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 Feb 2016 Ayush B
crystallaiz
12am* and imagining
a play on the dark ceiling
1.30am and relieved
for the 5 hours before light
but slumber is a deceptive guy
who lingers just out of frame
3am and wondering
when the sun will rise
end this torture
of lying awake
wanting to sleep
but being disturbed by
slices of daytime memories
haunted by the
ghost of tomorrow
6am and fatigued
wary of sleep that
comes in loose scraps
the sunshine peeks through
and it's time to live out
last night's tomorrow
which will metamorphose
into tonight's insomnia
I've been having more of these nights recently, and it *****. Big time.
Have you ever noticed
that when the unrelenting season
of air as crisp as the taste of september apples
comes washing in like the crash of sea upon the dry sand

It is on a day such as this,
on a walk I see
the meandering pines
stretching their hands to the sky
No longer appearing like branches,
they certainly look like roots.

As so.

When the summer is gone.
Perhaps the world is all upside down.
As I am upside down
without you.
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
Zach Lubline
You're scared, I know.
Or at least, you're unsure.
And everyone tells you you should
Be unsteady and insecure.

They say that it'll be hard.
They say it will change you forever.
And that there's no way of avoiding it
No matter how smart or clever.

But the thing about scare tactics
Is they just plain don't work
And the way you handle this thing
Isn't like him or her.

You've got your own struggle
And your own piece of cake.
So to handle it like they did,
Is a solution that's fake.

So maybe you need an extra hour
Of sleep.
Or maybe your test score relates to
How many friends you keep.

Maybe you work best
Under pressure.
Or maybe it's order
That gives you true pleasure.

The advice that I'll give you is just
To be true.
And to do whatever the Hell
Helps you be you.
To ask for help if needed
And sometimes to struggle through.
To learn to know yourself
Through and through.

So maybe Friday nights a party.
Or maybe it's a book.
De-stress with some TV
Or learn how to cook.
And never worry about when someone says
How long that assignment took.
Because for you it may be shorter
Or take a few extra looks.

And don't you worry about what THEY got
On that test.
So long as you're working hard
To do YOUR best.

Don't say "He did it."
Dont think "She seems ahead."
That type of thinking will just
Fester in your head.

Because you've got what it takes
Or you wouldn't be here.
Though we all joke about it,
A few things are clear:

You aren't just lucky.
You did a few things right.
You showed them your stuff,
Put up a **** good fight.

So you've earned your place.
And no one can take it.
And I have no doubts in my mind
That you ALL can make it.

So maybe it will be hard,
And you'll probably change.
But never expect it to be like us
Because nothing is ever quite the same.

And you get to decide what tests you
And what your biggest enemies are.
Because living someone else's life
Won't get you very far.

But we're here for a few things,
Only one is this advice.
The others are the hard days
And the endless nights.

We're here for the heartbreak
And the tears that may fall
Though remember that we're also
Here for the happy phone calls.

We want to help pick you up
When you think that you're beat.
Because once you stand back up,
There's no way you won't succeed.

So maybe these words
Have been little use.
And maybe my generalities
Are a little obtuse.

But keep in mind
That my ears don't speak in rhyme.
And I promise you they at least
Have always got time.

I'm a call or text away
And I'm not the only one.
You've already got a family here,
And you've only just begun.
I wrote this for a group of college freshmen entering the pre-med program I was a part of. Only a couple of them read it.
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
Callie Greene
My chest aches
My heart sinks
My body tenses

There is a hole in my stomach
and I wish I could dry my eyes
but all I see is what they refuse to hid

everyone is happy
with a lover or friends
and I'm in drowning in emptiness

Why the **** isn't anyone offering me a hand?
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
Sirenes
Be a Girl
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
Sirenes
A whisper reaches my ears
please just relax
We are going to serve you


A blue Light
Within the depths of my heart
You've been here since I was 5
Holding me together
From tearing apart
From losing my mind
You are the frequency in my voice
That people have come to fear
The commander that
Bends armies to it's will
How many times have I heard
"It's your voice"

Alright sure, I scare you again
How, I won't understand for the life of me
I'm just calm
Just me
Just scary to you...

Age 25, standing before the mirror
What does it look like to see me
Introspection
Suddenly and for the first time
I see it for myself
Never noticed before
Even while perfectly calm...

My teacher's voice echoes through my mind

"You walk in like a thunderstorm!"

But now I see it
I scared myself
There's nothing to be done
It comes from inside
The blue Light
The Source Light
The warrior with the color of my eyes

you need to come to terms with yourself young lady
you look like a girl but that's not what people see
they see a solidier, nearly two meters tall
let it go, reincarnation is a teacher
You can be a girl and a master at the same time.
you make men have to be stronger
so they won't try to bend you to their will
you stepped up to protect yourself and it's time to step down

And so I looked to Guan Yin
The mother of all women
I smile from my heart
make me a girl
Not a woman
Not a warrior
a girl
The smile is returned
And I'm dressed in
Soft pink and flowers
*On the inside
It's a tough day in spiritual realms. Spirituality is such a mind-**** sometimes. :D
Context: all my life people have been telling me "you're not really a girl" and all my life I've been insulted. Even my oldest friends took a few years before I finally got "*** you ARE a girl". Thank for noticing!!!
So I guess I'll have to start dressing in flowery dresses and such nonsense.
I keep looking for a song to define the moment,
                 But the sound of your name fits every occasion
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
Ciel
Do you ever wish

The bus ride would never
end,

So you could continue 

To stare blankly 

At the boring

Bland

Scenery passing by

On the other side

Of the horrid
scratched up

window

And not have to deal

With all the ******

Depressing

Empty

Thoughts 
in your mind

That contemplate 

Everything 
and
Nothing

All
at
once
?

Because,

Right now
,
I certainly don’t
want this
 boring 

Quiet bus ride
to end.

It’s much
better
than
the 

Noisy

Tedious 

Thoughts
that
keep

flitting
through
my brain.
Giving someone everything even if you get nothing in return.
Funny how it feels like love is so unfair.
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
moss
mood swings
 Jan 2016 Ayush B
moss
an hour ago I was crying
and back then I felt like dying
now I somehow feel like flying
it seems by brain is slowly frying
what's going on
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