I'm tripping over pieces of you to find myself again.
I’m jealous of every hand you’ve held.
And lips you’ve kissed.
And every secret you’ve told.
I’m jealous of everyone who has loved you before.
I’m jealous of every person who’s had the privilege of having their heart broken by you.
I’m jealous. Because I wish I was the first.
The first hand you held.
The first lips you kissed.
The first secret you held.
The first person you truly loved.
The first person who’s heart you broke.
I wish I was the first.
But I wasn’t.
all i know is that you shouldn't have looked at me like that if you didn't intend to stay....
*a sequel to "him" the guy i was seeing dumped me out of nowhere. im pretty crushed...
One day you looked at me with a gentleness and intensity that I had never seen before.
Your dark brown eyes pierced my soul and warmed my heart.
That's when I knew. As soon as you looked at me. I knew. I was *******.
No matter which way it played out. I was *******.
Because you were just too good to be true.
And my track record shows that someone like you would be the one to hurt me.
I should know that someone like you wouldn't fall for me.
You were just right. But at the same time you were all wrong.
Maybe it was me or maybe it was you maybe it was the timing or a combination of the two.
But all I know is you shouldn't have looked at me like that if you didn't intend to stay.
I wish I was mysterious like the deep end of the ocean
I wish I was as cool as a spring rain
I wish I was interesting like your favorite book
I wish I was as beautiful as a sunset.
But, alas, I am not.
I'm just me.
I am a nobody who can't be loved.
I wish you would notice me
But you never will.
I ripped my skin open
Spilling my secrets and blood on the floor.
But it made you uncomfortable
I was too open
As I covered up my insides
And sewed myself back together.
You looked at me with the softest eyes I'd ever seen.
But while I was distracted you fell for someone else.
And now that you're gone I'm still hung up on you.
After all of this, I still can't get you off my mind.
Won't you go bother someone else's thoughts?
I watched the sun rise from my window
And I couldn’t help but think of you.
I thought of new beginnings
And how I wish I could start over with you.
I wish I could go back to when we first met
I wish I could do it all over again
Maybe I wouldn’t mess up this time
Maybe this time things would turn out differently
Maybe this time you would love me
maybe unrequieted love
You were so unexpected.
We met and before I knew it you had wedged yourself in my heart.
But you don't care for me.
You never did.
But I'm stuck on you.
And I don't know if I'll ever recover.
I met a boy with bright blue eyes
He looked at me with a softness I didn’t know I needed
As he softly whispered
I just started seeing this guy, and he is wonderful, so patient and soft with me.
When I look at you
My words never seem to come out right
They are jumbled
Because you set a fire within me
That words can't put out.
What a terrible thing to dream of an almost lover
To wake up in no one's arms
in the freezing cold
of your quiet room
To be reminded once again
You are alone.
Open mouths, shut jaws
Trembling hands with strong wrists
Gut wrenching, butterflies dead
Restless nights, early mornings
Love gone, not forgotten
Eyes burning, but tears drying.
I’ve always been told to be myself
To be honest
To be real.
But no one seems to be ready for the real me.
I open my body up and my secrets come pouring out like bats from a cave racing towards the light.
But they turn to dust as you look upon them.
You tell me,
That was too much,
You’re being too open
You’re scaring people away.
They don’t like you being too vulnerable.
It’s weird, and uncomfortable.
But how can I be both?
How can I be both open and closed?
Enough, but not too much?
I only know love on one setting.
I don’t do things halfway.
I lived a lifetime in your eyes
before you ever said hello.
I'm not worried about our future
I've already seen it.
I refuse to continue writing poems about boys who didn't love me back.
I painted them in beautiful colors
Wrote their names in the stars
And spoke them into eternity.
But they were only fleeting shadows
An untouchable mist
Trying to fill me with empty words
And broken promises.
I will no longer bathe these boys with beauty
They don't deserve my pretty words
And beautiful promises.
I will no longer speak these boys into the brightest stars
And paint them in glorious light.
They are merely shadows
Hiding in a dark alley
Refusing to show their faces
Only shouting empty words into the void
Trying to catch a pretty girl off guard.
Maybe one day a boy will deserve such words.
But for now, I will be saving my beautiful words
For beautiful people.
We met in a rainstorm
Our eyes full of rain
We scrunched together
Our pace almost matching.
We laughed at the puddles
And the lightening.
Their power could not compare
To the storm that was brewing between us.
The rain was cold
But the fire inside our souls
Burned so bright
It kept us warm
And lit the way.
I could have gotten lost
In your gaze
But instead we walked on.
Trudging through puddles
Our eyes never meeting
Our shoulders barely brushing
But our souls already intertwined.
Tell me about the moment you fell in love.
Tell me how the room grew quiet
How all you could see was her.
Tell me the way you melted at the sight of her.
Tell me how your heart leapt to your throat
The first time she smiled in your direction.
Tell me how even on your darkest days
She is your shining light.
Tell me how you love her
And only her.
And I will tell you how I feel the same way
-you stole my heart, then fell for someone else
I want you
But you're not mine to want.
I miss you
But you're not mine to miss.
I love you
But you're not mine to love.
Will you ever be mine?
Do you crave me the way I crave you?
I ripped my body apart to appease you
I cried to you, for you, and with you
But you got angry at me for getting tears on your shoes.
heartbreak in it's most intense form.
I can never seem to form the right words
To tell you how I feel about you
You take my breath away
And my words escape me
To put it simply
My heart aches for you
I can’t explain how I feel about you
But I will spend the rest of my life writing poems to you
If that means you will be mine.
— The End —