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George Anthony May 2017
time to say goodbye, they say
ten years and counting—
eleven after May

you never get over the loved ones you lose
the pain just fades a little,
like the bump leaving the bruise

you're a scar on my broken heart,
permanent and painful
but i love you like art

time to say goodbye, they said
nearly eleven years
nana, why'd you have to be dead?

they told me to move on so gouge out my eyes,
I'm tired of being subjected
to seeing a world where you're not alive
Yours was the first and last funeral I cried at.
George Anthony May 2017
the birds are whistling
twittering their tranquil
morning song,

it's 4 AM and i am imagining us
sitting on the forest floor of Trentham
with sunbeams bathing us
from between the trees

i feel at peace when i
hold a piece of you inside my mind;

nature's soundtrack lulls me
and my only wish
is that you'd be here
to listen with me.

darling, you're so beautiful
like the sunrise
creeping through the leaves

the light that brings an end to
the darkness, and
fights off the cold
with its gentle warmth,

and you give me life
the way water nourishes plants;
i feel like i can blossom when i'm with you

you're so incredible,
so genuinely unforgettable
just holding your hand

would mend broken pieces of my soul.
beautiful being
how'd you get so lost?

i'll give everything i've got
to lead you back home.
you're not alone.
I hear the birds and suddenly I'm almost in tears. I don't know why I'm so emotional lately. But I hear them sing and think of you, and I feel like I might be falling in love. I'm sorry.
George Anthony May 2017
it sounds like planes taking flight,
like foreboding,
like a hoard of wasps,
and then it breaks into melody;
it went from storming winds
to a spa reception
meditation:
inhale, exhale

dull these sharp edges,
take me out of my head;
i can see you
laid out on white cotton sheets,
your dark hair fanned
against the pillows on my bed.
no, i don't want to
do anything,
other than lie with you,
feel your warmth and...

i look at you and
tears brim these tired eyes.
insomnia's an artist
painting shadows on my lids,
but you reach out
and brush your fingertips against my cheek;
suddenly i'm alive,
your watercolours vibrant on my skin;
i'm overflowing with emotion
but you make it feel okay
to drown,
to let it in.

you'll never have any idea
of how much i think about you
i think, maybe, i would feel guilty
if i knew how to
but i don't do remorse,
just as you don't do...
well. this.
any of this.
try not to, anyway

things don't always
work out
the way we plan;
but it's okay,
we can make more plans
together, somehow
because you promised me you'd live
and i swore i'd do the same.
bleed of consciousness
  May 2017 George Anthony
thymos
and so what have i to offer you beyond
a collection of cheap and naive sentiments
matted in the dust of ineloquence?
i miss you, is all, but not even you:
an image of you, but not even an image:

the ghost of a fantasy. yes, i am
haunted, haunted by your absence
your senseless existence your
orbit without mass or distance
and all the rest, in its restless fabrication.

all that remains are your artefacts
with i among them, not quite intact.
Addicted to this strain of pen
The pain and rain embraces melt
Away in her oblivion
Still numb to opioids she felt
My love at last is laid to rest
In unrequited sleepless nights
And answers of indifference
To questions of my greatest heights
Free-falling fears I left behind
To see depression's comatose
Was riddled with my lucid mind
Still hers was what I craved the most
A stronger drug I've yet to find
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