I don't hate you,
I just can't love you.

I've dug a deep hole.










Now it's time to bury myself in it.

Motionless they sit,
Collecting dust on the shelf.
Completely inanimate,
An honest reflection of oneself.
I grab hold of the string,
No audience, no stage.
Now controlling this thing,
With my uncontrolled rage.
I give it a tug,
I crave the control.
Enacting a shrug,
I tug and I pull.
I've given it life,
I can take it away.
In spite of my strife,
It's now back on display.

The decision came too late and the opportunity went away.

We were looking over the edge,
You pushed me off the wall.
Though you were there beneath,
I'd rather concrete catch my fall.

"Pick your poison."
.
.
.
You.

I made one once.
People didn't like that,
Circumstances change,
But your feelings don't.

Impulsive decisions are the worst.
They attack from behind,
You're forced one way or other,
And soon, you find yourself back where you started,
But everyone else has left.

Completely and utterly alone.
Nobody cares,
They pretend,
But true affection is lasting support,
Not temporary stability.

As soon as it doesn't align with their vision,
You're kicked to the curb,
Beating yourself up until your knuckles are raw and you cannot bear the pain of aggressive actions any longer.

Then, regret settles,
But it's all too late to step back.
You cannot heal the scars you've inflicted across the surface of your skin,
There is no forgiving,
At least not from yourself.

You're stuck.
You have to live out the decision you made,
You cannot change circumstances,
You do not make the rules.

Don't cry for yourself,
You're not worth the tears.
Every drop would be better off falling from the sky,
Not from your burdening eye.

Decisions,
Don't make them,
They're not worth it.


You're not worth it.