we all seek the truth
walking around blindly
but we cannot find the truth
until we find ourselves
truly.

Bundles of circles, strung up in a ball.
In the fireplace close to the hall.
Ethnic and beautiful.
Really groovy.
A fear of grouped together circles and holes.
Distress in a ball by design.
Take that ball of trypophobia.
Throw it back me.
(c)Livvi

The riot of 14 years.
Years of broken tears.
They're rolling by.
Carrying no moss.
Screeches can you hear me.
Wants you not to  listen obviously.
She's growing.
Child to woman.
Security, must guard, at a distance.
Let the adult baby breathe.
Be there.
Be close.

The hormones flew.
A wild child
Beautiful.
A treasure.
Her heart was blue.
She was cold.
Exuberance of petty youth.
Her only fire was innocent ice.
(c) Livvi

Prudence tumbled out of bed, straight into a dream.
The grass, so tall it was brushing her ears.
Verdant dancing through the scene.
Imagine it.
Her hay fever troubled her, 'twas mighty obscene.
A king sized snake went slithering by.
She  saw him.
Frightened stiff.
Was petrified.
She closed her eyes.
Dive bombed by a bumblebee.
Panic set in before her peepers.
Just on a pollen hunt.
Jeepers' creepers.
Sat down between the massive blades.
Heads in hands.
Really scared.
Panic burned.
Snatched her breath.
Tears of panic gushed down her cheeks.
Heard a noise.
A mighty roar.
Her daughter beating on the door.
"Mummy mummy,
you alright?"
Heard you crying  overnight.
Door clicked open,
Still her nose dripped.
And her eyes, still itched like hell.
(C) Livvi

I stared in the mirror, looked at my own sad reflection and
wondered,

When did I abandoned my own self?
When did I lose my grip of my mental being?
Why did I hide under the covers to get away from the monsters?

I have never looked in the closet because I was afraid of what I might find.
My fears of the unknown have always taken me for a ride. A ride, I still can not get off of.
I have tried to lock the demons away in my mind, into the abyss. They always seem to break out of their prison and crucify my soul, when I am the least capable of fighting back.

My whole life has been in total blackness inside the belly of the beast. Only when I close my eyes, do I see a small glimmer of light or hope.

Then I wake up and realize the mirror that I have been staring into the whole time was broken and shattered.

DID I BREAK IT?

Deep inside
my heart cries,
out of mouth,
insidious lies

Crimes of lust,
feeling no passion.
Sense of mind,
soon will be crashing

Took it's toll,
pay no mind.
Alone with another,
sight is blind

No conscience, no guilt,
laying in bare
Wait am I thinking?
I really don't care

It's only a game,
but I can not win.
I am a cheater.
Living in sin.

Looking at the world
through acidic eyes.
Thunderstorm kisses,
pouring through dark skies.

Bands of rage and temper,
feelings all caged in.
Powder keg explosives,
blowing up again.

Black and blue circles,
hid under the cloth.
Red drips from my nose,
broken at all cost

Ripped down at the seams,
by every human thread.
Abandoned and afraid,
wishing I was dead.

Eyes heavy, bleary
brain shaky and
hands slow

neon green numbers
illuminate the room

fingers grind into a keyboard
but the blank screen
is all that stares back

I am cold as iced china.
I am hard as nails attached to a tiger.
I am flowing, like the mane of a dark bay horse.
I am a symphony.
I am an orchestra playing on my own.
I am a river, because I love the sea.
I am drawn into a portrait, enigmatic as the Mona Lisa
I am a play,maybe on words.
I am a well spun pun.
I am the queen of eccentricity.
Well, what do you think I am?
(C) LIVVI

Walking up the bloodstream hills.
Where silent warriors fell.
The land of noise and gun shot.

And so the holy fell.
As they fell into the asylum.
Rocking in chairs without rockers.

Enter stage left, the therapist,
the one with the listening ears.
He looks straight through those tears as whimsically they fall,
Drooling from your smile.
Trying so determinedly.
To try and raise a grin.
Matters not how hard he tries
You know he'll never win.
His smile mere mania.
Nothing whimsical dwells there within.
Pass him the gin bottle.
This mother's ruined,
(C) Livvi

I past by you
I only remembered you.
This is where I am-
and you are not here.
If only I can see,
again- I am in hope.

My heart skipped several beats
As i watched him caress his knife's hilt.
Suddenly numb went my feed.
Run, run my heart and head bid
But there I stood like a statue of liberty.

Darkness pressed at my shoulder
And the surrounding grew colder.
Each cut more ****** and deeper
Making him more satisfied and happier.
I tried moving but i grew stiffer.

Fast flashes and flares of fire
Seemed the sole sight my eyes sees.
It felt cold like being caked in an ice cube
Before all went bleak then black.
I could hear my heart hasting to a halt.

I started to find myself in bed
Frightened and gasping for breath.
Muscle cramped and wet with sweat
From the mere thought of death.
Surely being alive feels great