step one:
do not look at their mouth,
for you will expect to see rivers flowing from it,
poetry slipping through the space between their lips
in the same way that the wind slips through the space underneath a door,
but instead you will only see spit and saliva
and a tongue too big for its home.

step two:
do not look at their hands,
for you will expect them to craft cities from marble right before your very eyes,
but instead it will be just the thumbs,
the twiddling of thumbs,
the aimlessness, the senselessness,
the lack of experience with building empires.

step three:
do not look at their eyes,
for they say that the eyes are the windows to the soul,
and when you see that the curtains have been drawn,
you will feel so very alone.

step four:
i did not love you.
you have to repeat it.
i did not love you.
i did not love you.
i did not love you;
i loved what i thought you would be.
i thought you would be eden,
but you were only the apple.

step five:
i suppose i am to blame here
for digging holes too big to fill,
for crafting shoes too big to fit in.
and for that i am sorry.
i am sorry that i expected more from you
than i even expect from myself.

step six:
human.
human.
let the word roll off and around your tongue,
let it cover every inch of the inside of your mouth.
say it. over and over again.
say it. like it is foreign and you need to know what it means.
say it.
and when you have said it enough times and it feels
dull, old,
disappointing,
you will know that we are nothing more than flesh and bone,
and that as much as we wish there were gods among us,
flesh always rots in the end.
this is the beast of truth that we cannot outrun.
hands cannot craft cities from marble
if only given clay.

step seven:**
do not let this frighten you.
clay, after all,
was meant for molding.

(a.m.)

I was not blessed with rhythm,
Was not born to set things free,
Still working with the wine and the ****,
No longer dancing cheek to cheek.

She was the puzzle piece that did not fit,
The sound of the rain, the snow, and the sleet,
The white-noise lullaby that permeated summer
And invaded all my dreams.

Now I’ve given up on love and war,
I have nothing left to fight,
No reason to stay sober,
It keeps me warm at night.

It gets me loose in the crowd,
It keeps me spinning in my place,
Think I spoke to a beautiful woman last night,
Only, I can’t remember her face.

I know you feel it too, my friend,
On your phone in a crowded room,
Checking your exits everywhere you go.
Yet you stay for the company,
You stay for that minuscule chance
Of a late-night spoon.

You stay out for the hope
That you will not miss out,
You drink to forget,
To white-wash self-doubt.

You hear the beautiful music
And although you’re set free,
There’s an ache in your heart, saying,
No beauty could come from me.

I was not blessed with composure,
All the subtlety I lack,
But no man is perfect-
We’ve all got a hideous *******.

I’m a slave to my *****,
I’m a slave to my cravings,
Cigarettes, *****, and late-night food,
until I've spent all my savings.

I’m a slave to the working day,
To the white-noise thoughts
That rattle my brain,
To the chemical feast
And the paltry remains,
The scratch-card defeat,
The guessing games,
I’ve grown up now
And I’ve grown up strange,

I am not blessed with charisma,
I am not blessed with a tongue
That can say what it means,
It just runs and runs and runs...

I’ve been walking in circles and complaining
That I will never find my place,
So many fruits to pick out from the tree
That I stop and stare,
Watch them all go to waste.

I was not blessed with rhythm,
Was not born to set things free,
But you’ll come to like me
If you sit a while
And spend some time with me.

I wish I knew you better
so I could tell you what others told me
the little advice that helped
(most of it didnt)
But I would have told you
it doesn't get better.
You will never get over
such a terrible loss.
You will however
get better
at dealing with it.

But you will have nights
you cant sleep
because your best friend is dead
you will want to be dead

You will have days
you are so angry
because people are happy
and how can there be happiness
when such a beautiful person no longer exists

First the ocean spat us out
so we polluted it
then the jungle
so we chopped it down
and because we had not wings
we decided to **** the sky.

thread my heart through a needle
the size of your pretty words and
turn it around and double knot it;
i see it now: my life in an eye,
ah, sew it up, sew it up,
i don’t want to see this anymore.

We cannot take
a good, hard look
at ourselves
without help;
our own perception
a fun-house mirror,
twisting our foibles
into grotesques.
We become too big,
thinking we loom large
in the lives of others
who could not care less,
or we shrink into nothing,
disappearing from those
who miss us dearly.
Judge, jury and executioner,
we condemn ourselves
as not worthy of the air we breathe.
We cannot take
a good, hard look
at ourselves.
The look is rarely good,
and often far,
far too hard.

By Arcassin Burnham

Praying for the sick and the weak to be discreet and find
Passionate feelings then release into an abyss so deep
You can not find your feet,

I know your being hug and kissed by fellow angels
And loved ones,
Scratching your head for you are on the other side
Of what life intended for us to go if we're saved,
But baby girl you're blessed for even a soul thats not astray,
I feel that the Lord has you in his arms just getting
You use to the luxury that is as beautiful as you,
I don't know why they did this to you,
Vendetta's will be dealt with but For now I'm sorry
For what happened to you,
Should have happened a different way , yeah thats true,
We find peace knowing your with him when the
Days are through,
I but pray for everything  that you are,
Your family , your friends,
You were considered a star,
From Florida to Baltimore , we know your not too far.
We'll miss you Amy ❤

The first time you hear
"Beauty is pain"
Is when your mother is brushing tangles
Out of your hair
You're too young to care

The next time
Is when you're getting your hair done
For an event
Bobby pins everywhere
And this time it sticks

Your legs sting
After you shave them
For the first time
But you remind yourself
Beauty is pain
And go on with your day

You remind yourself again
As you pluck hairs
From your eyebrows
It helps you somehow

Beauty is pain
Your stomach growls
You haven't eaten
Because you want to be skinny
You want to be pretty

Beauty is pain
Is all you hear
When you walk into surgery
To change your face

Beauty is pain
Lingers in the back of your mind
When your boyfriend hits you
For the first time

One day you look in the mirror
All you see is pain
You wonder how it ended up this way

I am the clown
In this town.

To where i am the center
Of their teasing
And jokes
As if they never see me
Frown.

All they see is my
Joker's hat,
That everything
They throw
At me
Never hurts.

I guess that's all i
Ever be...

Perhaps it's my fault
For letting them think
That way,
I never fight
A war between egos.

Silence and smiles
Are all i ever
Masked
Myself...

i think
i've forgotten how to swim
but i'd rather drown
than reach for your hand
don't let me
pull
you
d
o
w
n
i've dug a hole
too deep
to climb out
save your ropes

it's a nice view from down here