As a kid I hated reading.
I hated writing.

I never understood the words being said.
I could never keep up.

Then I wrote poetry

And noticed the words understood me,
and it all made sense.

Walking on a brisk fall morning,
I noticed the leaves had fallen.

The colors were beautiful,
What a time that nature decided to fall.

Looking out at the sea of leaves,
One tree stood before a tragic eve.
A storm that had blown all the precious leaves,
forced Mother Nature to grieve.

What could one do when all hope was lost.

Later on,
a warm fall evening,
I dare not say,
as I felt my mind was blown away.

I thought, why must the beautiful fall?
I looked up at the tree,
and saw one last leaf that still had yet to fall.

Why am I sad.
I think I might be a little mad.
But for no reason, it's so sad
I can't stop thinking about those days when I will be bad
Why do I count these days till then end of me
Would there be a problem with missing me.
Will no one even think bout me,
I just want to end it all right now,
All that **** that is stuck in my head rite now!
What the **** is this inside of me!
Is it real me trying to escape from me
Or is just you trying to **** me
When will it end,
I don’t think I’ll ever know.
But I think this is coming to an end
I just don't want to stick around to the end
So I will say goodbye to myself before this ends

We are the little things
We start our life with confusion
Wondering how we came to be her,
What started us?
Did we come out of knowhere.
Well you see now it's not so far to take a view of to what we thought.
Life is different
Our lives or the events leading to the big bang we are all that explosion.
We will never know it's purpose, all we know is that we are apart of it's a cycle
As if the stair cases that you go up suddenly lead to the place you started; the bottom.
You have to think of it as if two things collided created the universe but we are actually apart of those two things.
Skepticism is all that is poured on when you figure the mystery out.
Your life is a constant and wasn't created, never created for a long time just at one instance that is in a forever paradox, unfortunately we are stuck in the black holes of nothing , nothingness is movement of a creation.
We pass through a loop that takes us back to the same place trying to create something, we are the little reactions going on when the parts of the objects collide together to explode and create that reality; paradox.
Keep calm
You will now know
What it's like
To not be anything
People are right sometimes
Life and everything doesn't matter if it is nothing to begin with.
Leave you mindless.
But hey, you learned something; nothing.
Be careful what you find out there because it just might not be something.

My failure is my greatest success,
I build upon the failure,
And learn my success.

Don’t be a creator of my failure.
I will learn this failure.

Regret my success,
it will not contain you.

I appreciate the leverage,
don’t expect my regrets.

I will strive to always be above you.
I won’t stop for you.

Trust me when I say,
I will not stop.

I finally felt your love,
But it was too cold.

So I took off my sweater,
and sat frozen with you.

Palm trees sway, your mind relaxes.
Humid sticky air is flustered around your hot skin.
Every devient unexplained mind enjoys the water.
Happiness and enrichment reaps through the air.
Your time of thinking is higher than you can ever imagine.
You aren't in the place you want to be in.
You are an enclosure.
Manipulation.
It's too late now you have been deceived.
Now get out!

I filed a case of lies,
And searched for the truths.

I found nothing but an empty cabinet that I used to file.

By Adonis fin

I was there,
I was at that edge.
The edge of my ship.
My ship was strong and powerful.

Then one day it cracked.
The water came in pushing me down.
I was sad.

I was really sad.
Thoughts remorsed of the times in which I survived my first attack.

After that I kept walking.
I walked and saw what I didn't want to see.
I saw the dark over the light,
And the white was going out of sight.

I wanted red wrists.
I wanted the trail to be deeper.
As I look down I see the red turning blue.

Searching for importance as I looked up at the sea.
I saw the light fading away,
I told my self, "go...run for it".

I knew what I had to do.  
As my arms drooped,  
My head was down,
I took one last breath of air.
Grabbed my flashlight, Told my self everything will be ok

And walked.

That mist of cloud when its cold,
makes me feel alive again.

I feel 9.
Winter, waiting for my teacher to let me in the classroom.

I am 15.
Kissing the cold lips of my girlfriend as I put my jacket over her.

I am 19.
It's 3 am and I'm walking back from the library.

I am this old and I think about that cold cloud I exhale,
after taking a big breath.

i cant rite.
eye saw no place to write.
words never felt the same.
they meant one thing
then another.
i wish my words were noticed like a poet.

Last night I had a dream,

A dream about the perfect place.
A place offered by the ones who’ve loved.
I adored their magic land,

The land grew flowers for each step you meant.
It established your emotions in cement,
So that the world could paint the gifts you never sent.

An odd place indeed, it was a place for love to dream.

I like candles
I like flowers
I like poems
I like music
I like talking
I like beauty
Some may think I’m a girl,
But I’m not
I just know who I am.

I was Driving down the city road,
Not knowing how far I’d go,
Hoping the road will show me where to go,
And saw a boy sitting on an empty road.

A late night for adventure sight.
What might he be seeking this night?
Didn’t he see on the news about the boy who died that frail night on an empty road such as tonight?

I yelled from my car, “stop moving when you see my driving lights!”.
And so he stood looking all fright.

I begged and pleaded his mind won’t drift to a sorry sight.
I put my car in fifth gear remembering the night I too crossed an empty road with the face of the boy I saw tonight.

That night I crossed the road I remembered the pain and sorrow just as the other boy who crossed that road this very night.

I lifted my head thinking for those three boys who crossed this road.
I couldn’t believe the stain I must of caused to their family mind.

And so I hoped I didn’t drive on that **** city road, turning around to see the two little boys laying flat on that empty road.

Loved lost,
Tracks in heart for once his cost,
Never left his side for all is once was lost.

Broken by the unbreakable,
The road was gone,
And the grass had turned to frost,
he told me I was lost

When I wake up the birds will chirp.
The sun will rise,
As will I, when opportunity shines.

The sky will be old and the ground cold.
People will grow and plants will smile.

The world will stop.
So that the universe can spin.

What a Life that be.
What a Life I'll be.

When I wake up I'll still be in bed
And wonder what a Life should be.

One day I wondered for the ones who wanted pain.
Never understood till the day I stood on a stool, looking in a mirror with no vain.
What was up with these crazy clowns crying and moping around.

Little freaks dressed in black, staring at the sun for a little frown like em all.
Oh how hated these people, trying to dive deeper then they can fall.

I Ignore these little creeps with bad thoughts that spread and crept through town.

Then suddenly,
I froze.
The earth turned flat - taking a sudden bend.  My demons grinned just like the little kids I saw at school everyday and again.

I took my razor in hope that the slices would all make sense,
once healed it showed the stains I Ignored.

It was bright when I first walked out.

I took a couple of strides to see how far I’d get,

And realized my destination was too far - so I took a seat on a bench

And never took another step ever again.

When I wake up the birds will chirp.
The sun will rise,
As will I, when opportunity shines.

The sky will be old and the ground cold.
People will grow and plants will smile.

The world will stop.
So that the universe can spin.

What a Life that be.
What a Life I'll be.

When I wake up I'll still be in bed
And wonder what a Life should be.

It ain’t
          that bad.
                    I slept
too long.
     No,
        it really is that bad.
                                          Never had a dream.
It hurts, so bad.
         I wish I could sleep again,
                       But that take too long.

Don’t hit the snooze.
Open your mind with your eyes,
Ask yourself,  “how do I live a day?”

Hear what you see,
Take a break and listen to your mind.

Get out of bed.

Look in the mirror,
See the success,
Smile on your way out!

Say,
“good morning?”
“how are you?”
“how is your day?”

Say, “I love you” to your family, friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, all who matters to you, before you can’t.

Invite people over,
Go out and do something,
Share something meaningful,
Shine bright.

Live life on the edge.
Any day can be worse, and any other can be the best.

When you finish your day,
Think back and ask, “was this a good day?”.

Secluded in icy breeze.
My breath was visible,
And body stiff.

It was hot outside.
So I threw my watch out the window.
And watched,
my time fly out my hands.

You told me you loved me.
I sat soaking in your lies.

You told me everything will be ok.
I suffer everyday, hoping your gift will arrive.

You gave me hope.
You told me to go to bed.
I never did...

Why?

Why am I me?
You aged my youth and wasted my life!
I don’t ever want to be you!

But, unfortunately you are me.

Why?