I can’t control these urges
Will I relapse once again?

All it takes is one cut
For my soul to be lost

Blood drips down my leg
Was it worth the pain?

I am two months clean
I plan to keep it that way

get me out of my mind
this insanity is unbearable
inescapable
snap out of it, they say
that's debatable
it keeps coming back
consuming me
haunting
my mind is
broken

walking in a fog
once you get out
you realize
you have been walking
in water
the whole time

you're drowning

fall in love with someone
who treats your scars
like birthmarks

The weather is not bipolar,
It does not wake in pain,
It does not feel
a debilitating emptiness
running through its bloodstream,
poisoning its nervous system,
depriving it of all the things
that used to make it feel alive.
The weather is not afraid
to drink coffee
for the fear that it will spark
a week of sleepless nights,
a week of spending rent money
on projects destined to be left
incomplete,
a week of irritability
and unfinished meals.
The weather does not experience
mental illness,
people do.

sometimes I wish I had cancer
then people would send me flowers, and get well soon cards.
but I am bipolar
so when I am sick
I suffer alone, ashamed
because too many times
people synonymously use my illness for crazy.

-please stop

Is a dream I can’t have.

I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve
But I wrote a story on my wrist
Maybe someday I’ll let you read it
But first, you need to prove to me
You know that’s not my only story