I keep thinking about sending that text
"thanks for yesterday"
whilst I suppose it's slightly less crass than
"thanks for last night"
as your reply was still heartfelt
"it was nice to have someone to waste a day with"
I kind of have to admit I read it as
"it was nice to have someone to waste away with"

I keep thinking about that night
the one I spent with you
thinking about how it didn't feel
more so than about how it felt
I keep thinking about who I am
and about how you weren't her
really, it can't be your fault though;
that the love isn't waning

There are days when i cannot find the sun even when it's right outside my window
There are days that i feel like a puppet
with the strings on my back leading to nowhere
There are days when i feel like I've finally managed to run away from you when you turn up...making it clear that i was only running in circles
I wrote tales of you with my favorite felt pen across any piece of paper i could find because, i simply couldn't wait to put down the butterflies that you placed ever so gently at the pit of my stomach down
They flew back and forth and back and forth
a constant reminder of the person i could never have .
the person i dared to love.

She was fun
in the way that
she would send
Poetry
to me
through text messaging.

Sometimes it was
just the way she wrote
to tell me to
do the dishes.

Other times,
it was prose
and verse
helping her make sense of the day.

Sending her thoughts
from the cosmos of
her mind
into the cosmos surrounding
our terra firma,
converted into
zeroes
and ones
and then
back into beauty.

You can
Walk on love
Like you walk on water
You can break a heart
Like you change the weather

You can go the extra mile
You can drive a Studebaker
Blow all the tires out
Curse you maker

You can
Say I love you
You can say I hate you
You can never say enough
When life gets really really rough

So when you learn to walk on water
When you learn you can't love one
And then another
When you live up to all your lows
put down all your highs
you can let me know

You call this a gift?
I call it a curse.
Turning all my thoughts into words
I don't qualify for love
Cuz I'll never be good enough

You think Say Goodbye wrote itself 

Nah I pulled that story off my dusty shelf

That's where all the skeletons and demons lie

The ones that taunt me deep inside 

this is just a glimpse into my tormented mind

Don't like tapping into my darker side

All the things that I've applied to life

Is to try and fill a hole inside

One that hungers for more

Then I can give 

Watch your soul; you could be next.

The soul to fill the hole in my chest 

And all the darkness that lies dormant inside

Ignites a fire in my eyes

So tired of hiding all these lies

But I've got no senses I can hardly cry.

Maybe I should try one last time

To shed a tear and clear my conscience

To set free all the skeletons in my closet 

To set free all the spirits in my mind

I should try that one last time

even if costs me my life.

©2017 Written By Benji James

Take a glance
Take a chance
Take a deep breath
Breathe in the fresh air
Cuz you know that I'll do
Anything for you
Run your toes through the sand
Feel the spark that we both share
Trust in every one of God's plans
Come girl take my hand
Let the sun soak into your skin
Cuz you know I'll do anything
And give everything for you
You know I will
I'd lay my life on the line
Let me be your guide
Let me heal the scars
You hold deep down inside
I'll hold you close in my arms
Just like the sky holds the stars
Girl, you are perfect
just the way you are

I won't let you break down
I won't let you fall
I'll be there every time you call
I won't let the storm
Come crashing through your walls
I'll be there through it all
Yeah you can own my heart
I won't give up
Cuz I'm addicted
to everything you are
Cuz you're my drug
I know that this is love

Everything you do
It's so **** cute
And everything you say
Makes me happy every day
You're so sweet when you blush
Oh I just can't get enough
Of your perfect face
The way that you taste
Every time our lips collide
You ignite the butterflies
Deep down inside
And I hope I do for you
You know it's true

I won't let you break down
I won't let you fall
I'll be there every time you call
I won't let the storm
Come crashing through your walls
I'll be there through it all
Yeah you can own my heart
I won't give up
Cuz I'm addicted
to everything you are
Cuz you're my drug
I know that this is love

Princess you know I'm here to protect,
I'm here to defend
Can you feel my heart
bleeding through my chest
I'll bleed for you; I'll bleed for this
Cuz you're everything I am
I won't leave you a mess
I'll do everything I can
I'll wipe the smudged mascara
From beneath your eyes
Every time you cry
I'll take your pain and make it mine
I'd write a million lines
Just to see you smile
I'll hold you tight
Let's light fireworks tonight
To brighten up your skies
I'll never lie, yeah girl it's true
I'd do all of this for you

I won't let you break down
I won't let you fall
I'll be there every time you call
I won't let the storm
Come crashing through your walls
I'll be there through it all
Yeah you can own my heart
I won't give up
Cuz I'm addicted
to everything you are
Cuz you're my drug
I know that this is love

Let the fire of desire
Light that sparkle in your eyes
I love your smile
When you say
would you stay a while
Your teeth are so white just like the stars
that shine so bright
You're my lover, and you are my life
I see you as my future wife
So put your faith and your trust
Into our love,
cuz you're the only one
I truly want
The one that I love
You take me to heaven and beyond

I won't let you break down
I won't let you fall
I'll be there every time you call
I won't let the storm
Come crashing through your walls
I'll be there through it all
Yeah you can own my heart
I won't give up
Cuz I'm addicted
to everything you are
Cuz you're my drug
I know that this is love

©2017 Written By Benji James