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Tina Marie Apr 2015
I'm not the one that walked away
I'm not the one that stole your smile
I'm not the one that broke your heart
I'm not her

I'm just the girl you met one day
I'm just the girl that stood by your side
I'm just the girl that fell in love
You're just the boy that said goodbye

Because I'm not her.
Tina Marie Jan 2015
Torn between the most amazing man  I can't have
And one who is almost as great but right here
How do I justify waiting for love
When someone nearby holds me dear
The one far away holds my soul in his hands
But the one in my bed loves me so
I can't take the pain; I don't know
If the distant one will ever be here
So I'm just letting go
Something I've been struggling with.
Tina Marie Nov 2014
Huddled in the shower
The hot spray mingling with my tears
As I gaze back
Through the shattered years
Trembling and shaking
I saw you today
I ran and hid
Tried to think you away
I thought I was fine
I thought I'd healed
Thought I'd recovered from
The power you used to wield
You stole my sanity
I was just a little girl
Who'd never had a father
When you entered my world
For eons you used me
You dragged me into hell
And when I escaped
I thought I'd get well
Almost two decades
Have came and gone
But today I discovered
My mind is still wrong
When you're abused as a child the pain never goes away. Almost twenty years have passed since I escaped, but everything came rushing back and it feels as though I never left.
  Oct 2014 Tina Marie
Xan Abyss
I am not a hero
But could I be the villain?
Constantly I ask myself if I know what is right
I see the cruelty of god, and the damage of lost hope
And pray that I am not the one to bring about our destruction

Some days I wonder, am I in the right?
Is my behavior justified, do I walk in the light?
Or am I the crazy one, the enemy, the threat
Could my inner darkness really cause another death?

For I am not a hero
But could I be the villain?
Am I truly capable
Of unspeakable evil?
These are the things I need to know,
But not the ones I want to.

The Antagonist of the Greater Piece
Is the hero of his own journey
But could my happy ending be
The End of All Eternity?

The Monster becomes a mirror
And in the darkness I can see us clearer
When my reflection changes shape
Into a nightmare of disgrace
I begin to find my way
Back into my darkest state

And a hero I may never be
But could I be the enemy?
Could my happy ending be the end of all eternity?
Ever wonder if you're the devil and you just haven't figured it out yet?
///

It is very easy to bear a child
when you are a good parent or not

It is also not too tough to write some words
when you are a good poet or not

But it is too tough for a parent to grow up   
their child as being a real man

As it is too tough for a poet to make
a meaningful poem with those words

Though either you are a very good parent
or a very good poet

///
@ Musfiq us shaleheen
too tough as being a real man or a poet and this the reality
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