A heavy heart
Denotes an open mind
Abrasive thoughts
Taking hold and stealing time
Suffering waits not for the man who begs
But thrusts itself uninvited into the hands of those it selects
Hallucinations steal the truth from your sight
Join hands in a circle and pray your feet don't catch alight
The velocity with which your mind can unwind
The cross over your heart, the needle in your eye
Let all be a lesson to those who dare run
The thinking man casts his spells with the sun.

Sometimes
I get so lost in the detail
That I forget that all these tiny parts
Are just like stars
Scattered across the horizon
Shining alone
Oblivious that they are perceived as a whole sky

I think that maybe
People are the same
Down here there seems so much distance between us
But from far away
We probably just look like one connected mass.
And even when they feel like they do
Nobody ever really
Shines alone.

Take my name from your lips
As I have done yours.
No more will I allow your words, bitter and grating
To tear my skin and reach my bones
No longer will I lay crumpled
As though my body is pierced and my soul pouring
like blood from a slaughtered lamb.
No longer will your actions yield response.
I am done.

Is this all I am able to give:
This pleasant view for the beholder
This pleasant sound for those who wish to hear.

Am I just the fingers that clasp around the other glass of wine at your table
Am I just the number to add weight to the crowd
Am I but the silent partner
The pen to paper
The background music
And the ticket sold

Never have I carried a violent mind,
Still I take your words, a travesty on my character
Still I receive punishment for acts I failed to commit
Or that are buried so deep in the past
Even the tides have forgotten
But like the shore is broken by the wave, these too have subjected me to errosion
Parts of my whole, broken
And you may not now regret the thoughts you project
Until they replace the air in your opinions and the people in the room
Until you are left alone with them
As they suffocate you.

I could suffer in this silence
For all of my life
Lay here, stripped of ego,
Free of unyielding context
Free to evolve and change
To allow the torment to shape and erode me
Until all that is left
Are bones.

I don’t know why I was put on this Earth
born into a life I didn’t deserve
seen so many fall around me, walking right beside me till one day
I’m alone and taking up a space I never earnt
How do I justify my position when there are so many greats missing,
Trying to compare what I feel is my worth
to that of the departed and I can’t make the numbers work

I’ve made so many attempts on my life
I must be feline
and if I die tonight please know that this was number nine
but I’ve been close enough to the edge to know
there is no beginning and no end
just transitioning between what we see
and the spaces in between
I’ve travelled parallel my whole life
I’ve seen where souls collide in paradise
see we are all connected by the things we’ve done
the memories we keep, the thoughts we have and the people we’ve loved

My love does not have limits
It is not tied to neither means nor ends
My love does not depend on conditions or tricky terms
Nor does it require a single breath in return.
My love does not know sleep
It shall not fade with the day's passing light
My love can count a thousand stars
And sit beside you,
underneath them,
all night.

I do not live
I survive
I endure
I tread the same dark and murky waters I landed myself in all that time ago
Yet never sink
Sometimes I wish they would just let me sink
But like a bottle without a message
I simply occupy space toward the surface
Being of no purpose
But I just can't sink.

The No One is a charming girl
She flirts and sips and chirps and flits
Everybody has seen her
Though nobody can ever quite recall

The No One is a breezy mist of perfume
She sways and leads and flails and flees
She will ruin you
Though you will just as easily let her

She is always seen, never known
Always heard but never shown as anything more than a shadow or a fleeting moan

She destroys all she touches, though she never means to hurt
She never feels the fire in the match she holds til its long dead and burnt

Long gone
You cannot love the no one

I never thought it fair
The way we have life given to us
When maybe
The truth is
We were never meant to have it.

If the choice had been mine to make
I would have chosen a thousand skies
Trip across oceans and
never
Lay my feet to Earth.

Chained to an existence
When maybe I was never supposed
To be...
 Anything.
And now like a fallen bird who's wings are clipped
I can neither stay
Nor can I leave.