i don't want an apology
i don't need a half hearted smile
because you feel obligated
i don't want your pity
i don't need you to feel sorry for me
because believe it or not
being hurt isn't new to me
i just want a "thank you"
that's all
for loving you
when you least deserved it

romeo,
i've forgotten where we met
i think it was at some party?
you were with your friends that night and you were just someone who caught my fascination that time
the next thing i know your face was lit up from laughing at a lame *** joke i told that you deemed witty
and the night went on, we got in your car and drove aimlessly
there's a mixtape you made playing in the background- later on i found out that was your way of introducing me to your favorite bands
my heart badly wanted to get out of my chest the whole time- it was so loud inside, knocked up by all the anxious flutter you sent unknowingly through me, the weariness i had from willingly entering a stranger's car gradually melted
i was relieved that we actually had a conversation despite it being casual and light
i remember the way your eyes glimpsed at me as i got out of your car
and not even ten minutes have passed when you sent me a text saying, good night sleep tight
but i didn't really catch sleep not until it was 4 in the morning, an hour after i finally calmed down the slightest bit
and we took it from there and all the moments we've had are tenants in the hotel rooms tucked in the lone corner of my brain (i keep coming back to them)
it was all too fast and i was falling and it just couldn't be because what if i havent gotten in your car that night
if this wasnt written by the stars or some great force but just black ink over the lines of some doomed fate?
and it doesn't make sense and history repeats itself and everyone knows this is a tragedy where you'll come after me and it'll be the end of the both of us
i had to leave
i had to save you
because this was never supposed to happen
it's supposed to be romeo and rosaline or some other girl
but right now you probably found your rosaline in a pack and a bottle in your hands
and im sorry for causing you pain; you dont deserve to hurt

now i remember:

it is east where we met;

but quite frankly i am not the sun
-juliet

Take the heart,
Travel the sky,
Fly and shine like a phoenix;
strong and powerful.
To search for the One.

The roses are wilted,
the violets are dead,
the demons run circles around in my head.

So hush little sweetheart,
sit down and cry,
put down the razor,
you don't need to die.

Your head is a mess,
your heart torn in two,
everyone loves you and you love u too.

Don't use that razor,
don't shed that blood,
let your tears drift down like a leaf in a flood.

You're life is worth living,
though you may not think true,
Keep reading this poem
because its written by you.

So leave the razor,
let the demons run free,
everything will get better,
just wait you'll see.

Whenever your down,
read this aloud,
don't hurt yourself darling,
instead make yourself proud.

Because your stronger than you think,
more intelligent than you know,
and with each passing day your memories will grow.

To out run your demons,
I believe in this truth,
That if anyone can do it
I know that it's you.