Amy - Hello Poetry

Amy May 2023

I literally ******* hate you so much
I feel like you’ve seen inside my soul without my permission
You got me hooked and now you’ve let go of the rod
I’m so confused
I want to know what’s going on inside your ******* head
What the hell is going on inside my own?
I’m scared of you
You’re so good in some ways yet so bad in others
I literally want to know every single ******* detail about you
I want to wipe away your memories of any other girl you’ve ever had and fill them up with me instead

#relationships #crazy

Amy Nov 2020

Money Worries

The pressure cracks my bones
like a lofty barrel
Weighing a top my tormented back.

My rib cage once housed a humming bird
That half dead, plague ridden thing
flew away long ago.

#help #scared #trapped #money #pressure #sadness #panic #helpless #depressed

Amy Nov 2020

Loops

Thinking, thinking, thinking, thinking.
Who’d have thought?
My thinking is against me.
It’s pulling at my arms as I try to run.

Stuckstuckstuckstuck
Stuck in the pattern
Emotional quicksand
Dragging me back under
Over and over and over and over and over

I can never escape
Never escape
The loop

I SCREAMED TO GOD FOR HELP

each time I gasp for air and get dragged back under

I don’t even know if I’m making progress

God give me a sign that I’m making progress

That’s slowly descended into madness

#overthinking #ego #spiritual #god #save #help

Amy Nov 2020

Fuzz

Float me away
On a pile of flying leaches
Dissolve my edges
With acid made of clouds

The stuckness of my heart
Pulls on my veins
Pumping black tar around my bones

The crickets in my ears
Never shut up
Static attacks my cells
Happiness is just a game.

#happiness #sadness #feelings #weird

Amy Apr 2018

Mushroom

You’re gone
You wanted to be free
And now
You are

Amy Apr 2018

Freedom

I woke up today
Surrounded by boxes.
Empty they were
Not made of wood
They were made of cardboard
I realised the door was above me
I could see the light peeking through
I wanted to get through the door
Away from the darkness
So I stood on a box
To start climbing towards the door
But the box couldn't hold my weight
It collapsed beneath me
'Oh!' I thought
And I tried another one
But still,
Couldn't hold my weight
I tried and tried
But the boxes kept breaking.
I started to panic
I was stuck in the darkness!
For every box I stood on,
Another would appear
But none would hold me.
I began to weep and weep
I screamed for help
I shut my eyes
Silently crying
When a voice said,
'Turn around'
So I did.
And there was another door
It had been there
All along

#stuck #overwhelmed #patience #calm #story #freedom

Amy Apr 2018

An Angel Fixed The Hole In My Heart

My soul had a hole
It was a river flowing to Hell
No fish swam here
Only darkness
And Fear
I wished for Death but you came instead

Now what once was heavy
Is filled with feathers
And in the emptiness
Dance the colours of spring
I wished for Death but thank God you came instead

suicide was on my mind tonight. But I prayed to God for help and a softness came over me. So grateful

#depression #sad #happy #lonely #angel #love #death #suicide