In this particular ether
He stood here
Waiting for me
In this space
He sat drinking beer
Smoking luckies
On this parking spot
He parked his car
Which we leaned on and kissed
By this fence
We stood smoking rubies
Talking about our lives
On this couch by the piano
I held his scar on his right wrist
He explained why he wore his ring
All those places
All those spaces
He was there
And on my skin
In my mind
He was here
And in my heart
He still is.

Despite the fact that you broke her heart
She somehow managed to mend it
Just so she could have it beat again

For you.

I steer clear from the things that remind me of you
But they always find me
Everywhere I go there's always a bit of you
You're everything I see
Evertime I sing, everything I write
Ends up being about you
Everytime I move, I want to move next to you
But you're nowhere near me

Everything I do it's always about you
Every chord I play, every song I make, every word I say

Every single thing I do
It's always
Always
About you

there comes a point where
even one of the biggest hearts
can no longer give love

those people who isolate themselves
they, too, once had overflowing love
that perhaps, unfortunately,
people have taken for granted

if you love someone
that's been hurt before
someone who pushes people away

remember that a big heart that
has been hollowed up
won't be so easy
to fill

I wanna spend my time with you
I don't really allot my time like this
I usually just waste it
But now I know where I want it to go
I want to spend it just to see your smile
Just to hear your laugh and fake cries
To mess your nesty hair
Admire your face
Memorize every trace of it and just keep you
To go grocery shopping with you
Go restaurant hopping with you
Pay bills with you
Buy a new air conditioner when the one we have breaks
Paint the walls of our home
Contemplate on which color scheme we want
Hold your hand as we walk places
Watch timeless movies while we're wrapped up in our quilt
Dance to EDM, just the two of us
Pass out next to each other
Go out late at night just to drink coffee
Cover our favorite love songs
Read books
Watch YouTube videos
Have tricycle rides
Manage our lives
Argue about big and small things
Cry
Storm out
Crawl back into each others' arms
Knowing that its the only place where we've felt so much love
Do adult stuff, together
Carry you to bed when youve had too much too drink
Kiss your forehead while you sleep
Take care of you
Love you
Over and over
And not get tired of doing so
That's all I wanna do with whatever time I have left
Just...
Spend it all on you
Because you
Of all things
Are most definitely
The one and only thing
That matters to me.

What if we hadn't tried when we were 14
What if we hadn't given in to the flow of our generation
Maybe we would still be whole
Unbroken
Fearless
We had so much to lose
We didn't see we only had a little to take

We part ways,
Then find each other,
I almost believed it was real.
I almost believed it was fate.

But,
Seeing how you are now
With her
Does something to my heart.

It makes me feel as though what we had wasn't important
Nothing more than a flicker of light
It made me feel
Like I'm somebody
That is easily forgotten.

But from time to time, in my mind, I put you and I together
And all I see are explosions
Explosions
Explosions of which are not caused my fireworks
Then
Nothingness

Its what we've been doing.

Come back
Leave
Over and over.
We let our hearts explode
Until
We lose pieces of us
And eventually
Lose ourselves.

My Darling,
My insanity is not one you can withstand.
That is why you love her.
But not because she's normal,
But because her insanity meshes well with yours.

And truly, my dearest,
I am glad you found a hand to place your heart in.

Forever,
and Always,
My dear,
I will take you with me.
I will always remember you.
And everything we've been through and learned from each other—

We can't always get it right the first time.