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April Oct 2020
You looked at me constantly
I couldn’t figure out why
To this day I don’t know for sure why
But, I’m certain you weren’t seeing me.

If you saw me
You’d know
I’m someone who survives by being alone
You’d know
my face is the same one that needs to look in reflective surfaces
just to be sure every aspect is perfect

And you’d know a piece of me is never coming back

I wonder who you saw
and who you thought was looking back at you?
Wow I haven't posted on here in forever!
April Jun 2019
There's nothing but silence on your end
I thought that's what I wanted
but, now I'm wishing it wasn't coming from
April Jun 2019
I finally figured it out

I don't let any man
get too close,
take a part of me,
love me

because if I did
I'd finally be accepting,
your empty spot in my life,
needs to be replaced
and even with this realization
I'm still scared,
I'm never going to find the strength,
to let go of your vacant hold over me
April May 2019
whisper your sweet words
so no one can hear them, but us

hide your gentle touches
so no one can yearn to feel them, but us

....because I'm selfish,
I only want you to myself
April May 2019
No one will be mine
and I'm no ones
I like it like that, I do

Once you let someone be yours
all they do in the end
is make demands of you

So I'll be my own
April May 2019
Endless thoughts,
anxiety obsessed with me,
dark clouds,
sadness taunting me

These are the things
I'm still learning to escape
April May 2019
my soul,
so quick to scurry
as you pass me by,
still yearns for you late at night

I didn't believe your grandest
could pull me back in
but here I am... right back to your side,
held so tight

oh my soul, where did you lose your fight?
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