I live through visions of distortion,
Wondering how to remain confident
Even through all the troubles and trials
That bind me from being who I thrive to be

I gave you a minute
To live for yourself
For once in your life
And you rolled up all that I had
To create a person
I had never met before

Through these visions you find
A hazy glimpse of what-once-was;
It spirals and contorts around
To find its chance at a true color
But it stays in its kaleidoscope of craziness

sometimes i hate how
i can put my life on hold
& forget about my own well being
just to solve someone else's problems...

all the time, i say to myself:

"i am not jesus...
i am not buddha...
i cannot save everybody."

they call it being "kind"
but they don't know that helping people
but being unable to help yourself
can be a form of self destruction too.

I was young, gullible, naive
When you promised forever,
I believed you with everything

I fell ******* a flat surface
You said you'd fallen,
But you had a safety net

Now, I'm broken and alone
And you're perfectly fine
And hate who I am

Subject

Shortly after our
first date I joked
Don’t make me write a poem about you.

It’s been a year and I laugh
because my poems
have become your home.

It’s been a year and
you’re kissing
someone else and
I’m just kissing people
who aren’t you.

Waking up next to you
for the last time
we knew it was and
we had to tell each other
not to cry so we could
kiss for the last time

When we broke
you said to me
I don’t want to be the subject of one of your poems.

But I warned you.

Masking the noise from the Hells below,
leaving me a new chapter to unfold
well my heart is crashing against my window pain
deadly weapons used to mutilate
down for my bloodshot eyes it rains
in my distorted reality
my soul raises up and down rapidly
my future races around the room
pasting through are deadly thoughts and fumes
of distorted people in animal costumes

I scream out for help
but not a woman nor man can hear
no longer I can't bear
the mutilated people I see and hear
I would ignore but they always reappear
right beside me in my ear
my "friends" fluctuate like a hologram
they come swing like wrecking *****
using ancient methods to destroy all

...I'm leaving I'm gone
But what if I'm wrong, could it be that you have my heart beating to the beat of your song

As I lay surrounded by only you, I continue to ask myself,"do I not have the right to say I love you?".

Flower eyes.
Cloudless smile.
Hair like a slow motion
Waterfall

Waving through air
Towards the center of
My breathlessness.
Flower eyes,

Ears made for music.
Skin; fresh snow upon warm
Sand crying beads of
Sweat from dancing.

Breath, a breeze that carries the
Scent of Eden's flora.
I open my eyes still dreaming,
Feeling fingers on my face,

Tasting nectar lips and the
Love of an angel having
Fallen for it.
Wingless thing,

Trading Heavens for our touch.
Unto nothing less than your
Flaming feather heart would I
Surrender.

Flower eyes. Petal tears.
Dream me back from this world
Of sharp edges and jagged realities.
Meet me there,

Where no rough imitation of
Our union could take root.  
I will rest within you.
Kiss your flower eyes uncrying.

My girlfriend's father turned
Sixty. The party was legendary.

I remember everything.
By the sea.

She was beautiful.
The microphone stang my

Lips as I read the
Worrior's Poem.

Her dress was the closest I came
To pyjamas this morning.  

Now her father won't stop
Laughing.

Bailey's and IPA for breakfast.
Sometimes eggs deserve to

Remain unbroken.
She's warm and naked in bed, and

I'm laughing all the way
To her.

Cover your nerves.
Stop picking at scars to
Make them wounds again,

Healing is the super in
Superficial.
Dry your tears when looking

Back; you'll see yesterday more
Clearly.
Bitterness is darkness to

The blind, grenade shrapnel
In the body of a brave one now
Fallen.

Stand up and smile at the light;
There are many enough who bask in
The blackness of their history.  

You've fought.
Bled.
Cried rainstorms and tidal waves,

Run your hands across the view of Heaven
From the bellies of Hell shivering.
It takes courage to fall,

Grace to fly.
So fly.
It's as easy as trying.