"One night it was just him and me driving through the city. The lights were flashing shadows inside the car and he was smiling while driving. His hair was blonde, again. I told him not to change them often. He just chuckles. His eyelashes protruding and curly like small waves. He looks so beautiful. Huge buildings, lamp posts and tall street lights were surrounding us. There were neon light boards sign on some old bars who plays country or some old music i can't remember. There were people who were strolling down the street in their heavy coats arms clinging to another person by their side. It was never a quiet night here but recently it became somehow. He hated heights so much but he liked city lights and buildings. And i couldn't love him more. When he was in Korea, he sent me a cute love letter, his hand writing was a mess but i thought it was the most perfect one ever. He called every night and asked what I like. I always tell him the same thing for the past 3 years, "I just want you. Nothing more, nothing less." He just chuckles and i know he was blushing. But he still comes home with something for me. He's nice and kind and perfect. He takes my breath-away and i love him so much. He's my favorite painting. He's a masterpiece. He loves coffee too much, i just hope caffeine doesn't eat his system. He liked mornings and evenings. Life was better with his smile shining like the blazing sun and his sleepy voice telling me to go to sleep every night. He liked playing soccer alot. He likes his coffee bitter but his heart was pure and his smiles were sweet. He is very appreciative and generous and I couldn't thank the gods above for this wonderful human right here. He's my sweetest favorite serendipity and i thank him for our unexpected redamancy."

and they asked me,
"What is it like loving him?"
I told them,
"it was like tightly holding the most beautiful rose on earth while its thorns sweetly bury into my palms,"
i smiled and continued,
"it was so painful but worth it."

he was a star
i tried to reach
i couldn't fathom
couldn't keep;
he was a rose
that i couldn't pick
scared to see
it die in my pit'
i'd rather die
for it to breathe.

i walked in a garden
i saw roses, daisies, bougainvilleas
pagoda and peonies too
and somehow they reminded me of you

the roses reminded me of your lips
how it's so red and lovely
how it curves whenever your smile along with your eyes
how it separates when you laugh

the daisies reminded me of your eyes
how it slowly blooms beautifully in morning
how lovely when it slowly closes at night
how chatoyant it was when touched by light

the bougainvillea reminded me of your being
how you stood strong despite everything
how you stayed lucent and beautiful
how you let yourself bloom in many colours

the pagoda reminded me of your skin
how it's yellowish and eternally beautiful
how smooth and soft it was
how selcouth it seems in my retina

the peonies reminded me of your heart
how it's still exquisite despite of its fragile figure
how it's still eesome even though it looks wrinkled
how it stays strong and pulchritudinous

walking in the garden felt serendipitious
it felt like walking
inside your existence
and i liked it.

Your eyes are the ocean
Your lashes are the waves
It’s a privilege to drown in them
And even live just for a day

Your collarbones are the trails
My lips want to wander forever
Your jaw line is the road
I would walk forever

Your lithe being
Is enough to take my breath away
Your pure heart
Is enough to let me stay

You are ethereal
You are otherworldly
Your beauty is abyssopelagic
You are perfect

My heart flutters when I see your previews
(I became an agastopian because of you)
And every after sunset and sunrise
I still fall in love with you

In the beginning
on the dew covered grass
with the stars laughing in the sky
her arms found mine
everything was unintentional, as if it was the greatest surprise
us, her, I

In the middle
on the silky sand dunes
with the sun dancing in the sky
the space between her and I, expanded
everything was fast, as if on a planned schedule
us, her, I

At the end
on the flannel sheets
with the fan spinning on the ceiling
the air we breathed, touched, was separated by a glass window
everything was moping, as if heavily medicated

and this time
it was just her
no more us
no more "I"