shadows linger like the stench of your presence
i hope you choke on the **** of life
the knowledge of your name disgusts me
i know you'll burn just like the rest
everyone's struggling so what makes you so different
the depths await and my bags are packed
perhaps you should get packing too.

who do you believe in when you have no faith in yourself?
who do you live for if you're comfortable by yourself?
who do you die for if you're going to die by yourself?

who do you look down upon if you look down upon yourself?
*the pedestrians. i hope they don't catch me.

chicken wings

My biggest fear
Not spiders, not the dark, not  any clown
But to see your body,fully gowned
Your makeup done with your hair down
You're with a guy who is into you but I'm not around
The thought of this just makes me frown
You with someone that isn't me, 404: Heart Not Found
I'll swim in alcohol and in my despair I'll drown
The music plays but my thoughts are the loudest sound
I hate this place and I hate this town
Leave me to be eaten by the hounds

"You have to make it", that's what they say
All of me wishes there was simply another way
I wish life was effortless, I wish living was easy
Every time I fix something, there's someone else who needs me
I'm dependent on myself, and what I choose to do
I wish I could start over and be somebody new
Do I dare make that move? Do I dare change my life?
Even if I do or don't my existence is filled with strife
I resort to intoxication which temporarily eases the pain
But without it, it's like being stuck in the rain
On a dark stormy night, no lights and no friends
Can't you see I'm standing on a ledge...

*is there where my life ends?

corruption and greed
it is money that we need
to satisfy our hunger
for food and drugs and plunder
we know what we want and will do what we can
to be nothing but the top dog, the man with the plan
rats get fat while brave men die
if you're not rich, isn't it easy to see why?
they live in luxury and security
the way they earn it is through impurity

You're going to have to pay
I will make you regret what you've done
You took away her innocence
I will take your life with this gun
You carry on like nothing's wrong
I see through that disguise
You work your muscles so you don't feel weak
I will make sure that pain subsides
You don't even know me
I am sure of that fact
You should really look out for me at night
I will put a knife in your back

We both have feet to walk
We both have ears to hear
We both have mouths to talk
We both have skin to bare
We both have hair to shave
We both have nails to clip
We both have brains that make us brave
We both have tears to drip
Why is it that I feel so inhuman?
We both seem to have the same content
But you know i'd shed this body in an instant
It's like I'm some kind of alien
I know my eyes simply don't have that glint

I want to vanish
I want to escape
I would if I could,
I am wearing this blood-stained cape
It carries my morals
It soaks up the sadness
It burns all the fires inside
It contains all my madness
If only I could remove it
If only I could be free
If only I was myself
If only I were who I wanted to be

My body is empty
It feels like a shell
It still has guts, it still has a brain, but...
Where has the life gone?
Where has the energy disappeared to?
Where is the emotion I once felt?
Why am I so hateful?
Why can't I be faithful?
Perhaps it's the absence of something
A friend, that's it
An old friend
Somebody I used to know

Forget about me
Leave me to rot
I've already dug my grave
It's as comfortable as a baby's cot
My wish for death needs to be sated!
How do I approach this desire?
Each day brings me closer
I'm already walking on razor wire
This needs to stop
This needs to end
So goodbye for now
My dear old friend

Addiction
Some battle with it, some turn a blind eye
Just try it once and you'll soon see why
Don't indulge too much, they like to say
But being out of my mind is the only way
I can't escape the hellish grasp
I can only wait for my cravings to pass
For some it's drugs, for some it's ***
I wonder what vice will catch on to me next?