Sometimes, I think I feel too much, like I crossed into a world of shadows; like there's been some kind of mistake.
Life seems to sharp, to vivid,
too right there in my face.
I feel like a stranger.  It's as if I were on a bus, and out of the tinted windows, things looked vaguely familiar. I pull the string and get off.
It's the wrong stop, it's the wrong world. The bus has disappeared;
there's no way home.  I used to stand on a bridge that a river flowed under. And off in the distance, high atop the ash trees, the eagles were nesting. They were so beautiful and serene.
I can't watch them anymore. It breaks my **** heart to see all the concrete and construction inch closer and closer to the little slice of heaven they found in a piece of nature
that seemed vaguely
familiar.

Every pattern is a cudgel to pain
Every equation rings out your reign

Its on the whispers and tirades of the wind
Its in the ripple of water and crashing waves of the sea

Each sinew tugged at and tortured
Frayed nerves screeching and screaming at me

Begging for the holy oil,
the balm of relief
The anointing of peace

Yet even that hope lies shattered
in the broken pieces of usefulness  

Dis-ease
distorted harmonics resonating agony
where once was perfect and sound cohesion

Each moment now a taught tension
a pugnacious trap for excrutiation

Every device is a loaded trigger for wretched pangs all I want to to do is merely write
Of beauty and hope to soothe

What sabotage for a poet
Whose pain enscription was a grateful muse

I find nothing of comfort
Because, every idea breathes nothing but signals heralding yet more and more pain

Just like the photo of us dancing in the rain
I feel like it might never happen again

Memory is a Pain upon a pain
Mnemonics are the seat of my suffering again

And your mighty reign of anguish
An insanity that devours me

But I will not succumb
I will remain

I will come through this somewhat sane
And you'll be that forgotten memory
I refuse to let inside my brain

The rent will be sky high
And I WILL BE ME AGAIN!

Sometimes we think
that the party
never ends;
that tomorrow
won't come;
but sunrise always
cracks our illusion,
until one day
dawn's sweet light
shines
no more.

She sits in
the truck, quietly
waiting for her
husband.
Spring's broken
promise.
25 degrees.
She thinks about the
robins, and their sweet
song.
She can almost see
the daffodils,
butter yellow.
She thinks of pancakes,
breakfast with the
family,
and all those caged
animals at the zoo,
with their poor,
tired, glazed eyes.

Just like Orpheus,
I descended.
Though,
my digression was
for different
reasons.
Yeah, I tried to
rescue you from
your hell.
Bring you out of
the degradation,
the debauchery.

It smelled like
***** and ****.
The swine squealed.
The harpies shrieked.
And,
I looked
too long.
I became you.

Thank God I escaped.
Fate dragged me
out by the scruff
of my neck.
I will never
visit your
underworld
again.
You've made it
your home.

Electric eyes that try and see,
yet you think you know me,
the truth makes you squirm,
yet in credance you will never learn,

It's the essence of your belief,
hollow pots that are full of grief,
tantric words massage your soul,
shouting words from a fathemless hole.

you think you can take it all,
but a trip always precedes a fall,
there's alway something left to sell,
but no more words left to tell.

the average cost of a funeral is
$8,515

death is unaffordable for me

put me in  big oblong cardboard box

2 feet by 3 feet by 6 feet

packing list enclosed

fragile (not really)
      please handle with care

keep upright

       or

supine

send me to the
grande vide

postage due

With furrowed brow
and a soul full of
sorrow,
I trudge the
lonely road of
perdition.
Providence guides me
as I stumble and fall.
Not even *** or
chocolate
can save me now.

Not so sly as they are:
spent,
wasted,
burned out,
depleted,
beat,
petered,
done for,
empty,
sick of,
enervated,
******,
stale,
exasperated,
fatigued,
drained,
bored,
fed up,
worn,
haggard,
flagging,
narcoleptic,
weary,
feeble,
debilita­ted,
incapacitated,
indisposed,
torpefied,
paralysed,
atrophied,
stupefied,
soporate,
obtuse,
And
Finished.

She threw me a
rock in a
sea of madness.
A twisted lifeline,
when I longed
for love.
Now it's just
empty space,
a knife wound to
the face,
and a new
house
that I can see
the library from.

Her shield, displayed,
Shunned errant knights.
The force field, impenetrable!
She was armadilo-like, but
No soft underbelly.
No teddy bear arms.
She endured a hard day.
Me, a soft night.
I strayed on my mini pad
Till her light turned out.
I lay on my side,
Beside her,
In another Romantic tale,
In a galaxy,
Far, far away.

I wish she were on my mind,
But she's not. She's in it,
And has full possession.

I've lost my mind;
I'm beside myself;
I'm next to an idiot!

She has my mind in her hands,
And I have time on mine.

She takes all mine. My time.
But I don't mind spending time,
And gladly giving all of mine,
If she would only mind me.
Mine me.

(There is treasure to be had)

Did you know Tony?
          Yep.
Did you know his name was John?
          Don't think so.
I get Anthony. But not John. I prefer Tony.
          "Preferred."
What?
          It's an excellent OB. Do ye think it does him Justice?
Justice! They never can. Not an entire life.
          True enough.
Great picture, though. That's how I'll remember him.
          True. And grinning wide. Nice, indeed.
Cheers.