues, and I keep forgetting that in a healthy one you´ll find both flowers and thorns.



''I love you, too.

But in my own twisted way´´

And here we are again
after all these years
sitting on the same couch
it feels so good to be here right now
with you
drinking alchohol until we forget who we are
and how much time we've wasted
acting foolish and ignoring eachother
we're talking about the same ****
we did 2 years ago
and still i love listening to the same story
over and over again
even when the music is loud
and  i can't hear you
oh baby i've missed you so much
don't leave me again

I drunk a coffee
and it tasted so good
But I would taste your lips, if I could.

i am in a haze today. it is cloudy and beautiful outside. it is also pressing down on my chest and i struggle for air. i wore your shirt to bed last night and it helped steady my oxygen supply. i wish you were here to say my name and speak to me in my native tongue to remind who i am and where i've come from. i'm forgetting everything, slowly. recreating yourself is only good when you haven't done it five thousand times over. i just want to be me now. but how do i become me if there is no you? pick me up from the library and walk me to class. hold my hand and tell me that you will stay with me no matter how grey the sky is or how cold my fingers feel.

All I want is a rewind to those times
When we talked for a long while
Seated under street lights
We were always together at nights

Staring at the moonlight
Our minds were filled with doubts
About what our future seems like

Then it went viral
That we were together
You asked how

I still don't know why

And it all sums up to now
Thinking of how we drifted apart
It was just too fast

But that was all in the past
All I wish for now is a rewind
So I can win back your heart

I really need a rewind ......

i have flowers in my veins.
many have them tattooed,
others just imagine the blue lines
as forget-me-not roots.

i have flowers in
my veins but i have
the sweet aroma
coursing in my bloodstream.
the petals disguise themselves as white
cells. the roots are deep within my
heart.

i have flowers in my veins.
and you planted them there.

You smell like mint and freshness
And I am so sorry I don't
I smell like plants and cigarettes and herbal teas
And you are my everything
And I am your nothing