I am a prisoner within my own mind

Consciousness is what I try to find.

I feel confined within my own dreams

I see you, but I don’t know what this means!

We said all that we had to in June

I remember being comforted that night by the moon.

Though now and then

I fall apart time and time again

I don’t know if this will ever end

Because I still wish I hadn’t lost a friend.

At night I can’t help but to twist & turn in my bed.
Nights I feel so distant and cold
Nights the wind chimes all the fairytales you’ve ever told.
I don’t know if it’s due
To the negligence I took to forget you,
But now I wish I knew how to.
You still appear in my dreams from out of the blue
We make happy memories here that feel so new.

But I know better than that this time
I know that nothing I did differently would ever make you fully mine.
I have someone in my life now and it makes me feel so guilty
I plan to get as far away as I can from this city.
Where memories fade and they can’t reside
I long to not feel this way inside.

I took the time to focus
I worked overtime to heal
And I’m hoping that you’ll notice
That what I have to say to you is real.

Not everything is rainbows and clear skies
To say that it’ll be easy, is to say a lie.
There will be bumpy roads
But I’d rather take them head on than to have to say goodbye.

There’s just no other way to say
if I once thought that being alone was okay
I was in absence of your presence
Your love is the sweetest essence.

You keep me on my feet
You’re like me, I think that’s pretty neat.
You make my head spin round
In a way that makes me want to keep you around.
The way you speak, your voice is an unfamiliar sound.
I’ve got a lot on my mind
With so many answers I’m still trying to find.
I panic at the thought that I’m running out of time
You hold my hand and tell me that you are already mine.
You brought me light when I was lost in the dark
I take one look at you and know you’ve already left a mark.

And even though I’ve let you go,
You’re like this anchor weighing me down below.
I still feel you merging with my flow:

Whether it’s the breeze,
That fills up sparse areas in the trees.
Or the relationship that takes place between the flowers and bees.

The way the sun beams down on me
Or the way waves move in the enormous sea.
One look is all it takes to think about what could be.

You see
Former me
Would have done it all
For some company
And honestly
Even then
there was no guarantee.

I could never paint the perfect picture.
Our colors were breathtakingly beautiful
but they just weren’t the perfect mixture.
Our names didn’t roll off the tongue
They didn’t sound quite right in scripture.

But then there’s you
And our exotic hues were versatile
Let’s get lost in each other
Let’s stay here a while.