I am discovering what it means
To be who I am.
Who I am,
Unapologetically.

I am discovering what it means
To feel truly alive
Without the weight of the world
To drown me.

I am discovering the feeling
Of no longer missing those who are gone.
To not feel the burden of longing,
In my bones.

It has been immensely hard to forget.

Their images embedded in me,
I've felt small for a long time.
A long time.

You move on,
But something stays.

Now I am living presently,
And doing something with myself.
And for once,
I am not afraid of missing you.
Any of you.

Your thought has been a terrible burden.
You've made me believe I cannot be happy
Until I find another you.
Or even worse,
That I never will.

Because I was not good enough.

And I will only ever continue to never be good enough,
For anyone I choose to love.
Because that is Who I am
Not Enough.

I must imagine,
Anyone who has experienced a true breakup
Has felt this inferiority within themselves.

But God, I am alive.

With my soul,
I know my purpose is to love.
And to continue to love.

I will remember,
That we all have flaws.
I may not be flawless,
But I am human.

And as every human is,
I am doing my best.
I am working hard, working hard to be a lovely human being,
Despite my flaws.

And so with love in my heart,
A pure will in my soul,
With a dire will to make my mark in life,
I am here. Today.

Unapologetically.

And this love, My love,
Is enough.
For it is all my soul, and all of my passion.
It is my strength, and my breath.
It is my literal life energy, in every cell of my being and it reminds me that I am alive.

This love puts the stars in my sky.
My love makes my world a magical place.

And I know,
I am not alone.

If my love is worth anything,
Then others will be invigorated
By my soul's burning light.
Through love, and generosity.
Patience, and understanding.
Through compromise, and forgiveness.
Others will know of my love.

In life, despite my flaws and my blemishes,
I choose love.
For it is in beautiful, innocent, and pure love that I know.
I am enough.

And I will not be weighed down,
By my past.

I am enough,
Because I chose love.

Good *** is
The feeling of not being alone
The feeling of being together
The feeling of being one.

Good *** is
The feeling of total acceptance
The feeling of being understood
The feeling of finally being cared for like you always wanted to be.

Deep down, you always wanted to be.

When you have good ***,
You no longer feel alone.

But you will be, eventually.
And good *** will go bad, if abused.

So when it comes,
Let it fill your heart.
But do not fill your heart only with intimacy,
Because you will always, eventually, be alone.

And jealousy is not the way to love,
The need holds you down.
Jealousy constricts,
While love will set you free.

When you experience good ***,
You experience the greatest love you'll ever see.
Because don't be mistaken:
Good ***, is intimacy.

It is cuddles and holding,
And passion and devotion.
It is caring, and together,
It is love, no greater emotion.

What is right for you is what will invigorate and inspire your soul. What is wrong is what does not nourish your soul.*

You will always regret having not tried more than you will regret having tried the wrong thing.

In trying the wrong thing, you realize that it is not right for you. And using that information, it becomes easier to discern what is, therefore, right for you. It will be easier to get to what's right.

And so above all, instead of feeling pressured to do the right things, and make the right choices, and never stumble or fall...

Feel free, instead. To do anything you can imagine. And I mean it. If it is right, good! And if it is wrong, then have patience. Because if we allow it to, then what is wrong can help lead us to the right path.

What is right, too, will eventually be wrong. The dancer will not dance the same way at 80 as they did at 20. The researcher may become too fragile for the stress of conducting research, though at another time they were not. We are always changing, as our needs do as well.

And so do not judge what is wrong in your life. Consider, instead, the possibility that what is wrong may be moulding you, shaping you, guiding you towards what is right. And when you find what is right, remember what brought you there.

We don't always like to acknowledge it, but sometimes it is the pain, the hardship, the way we felt broken that made us truly want to seek out love. And it is this strong, empowered will that moves us back into life. This is how darkness finds its purpose in the light.

The pursuits of the soul, understood through the mind and expressed through the body, are what make a life, alive.

Sometimes, I forget.

Sometimes I forget love
Sometimes I forget confidence
Sometimes I forget how to not be alone
Sometimes, I forget.

I forget life,
I stop feeling alive
I forget that alone is not in isolation,
But still, I can't. Find. You.

And it's scary to think that I'm on the brink of losing myself once again.
For where would I be, if I am not me,
I am lost, with no direction.

But I know,
This is where I have to be.

I know,
Love will return.

*you have to believe that love will return.

On the Fear of Getting Attached to Others, in a world in which we all fear loving too much.

I am Blessed
With an open heart
A freely loving soul
And a beautiful optimism.

I am Blessed.
With a soft light,
A burning flicker,
Quite lantern-like.

When it is dark,
My soul is here.
And it lights my way,
So I feel endeared.

I am Whole.
Because I understand,
I am softened,
Holding out my hand.

You may hold me,
You may leave.
You might not return,
But I won't need.

Because I am here to love.
And I've been blessed.
I have an open heart,
And it beats hard within my chest.

Many say they are cursed,
To love so easily.
But here I am, with a gentle soul,
With more love than I know how to feel.

But love is not need.
Need constricts. Love frees.
If you feel need,
Look inside, to your soul, for me.

Love's freedom my dear, and that's how you'll know,
Your feelings are healthy and good.
When what you want for others is for them to feel free,
You are set, you're loving as you should.

And there is no curse, to this "loving a lot,"
You are blessed with an open heart.
Need is the energy you need to fight,
With a simple joy lighting the spark.

Love is not something for you to hold.
Love is something for you to give.
For it is in giving,
That we multiply our love.

Alone, we are but a flicker of candlelight.
But when we offer our love to others,
We fuel the flickering flame of another soul.
In this, we brighten The Light of the World.

Give
Live
Love
Is it any surprise at all, that these words are so similar.

It's amazing
We thought the sun was gone!
But it's amazing
Like heaven and Earth are one.

The Earth needs to sleep,
It's getting quite late!
It's past the Earth's bedtime,
Don't keep it awake.

Where is the Earth's blanket!
Where is it, dear lord!
Oh there's the Earth's blanket,
Lay in darkness some more.

But the blanket isn't perfect,
Some stars will shine through.
Yes there are some holes there,
The starlight renewed.

It's dark

There is the night,
And there is a wolf.

The wolf is fierce,
And angry.
Its teeth glisten,
In the moonlight.

The forest is bare.
Void of leaves,
Of anything green.

It is winter,
So there is snow on the ground.
It is only you,
And the wolf,
In the night.

The wolf is so angry.

There is a river nearby.
The moonlight makes a spectacle
Of the stream flowing away.

You are alone here.
Alone with the wolf.

The wolf continues to growl,
And show its teeth.
It is as if,
Nothing can hear it.
As if no one will acknowledge it.

And so it growls,
And it looks you straight in the eye.
You just look back,
Hopelessly.

If destiny takes me today,
I will go.

The wolf growls for attention.
You are silent.
You are engulfed in your own mind.

You sit with it,
In that dead, cold night.
The wolf, staying fierce and angry,
Finds no resolution.

You are alone.
Your anger will not cease.
Your pain does not dull.
Time feels stopped, and you are there.
Forced to feel, every hurt that you feel.

In the forest,
You find solitude.
It is not okay,
And your anger will never quiet,
So in vain you rest, alone.
In the purgatory of the forest.
That temporary, superficial release.

The wolf never leaves you.
You sit silently beside it,
And watch the stream in the moonlight.
Time stands still.

You fantasize about drowning in the stream.
Then, finally, you may be free from the wolf in your heart.

You need consistency.

Relax. You're stressing yourself out.

Stick with it. If you never stick with anything, you will never get anywhere. Keep trying to make change.

You are not omnipotent. Any change you can make will be small. But this change, reaching your potential, will be multiplied by the small difference of many, many others. Together is how you will change the world.

You are a beautiful flower, in a universal garden.

You need to slow down. Do whatever you think will best relieve you of your anxiety.

I know you want to sleep. But you have to get up. I know the world seems unwelcoming today, but you need to do something, become something, that you can be proud of.

Why are you so lazy, and bad at working? You need to work harder, your dreams are not the dreams of the lazy.

Relax. You're stressing yourself out.

You aren't getting anywhere. You think you have more control than you do.

Why do you look at yourself like you're such a mess? People think you're more than that until they see your low self-esteem. Then your sloppy attitude repels them.

Just do your work.

Why does your work drain you, and leave you unfulfilled? You will never always like your work. But sometimes it is good.

You need to stop switching between wanting to be here and not. When you don't want to be here, everything is halting, and all your progress is stopping dead. Indeed, it's as though you are dead.

This isn't making you happy, is it.

I am
Are together the most powerful words you will ever say.

Who are you today?
Sad? Over-emotional?
Numb? down on yourself?

You decide, when you say,
I am.
You choose.

You may think life is a mix of what you do and what happens to you.
You may think that what happens to you is out of your control.

But perhaps when you say this *****, I wish I wasn't here, I am going to hate this, you are telling the world how to be for you.

This is terrible,
And so it is.

This isn't so bad, I am enjoying myself,
And it is so.

Perhaps when they say we are the universe,
They mean it.
And our thoughts are cast out into the universe,
Reflected back in our reality.

This is the key.

We think these thoughts, and they seem gone.
Then, our reality shows what we had felt, or thought.
And we call this what "happens to us."
But we happened to it first.
We create our own reality.

Life is a simple game when you realize this connection.
You can predict your future in a way, by realizing how you are feeling, and what you are thinking.

You can use your emotions in a reactionary way, as if to be on automatic:
Someone hit my car, I am angry.
I did well on my test, I am joyful.

Or you can stop yourself, and decide: how do I want to feel?
Who do I want to be today?
This is wakefulness: consciously deciding who you will be.

It is a blessing.
In gratefulness, we know we are free.

Realize that your life is determined by your feelings about it.
Your feelings (expressed in the mind through thought) are how your soul will speak to you.
Listen, when your soul speaks with you.

And say,
*Today, I am.