I come from New Orleans where the swingers hook up with the singers, and the boxes have a person inside who speak to you through a thick horizontal slot in the door. You come from Minnesota where the most aggressive sentence is “Hi, how are you” and you’ve attended church every Sunday of your life, even though you don’t really believe in god.

We came to the West to skate with the surfer junkies. But then the harbors got bombed and we moved out East to see the hipsters and the artists beggin on the streets. We went to the South with the racists and bigots were dying for a good show. We moved up North to escape from the 70s, and with the 80s on the rise we figured we’d best stay away.

The 70s were rockin’ with **** and LSD in parks and concerts, and on benches on the streets. The smoke in the air was everywhere, from the slums in Wisconsin to the cities of Dallas. Even the poor were lost in the haze.

When the 80s arrived with Rock ‘n’ Roll and techno beats from windowsills upstairs. The music was groovin’ and the ladies were fine. We saw billboards of our names in neon orange lights. The *** was replaced by coke, and the LSD with ****** singing and swinging with delight in our eyes.
When the AIDS broke out we were sick in our beds listening to Pink Floyd and Elton John, and still we were singing. The 70s got us high while the 80s made us die

We lived through wars in Vietnam, and Korea; we fought back the communists with red ink on our hands. We broke down the door into China and got them to arrive in the present and join the world. Although their chairman sits on a chair of lies he leads them with an angry fist in the air pumping “three cheers for Mao”. “Three cheers for Mao”.

When the Soviets launched themselves to the moon we responded with our money and flashed our shiny new machinery in their faces. We marked our territory and claimed triumphantly that “We’re the best”. And we launched our war nukes and pinned them into intimidation. Then the Cubans sought revenge for the death of the Pigs on their Bay. With rifles in hand we stormed the beach and unearthed Castro and his regime.

With our beds soaked in blood, and our dreams covered with fog, hand in hand we lay. We recalled the dances in the backs of old Cafes where the passwords were as simple as three quick knocks and two slow ones. We remembered the guns that pierced the heavenly chorus for the negros in the south. And we thought about the music of the 70s and the death in the 80s and I thought about you for a minute more.

Here's a little story about one of my best friends, and I
We've gone through the lowest of the lows, to the ecstasy peak of highs

It all started during the second half of 12th grade
Immediately a beauty caught my eye, fixated my gaze
Her aura was not normal and I immediately needed to know her name.
It was in that film class, where we set the stage.

I tried to back away, even though it wasn't what I felt in my heart
There was just something about her that struck me right from the start
I knew in her life movie, I wanted to play a part.

Not a supporting actor, not a stagehand.

I wanted that lead role, and so I took a stand
We then embraced our connection, and took on life, hand in hand

There were clashes with the cast around us
Mental strains clogged the drains and caused too much fuss
But we knew enough to build off of what we had, trust.
That and a whole lotta love, thankful for every moment
That I was blessed with this star from above.

But we were young, high-strung, and intoxicated by our surroundings
When we shut it all out, removed all doubt,
Together on a cloud it was no less than astounding.
A future we were founding, shined brighter than sun beams
It's in those fields where life feels better than your dreams.

Existence was constantly testing us, arresting us in prisons that felt so grim
I was fighting a battle against hateful people, one I could not win.
Voices from outside led us astray, to sin
An alcoholic's logic, made me wanna get a bat and swing
But we sparked a new beginning when we dismissed other opinions.

She was my sunshine, and I let her know
We nurtured our beings, continued to grow
Anywhere she wanted me, I would surely go
We never stopped to look back, groovin' with the flow

We never meant any harm
but sometimes had to disarm each other
when the alarms were blaring.
There were occasions that were downright scary,
But peace was found in each others' eyes,
Staring into the depths of one another's soul
We physically held onto each other determined to never let go.
Despite the rain, shine, or snow
We've weathered all weather patterns
Our boat we continued to row

Merrily merrily, wait where are we?

2 hearts, minds, bodies, and souls
Our blissful union had been on a roll
But spending life on a bus, depressed, and sleep-deprived was surely taking it's toll
Got me drinking and thinking there'd be a tomorrow I wouldn't know.
Became resentful with a head full of dreadful hypotheticals
Unto none I could bestow.

Someone drowned in the nearby river
I figured I would join them after a night of abusing my liver
I immediately considered, how I felt during her moments of weakness by the cliffs
I'd've been so hurt emotionally it would seem as if internally I was pummeled by fists
I then put a pen within my grip, now connecting the dots, it led to this.

I once pushed her away, now it was her turn.
I tried holding on too tight constantly watching the bridge burn.
Impending doom filled the room inside my head
Sorrow was now the only one to lay in my bed
Zooming down a road I knew to be a dead end

When the time came, the perfect vision of our future shattered
I still kept fighting for love, but felt it didn't matter
The canvas was torn, the paint was all splattered.
I felt as if it were a sick joke,
Causing my inner demons laughter chasing a happily-ever-after

She would still call on me, whenever I was needed
Like temporary medicine even though I felt that I was bleeding.
Never heeding warnings from friends,
I felt like nothing more than a means to an end.

I lost the two that were closest, but they found each other.
In that fire I was but a scorned lover,
Cast them off my island,
While they didn't know where my life or mind went.
Lived life fast, one could say hell-bent
Then spent a lot of time, with another girl.
Decided this was gonna be my new world.
Although, it was doomed right from the start.
I was this girl's "soul mate"
but she couldn't hold my whole heart.
I tried forcing it, picturing another forever
I hurt us both, my mind is far too clever.
We were both too hurt from the past,
I knew it was a matter of time, it wasn't meant to last.
The concept of hurting someone, I just could not grasp,
2 and a half years sure went fast.

The original girl would sometimes pop in my dreams,
It was never angry but I didn't know what it could mean.
Shortly after the breakup came in girl number three,
We matched, the fun times with glee
Surely we were on a loving spree.

One night it changed, my whole being felt strange.
Inside was a feeling that I just could not tame.
I was at work stuck on a trip down memory lane
Fiery passion was the game
I knew deep inside I needed that again.
Hurt to another came down like rain,
Never intended despite how much I could explain.

I needed to let go of past pains and invite love to stay.

I messaged the girl that was once the brightest star in my solar system
We let our feelings out and again our spirits were in rhythm
It was a new beginning
Even contacted my old best friend n let him know how I missed him.
I again tried to hug her pains away and listened to every word she'd say
Common contact was slowly turning the nights into days
Replaying memories and the talks of forevers with old and new lovers.
We knew once again, that we always had, us.

Memories irreplaceable
I smile when I look out the windowsill
Reminiscing on the old thrills.

Nights spent watching sappy movies alone
while she lay with her head on my chest to the beat of my corazon.  
We once had sanctuary in each other, a home.
So many times I held her with optimism while she cried
Mascara marks on a hoodie of mine have stood the test of time
In her once upon a time was the only place I could confide
Arguments and water balloon fights.
Sneaking around to see each other always felt so right.
Halloweens and the moments in between,
Knowing the grass on the other side wasn't any more green.
Beds that were beyond places of rest,
Places where our cosmic beings could confess, love.
The best of rollercoasters had us addicted moreso than any drug.
I let tears fall in front of her once, regarding the loss of my dad
She held me oh so close and told me I'd be the best father anyone could have.
We've grown with time, and I'm happy to see her still rain down sunshine.
I'm happy that we once had each other as lovers,
and have each other as friends.
The past is past, but the stories will never end.

Chillin like a villian
listenin to dylan
writin and thrillin,
as long as the good lord's willin

Sweatpants & a ponytail,
chillin with no make up on.
Cos' it's like my hobby now

Camo sleep pants
led zep tee
drinkin cold ones
and groovin to youtube

Watching scream queens
on netflix.
Texting & trying to figure out
what's next

Keying thoughts
onto my notebook
thinking hard about
a late night snack

Chillin like a penguin
cos' its freezing cold.
Wishing I had some hot coco.
Trying stay up late.

Toasty warm
inside my room
to step out for a smoke
would seal my chill

Chillin' is amazing.
I got the chills,
feeling like a cold hell
Wolf Spirit Poet is amazing

Chillin, blazin
mind **** amazin
oh these nights
dreamin and lazin

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~
1. Take care of your teeth and gums
Brush & floss, everyday (Seriously)
Keep your teeth, if at all possible.
They are your very own precious Ivory.
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~
2. a. Eat well. Do not deny your body
nourishment. Gals, you will want a nice
set of *****. Trust me...eat.
b, Try to not put on too much extra weight.
(no judgement here) Just that it is very
******* your body. Ridiculously
difficult to lose when you're older.
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~
3. Love the skin you live within.  Try not to
bake your bareness too long in the sun,
or burn your precious epidermis.
Cleanse, exfoliate. Most of all, drink plenty of water and moisturize, moisturize, moisturize
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~
4. Hang on to all of your bones.
You will miss them when they are gone
Take care of your hands, neck, hips and knees.
Once your joints wear out, it's a total ******.
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~
5. Keep movin' and groovin'.
If you stay still too long, you will get stuck
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~
6. Find the humor in everything. It is there!
All of life's lessons placed before you.
When all else fails, you can laugh about it.
(Trust Me. Your going to need this one)
~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

~Christi Michaels~May 2015~
Copyright © 2015 Christi Michaels.
All Rights Reserved.

The first time I died, it wasn’t intentional and it was only in my head.

I keep dying, I keep staying alive, nothing is intentional.

They told me to put glitter on my scars,

to cut off my fingers and toes and feed them to the earth,

they told me to live in ways that forced people to look at me.

So I

cut my hair,

dyed it any color, made people look.

What happened was, they stared more at my knuckles, skin that spoke “STAY HERE”

and I knew that scared them.

Put glitter on your scars, they said. Put paint on your body, push ink up under your fingernails, tell the world you are alive in all the ways you can.

So I sang my life on city streetcorners, I screamed my life in fast-moving cars on the highway, I closed my eyes while I was driving straight and I am alive, alive, alive.

I keep dying though. Everyday I keep dying and it still feels fresh now, like a new bruise just barely bloomin’ under your skin or your coat. I keep screamin’ to keep the demons at bay, I keep writing to keep the mania movin’ and groovin’ to what life is now.

I keep killin’ in my head, I keep killin’ the demons, but sometimes they touch the back of my eyeballs so gentle, I cry so deep, I leak I leak I leak.

Put glitter on your scars, they said. I will keep trying. My home is a place in my heart that I haven’t found yet, my home is watercolors and ink and blood.

To the ones who have wondered, I am still alive. Some days I barely speak, but don’t worry because I am still so alive, I am still screaming to myself, I am still putting glitter on my scars, I am still writing life into my skin, I am still putting water and sun on my face. I am still curling my toes when I hear good songs. I am still wanting to run when the boys look at me. I know they want. I know I want something else, something you.

I have turned my bruises into landscapes, my fingers into dancing sprawling actions, my fists are still here, I swear. They still say “STAY HERE.”

Getting Ready
On the go
Doing things
Need a blow

Giddy gaggle
Endless Gags
Toothy giggles
Tongues a wag

Dressing up
Getting down
Goofing off
Clownin round

Pretty girls
Wearing pearls
Dancing Swirls
Fluffy Furls

Blowing Kisses
Giving Hugs
Singing Ditties
Cut a Rug

Buoyant Banter
Flashing Smiles
Bubbly Blabber
Smoking Milds

Shakin *****
Gettin Down
Wigglin *******
Goofy Gowns

Keep a Groovin
Boogie all night
Shake Them Legs
Les Dames et Dynomite

Oakland
8/23/01

Music Selection:
Jackson 5
Dancing Machine

My lady, she can't get o'er me
My lady, she can't get o'er me
My lady, she always wanna be
My lady, she can't get o'er me

My lady, she got no more time
My lady, she thinks she's all fine
                . . .  thinks she's all fine

My honey, her heads all o'er
She's been searching for that four-leaf clover
She's been searching for that four-leaf clover
But it's nowhere to be found

Love stings but hornets can heal
Gorgeous woman, she do wanna feel
                                                 . . .  feel
                                          . . .  oh yeah

Love can sting but I can't go
Gorgeous woman, I did have ya so
But you ain't mine no more . . .
You ain't mine no more . . .

My poor lady, she'd been hurting
My poor honey, she'd been caught me flirtin'
Sweet gorgeous, there's no more groovin'
I'm sorry baby, there's no more groovin'

O' lady, you'd best be through'in
O' lady, you'd best be through'in

O' lady, we'd best be through'in
O' lady, we'd best be through'in

O'lady you'd best be through now
O'lady we'd best be through now

We'd best be . . . .  . . . .
We'd best be . . . .  . . . .
We'd best be . . . .  . . . .
We'd best be . . . .  . . . .
We'd best be . . . .  . . . .

*O'lady we'd best through
And outta the moonlight
Oh yea, Me and You
We'd best be through

Well we jumped on the wing
for a good Irish fling
kicked off the week
with a boiler

The banter was high
as we took to the sky
nothing in sight
was a spoiler

And the red eye at night
was a captain’s delight
we spread on the seat
of the liner

Arrived just in time
for a whale of a time
at the Temple Bar
and Diner

Well the Dublin scene
in the Old College Green
was wired and alive
on the corner

Where me and me' mates
paired in at the gates
there were welcoming arms
to us foreigners

And we sang through the night
and grinned in delight
with banjos, pipes
and lasses

Drinking whiskey and beer
in a boatload of cheer
the rooster got lost
in the masses

The **** in the walk
was out on the stalk
a wee little flute
on display

His shoulders were pinned
with a great big grin
they were such
peculiar ways!

Well we found em next day
(in a sauntering way)
got tossed in
all the commotion

What happened to you?
said he hadn’t a clue
or any
baldy notion!

Hit the road to Howth
little east, little south
the seaside town
was groovin

Found the Cobblestone Pub
for a jar and a scrub
the seabird sounds
were soothin

Then we jumped a train
in the lashing rain
the Belfast craic
was mighty

Hit the Thirsty Goat
with a parching throat
some Tullamore Dew
for a nighty

In the Crumlin jail
the spirits set sail
the IRA
was gaffin

There was Bobby Sands
in celestial lands
alive and proud
and laughin

The Griffin dance
was the final chance
the evening closed
in nigh

And we made our way
through the Chelsea lanes
to say our
final good bye

~ ~ ~ ~

Singing
Ay, oh…let it all go
safe haven in the wasteland!

Singing
Slainte’…take me away
to the old Irish sounds
of the band!

It’s Friday night and a group of us, the ‘university summer fellows’ (Quinn, Jammie, Monique, Lisa and I) are going groovin’. Quinn, a Harvard man (we’ve shed our jaundiced opinions of him), assured us he knows the Boston bar scene. We’re going to test that.

We told him we wanted to sway to whimsical beats and chase vivid, neon lights across dance floors, like a bunch of cats - till the hours get wee. His plan is for us to pop-in the “touristy” places, like ‘the Havana Club’, ‘the Manray club’, ‘Garage Boston’ and ‘The Grand’, we’re so 111. As usual, Charles is our party mom, escort and driver.

When Peter and I were in Saint-Tropez, earlier this summer, there were beach clothes - dresses, skirts and men's shirts - where they’d woven micro-LEDs into the flowered, dry-wick, fabrics. I think the effect is amazing, friday, and joyous. I got two skirts for everyone (all of my roommates). Tonight Lisa and I are wearing a couple of them.

Funny. I’ve mentioned it before, but Lisa‘s an audrey. Her school friends and roommates are all used to it, we’ve been exposed, we have built up immunity. But Quinn’s a newbie, when Lisa came into the living room, LED glittered and lookin-right, he was literally stunned. He froze, for a microsecond, his face went blank and his fingers wiggled, as if disconnected from his overloaded central nervous system.

“***! Jammie said, having just turned around, “holla at ya brooke!,” he declared, shaking his head in admiration. “Umm mmm,” he added.

“I’m sure.” Lisa said, starting to transfer things from her everyday bag to her glittery clutch, the girl cannot accept a compliment. Quinn, coming out of it, cleared his throat.

We’re ready. Let Friday night begin!

So you've got a grudge and a roll of dollar bills stuffed in your pocket
   staring through other people's lives and loves with those hungry eyes,
and wading through the refuse you've piled about yourself.
 
 So you go burning bridges and murdering saints, weeping oil and restitution
movin and groovin and trying oh so hard to impress those ghosts,
   those shades shackled to your heart trailing behind you like hamstrung legs.

So you go on wishing you were Dante and stumbling over Elliot,
   stuck in a loop, stuck in the past, or is it the past that's stuck in you?

So you blame the world, blame the stars, blame the very beauty that it hurts
   you to see, hurts you to love, but more than anything you blame me.

Well that's too bad, that you don't want to see, too bad that you don't want
   to be stuck inside of me, torn apart and inside out, just too **** bad
that you don't wanna be sad when the sun rises and shows me who you really are.
  
Now let me tell you something boy, and I'll be extremely concise, as forward
   as I can: It's time to stop running like a hunted thing in the night,
time to turn, to change and fight.

But you've got that grudge, and those dollar bills, and you wanna find some pretty,
   broken thing to spend it on; yeah to find some hopeless eyes to rub your
empty heart on, or maybe some sad hippie girl to get your conscience on.

Well its three o'clock in the morning,
And I'm on the streets again.
Bought me some cigarettes,
I think I'll try and meet some new friends.

Good evening America,
I think I'll buy another round.
I've been high for three days straight,
I don't feel like coming down.

Girl, I like the way you move,
Why can't we dance all night?
You got that New Orleans thing groovin',
You must admit, it does feel right.

     But sally said, "What do you know about my love life?
     "What do you know about when I'm not around?
     "What do you know about my love life?"
     I said, "C'mon girl, what could possibly go wrong?"

Girl, you know I'm gonna live forever,
I don't care if its against the rules.
I will buy me a spaceship,
Pack it full of fools.

Look out Sally,
You better duck your pretty head.
That man ain't coming back,
I do believe that he is dead.

C'mon Sally,
Why don't we slip away.
All we need is some way
We could change the whole world some day.

Now its four o'clock in the morning,
And I'm on the streets again.
Bought me some cigarettes,
I think I'll try and meet some new friends.

Good evening America,
I think I'll buy another round.
I've been high for three days straight,
I don't feel like coming down.

Hey Girl!  Girl, hey.
Hey hey ...

- 2009

when i hear notes played
the feeling illuminates my soul
like a kiss on the neck
but less high tech

when she holds my hand
a brilliant melody occurs
to that of bach cannot write
what a sight

when im in the pocket, groovin
or when shes focused on soothing
a line comes out
and infinitely shouts

i love you

One in the morn'
be at work by eight.
Smoke dances in the moonlight
while the music vibrates
through us...

Groovin' on the rooftop
candles dancing like the stars.
Women sing their blues songs
while guys play guitars
and drums...

And the humming gets smooth
like a home-brewed beer.
Velvet voices ring between
the buildings as the neighbors dream
of their  bills...

Packing the car to find religion
                 the idea to leave town by mutual decision.
                 Load the fam and my senorita
                check maps and head for Talimena
                On the interstate rockin and groovin
                 music helps keep the miles movin
                 Headlights on as night is  near
                Shadows get thicker watch out for deer
                Two green specs at the roadside, now six
                a brown flash jumps by on sticks.
               Always the does first , not the buck.
               Hitting wildlife makes a weekend ****.
               Get to the motel very late
                tomorrow's day with nature must wait.
               A new day now we find Route One.
                Talimena Drive a road built for fun.
            The fall colors are vivid, the air is cool
             It is timeless..today I'm  nobody's tool.
           Red,gold,crimson,yellow,orange,green
            a world painted with so many colors seen.
            A day blessed to spend in God's wonder.
           to see Talimena before  winter slumber

                                             by  Daniel Bottoms

Takin wax off this fender
I'm gettin into the beat
This Rag held loosely in hand
I begin to tap my feet

Slidin smoothly across these body lines
Like we're on a dance floor
Groovin to these rhymes

I remember the one instance
we really danced.

Wishing I'd taken the chance
just a little more often.

My body moving rhythmically
I'm twirling you expertly
Through the depths of my mind

I flash back to me and realize
I'm just holdin a Rag
Laughing at how I symbolize
You're a much better dance partner

tricklin' down
the railroad tracks
tickle laugh
forward back
movin' and a groovin'
rockin' and rollin' and I
can't seem to take
my eyes off you
and I just wanna
roll around with you
and yer rollin' 'round
my head, coo coo!
yer rollin' 'round
my head, coo coo!

Wearing matrix-like dark-suits,
these perpetual clubhangers
sport techno-designer-buzzcuts,
standing replicants
smoking
eternal cigarettes
with thin lips
& shaded-eyes.
Accents emanate
from their smooth tongues
& they look so young
in the moving light,
groovin' on less than
a hundred luft balloons.

Groovin' along and I hit my head
Things seemed great
Now I'm bleedin'
Always appears worse than it is
Like it'll never end
But at least I'm still
Attached at the neck

When you're alone
Being accident-prone
Can hurt way more
But it's better than having
A heart of stone

Remake the photocrapsh, you have it,
edit, make the moment be that moment

and we redo the steps, the dance
in the process of time come to pass…

Breathe, be a bit aware, the air,
that essential other than I, is there,

all around us, one gaseous natural
substance us and all the other actual
air breathers,
some in constant meditation,
seeking mediation between spirit and

truth that life tests if I can perceive,
the suffocation of a story, conceived
in side my suit of fingers and toes and
bones and blood and meat and sinyew.
--------


Worth any reader's taken time, to make up
for enticing any one to follow a child
in search of lost time, I'd say none taken, none
left to find
usefull, filling a certain vacuum uses fructus
we yoost to take as needed granted. As cheese
from butter blessed with a meaty rancid taste.

Pre-posed, as supposed, positioned
up, above your head, above our eyes looking
up, into the thinning air beyond the morning fog.

Hear a jet plane, and think that noise unignorable,
then remember not hearing it for days, in the desert.

The ignorability established, test if I missed a sense
shut down class, perhaps I am the audience,
in silent meditation becoming one in time difference,
my peace,
I give,
not as the material reality gives, or is the world,
not all the material reality gives?

Wondering wonderfullness, full double el full,

necessary respiring, reselecting next moment
to breathe, re-in-ex-aspir'tual inter mingling me

and thee, the e, in all out joint efforting t'i
to fructify and die to leave seed soil cannot
suffocate.

Suffer it to be so now, thinking imagined touch,
the breath you take and replace with modified air,
humanized winds waft away the stench of our city,

our only physical existence place time sequence,
relative to mysteries too esoteric, by reputation,

if one never learns to use the good, to make good
a hope, a hook, with mystery, a sur-prize, un earned,

posed to be essential experience, once, for you alone,
the prize of personal recoknowsis acknowledged,

it's your party,
you can cry if you want to, but the art involved's
below you now,

as we took your breath away.
-------------

Fun with functionality, feeling your wish
to feel included, fecundity of same sour dough
higher minds than mine let be in thee
some how sure your part's done,
passed, missed cue, or
not.
The entertained remain, unaware… only knowing

the show must go on, and on,
and people,
on the whole, be having life
in the midst of life supporting

reality, recogentle, wise
teach
as trees teach, learn as nuts do. One
touch, one mind, one time to grow old in…

----------------

The daily ef'
fort ification va
vacation
cancelation …
looking away
at you, I think, at you,
I aim a wish, a joyish wish
wisht at a once,

upon which all stories dangle,
awaiting your attention, caught.

In the spirit of honesty, snared,
are we honestly acting strangely
similar,
similar tastes acquired, tasting
-----------

Echo rock effect stone groaning
-digital echo effect edit if you care, imagine
Peculiar order
own self first idiom, I am
become first ideal me, being
as good as
my word, and nothing more
esoteric than a reading mind's
recollection of a beauty envisaged

as an instant too brief to measure,
¿
instance,
in contextuality
stopped, and sensed
as a fly-by why, loosed for use
in curious arts, acadamized, apt
to wink at reasons feeding war,
to prove worthiness, what rule
gives order authorship legality,

in the scattered cosmos, who
orders each star to form from
?-
Point potential pose- d
to be
energy, itself mysterious, as to d
source and precognitionation put to work
as the works of God, the creator spirit entity,
put dhe PIE- put'erthere, core cognizance
in me, my child reminds me, for the duration.
Go is an order not a game.
Dare blame the temple servants, dare
cast aspersions at the spirit speaking,

gibberish, you wisht was peculiar, your query
run with your parameters set,
so your query
pulls from the spirit of timeless truth, a quest,
a duty,
a call to you, personally fit for your benefit,

maleficence despised sufficiently
to pass as white noise under signal. Go.

----------

generic me, reacting temper-mentally,
- getting to the crescendo way on
- down the line

to form a personality, a person like me,
emotionally tied to my character, my role

in your life, I see,
the other in the air out there, at the other
end of this wind

breath of life itself, certainly not all mine,
but I did add a touch of exhalent chaos,
in a laugh,
at recognition,
gnosis lies esoteric more within,
adipisci as if adept apt
at marking old regions lost to religion
- parrot headed afternoon paradisiacal
intentional, estate realization, holy place keeper,
mental, fundaments
minimum augments
happy old form gaseous wedom form,

beholder of beauty shown to set the meme,
look into my eyes, think mere words make minds

adversarial, as proverbial order impositioning,

in your brain, the ***** holding your will, if you
will, imagine another mind, with a habit in effect,

set to alarm me, when you see
the back of my head, and I do not turn to see you,

there you are any way, any in the official plethora
of thinkable ways around the obstacle
ambition definitely a needed virtue,
the will to know there is a good way,
the will to not steal, **** or destroy to make it
true
work applying patient perfection
to your tasked self, assigned early on to pursue, this bit
bait, curious bait, as scentual instunk ready, ready
ambitious ends means in minds, imagined done
is good as done,
Jesus said…

Two or more, you and me, endlessly
actual mental agreement, gentle, peacish
way beyond groovin', we be entering coknowing

eaching out, under our stars, we all know
what they are, they are near enough to feel

we each get this one big judgement day win, once…

ready to rock on, sit in witness position, watching
time pass, feeling memories sprout recollected laughs,
take the time, use your own, it never matters

looking back, from your self awareness instant, slo-most,

snap shot scene manurable, yep, gnoshit, that smell,

bucolic, fancy pants word, for real live process smell,
earth in cogitation, using a cast of billions of cloven hoof,
cud chewers fit to a stall and a milk ******* giant calf,

holy cow, each cow contentedly cogitates, how holy
am I to live in constant motherly bliss, and no
bogus science to make me feel lowly, mere meat maker,

for the sausage eaters needed to clean the windows,
so we all can look in on each other and say hello, did

you know this reality was here,
did you appear on purpose, or were you pre
supposed to be, so be ye do be.
Done.
Or don't, being as how here you are.

The end.
Now we wait. The point being made, when we feel it

really realizably so real holy cow, wow, milch for minds,
blowing past reasons for war, what would a holy city do?

----------------
Make a milkshake and use raw eggs.
Don't die.
Here, contemplation, using your knowing to construct
a shelter for a spirit,
a heart shrine, in memorium,
an avatar, that's the word, now, image made in mind,
non projected, kept bound under covering rules, why,

Gorgons are adapting to our air, as we all imagine
monstorous men leading conspiracies, breathing in teams,

fighting like hell to push back the peace cannabis brings
the furrowed fretful brow, high, low or middle, now,
- pushing back opening cannabinoid reception link
- thinking we all tuned in, is not true,
- the sixties I dropped out of,
- some boomers lived in, to this very day.

we all imagine the excess success allows, and the weight,
we all imagine the schedule, and the cameras, and think,

what, me worry? Will you take the esoterica to task, you

imagine life reset
to win the reasoning contentiousness,
with defined ambits being wills used
to lieve be the truth that Jesus said if
he is, believe it or not, leave go you know, if it were not so,

truth itself wills you know… you asked

let thy will be done, mine, I hold in place, conserving
certain truths fed me as a child, pledged in aliegiance.

Some values from when this world was lit by fire,
some of those eternal flames, never let it go out,
lessons used to arrange children on the pyramid,

few were told by their granddaddies
to laugh ten times today, and take
the long way around the mountains, find a stream
and keep its pace, time through space at any speed,

mellow is mental, mind frames are, as well. We think
we see the world one way, but we see it always good,

inherently good, inside the air we breathe and have
our being in, mind and brain barriers imagined,
fallen
long before the reasons for the ritual, right structur-al
to form as a temple made not by hand in mental form

living stones, I presume, am I standing on your toes?
Redone dances long left go be a fantasy from the cave wall.

- tips in times of self rejection, madness of art
devoted sons, once taken to an alter by a broken father,

God, take him, I'll break him, I'll make him like me,
don't let that be thy will, I'll walk with this limp,

but I'll not lie and claim Jacob's well ran dry.

The sack of values a poor man uses to stay alive, sur-
realize reason for being fine with sufficient suffering,

enough, to let me know, it is part of the process of time,
as recorded to be remembered, once
a prophet told you to pay attention, and as it appears,
to me, from here, my entire wedom did,

pay attention, with passionate joy, no lie, not even
to get by,
get past the poison
through the gifted, take life as granted found in a
willingness to whistle while you work, like a little tea ***,

here's my handle,
here's my spout,
tip me over and pour me out… do recall, do, once, redoness

dance on rare either real or otherwise, riverdancing ductility,

until I run out of breath.
And rest.
Riverwise on the seaside, going down.

When you get old life is as complicated as can be…
so- I fforget some things.
So, they had a saying, in the early day of open nicotine and caffeine,

put that in your pipe, and smoke it. Just let be the function. Peace
happens, seemingly by chance, often in Septembers,

made intentionally memorable for a good reason. We smile,
inner chuckle counts for laughing.
"Surely Feynman was not joking"

Let that be a lesson in legalizing enjoyed ennui, put to good use.

Right now is a good time to start,
You’re not behind anyone or ahead of anyone,
You’re right where you need to be!
Start now, in this moment…
Look, see, know, be aware…you have everything you need.
Start now.
Right now is a good time to start,
With Faith, Belief in the highest good,
trusting, knowing, doing, Being.
Start now…
Standing in Love, knowing Truth, making conscious choices,
knowing you can make changes if need be.
It is time to start,
lets start right now, in this present moment…
moving forward, higher, trust in yourself,
Knowing…..
Right now it is time to start….
Knowing…You are One with Source/the Creative energy
and Being One with the Creative Energy, you are One with Everything.
Right now is a Good Time to Start.
(it's never to late, your never to old, just do it! 2013 time to be seen!)
~~~~~~~~~~~
Heeeey! How You be's so far? Me...I don't know...huh, don't know. feel okay, still a lil sleepy, gotta get some things in hand and work with it better...I don't know. feeling and sending out a lot of Love this morning. Sooooo, I'll see what comes up and what will be created during the process today.
You, create something Glorious today and have some fun. I'll let you know what comes up, when I know.
have fun, enjoy it all and celebrate everything....Big Smiles!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
today, this morning has be very peaceful for me...so far. Thinking about last week, on Saturday, I was in rehearsal, got a txt for one of the Love's of my life, he had just married is long time Love and I was overjoyed. Then, I got a Christmas card from a friend in LA, letting me know what I mean to her and her life...I was overjoyed. I thought; here I am in Memphis, doing what I Love. My friend/family is joining his Love with his Love and I got my Roses...for knowing that I have made a different and Loved are Roses....The sign...showing me that I am walking forward on this journey. That there is Love in my Life. Love around my Life. That Love is My Life! I stand tall in Gratitude's Light. This day...This week I create Greatness, joy, happiness, light and I Am Love!
I Am Grateful for/to all of You for sharing your life with me and letting me be apart of it! Thank You for staying and being apart of my Life. You...all of You, help to make the journey so Grand with tons of Light! A deep breath here because I am just overwhelm for all that you have given me...you are giving me and the lessons, experiences and adventures you have made with me. I LOVE YOU ALL TONS!!!
Now, get up, get out and DOIT! Do your thang baby because it is and will be GREAT!
~~~~~~
oh, what will this day bring? whatever it is I am ready, it will be good, it will be fun and it will be for me, to use for my highest Good. to receive a lesson and to give a lesson, that is every experience and I am aware and open to learn that lesson and to use that lesson wisely...conscious choice, that's it.
Staying focus, because it would be very easy, not to be. It is all coming together...I ain't come this far to stop NOW! Going to enjoy the day, my choice and it just feels gooooood! groovin' to the sounds and music of the day, listening to what is, knowin' what ain't don't work.Grateful, Thankful and so totally Blessed...releasing it, knowing it is done and Celebrating, knowing that I got It all cause I Got Love..
and so it is.
~~~~~
Change, it happens…can’t stop it…to grow is to change and to change is to grow.
2013 is a year of change for me and I will grow into more Good. It all happens…for the highest Good. Sometimes, it take time to see that Good. I must be aware…focus…open…knowing, working with it all from a place of Love and Truth…ready to take action.
Today, pulling it all in and working with it. Packing some stuff, finishing quilt (yes, coming to the finish line with it…pictures will be seen soon!) Enjoying, Celebrating, letting the boogie move me. I am Loving this day and Loving me and Loving my folks…all y’all…change is good, let’s work with it.
LETS MAKE TODAY THE BOOGIE DAY! Yes, everyone can boogie….
~~~~~~~
Today...looking for the good: that element of good that's in each and everyone of us...keeping my focus there and no matter what happen, what the action I need to take let it come for that point of good that's in me, you and everyone and everything else. As Patti LaBelle would say...A New Attitude. I feel if I come from a place of good, I will bring a lot of...tons of Good with me. Today, no labels, no judgement...looking at The Thing Itself and seeing that place where we are ONE..working with, using it and choosing wisely from that place of Oneness...Laughing, singing, having a Good time and knowing...that as One we can Change things but we must all do Our part...start with Love and Truth.
Now, the music start "....running hot, running cold our senses in over load.....we need a new attitude..." Letting go and staying open to...A New Attitude. Have a Great day and Enjoy...the Fun is only beginning!
~~~~~~
Knowing it is done. Everything, before I speak the words...it is done. Remembering that sometime is hard. All we need do is listen, accepted and follow the action laid out, don't try and change it...just Trust, have Faith and KNOW! It is can be hard at time...when we think we know better. "It is done as YOU believe." Today, double checking what I Believe...What I Know...and listening and following the action.
Today, in this moment...I Trust me! I know the Truth and knowing that we All are One with the Creative Energy, The Universe and Everyone and Everything that is. Seeing the facts, working with them but always, always Living in Truth and Love. I know...It is done, I just need to surrender, Letting go and opening up, taking action toward the Highest and All will, do, has worked out for the Highest Good. I Know this...It is done as I Believe. Oh, That's why I am always Celebrating and hearing...weeeeeeeeee! I know, I Trust, I Love, I Believe, I do the work, I am Grateful, Thankful and soooo Blessed...I AM and shall always BE! Have a Great day...I Am!
~~~~~~~~~
It is time for my Heart to open up and Sing! Today was a bit of a rollercoaster for me but deep breaths and staying with the upward movement, I did what was needed...a small Celebration but a Celebration none the less. Taking moments in silence to here the answers to so many questions running through my head. Staying open and letting go of stuff, making room.
~~~~~
Tomorrow will be a day of focus, seeing the good in it all and connecting...Letting Freedom Ring. Tonight I will surrender stuff up and breathe..quiet time with Curtis C.! ...and then the Blessing flowed with storms of Love. The music grew and the dance of Gratitude and Thanksgiving began...my Heart is at peace...
~~~~~~~~~
Ready: New experiences and adventures, working with all that is here for me right now. Loving every moment and the people I find in those moment, even if they don't want to be Loved. Creating a day one step at a time and having Fun doing it....That's it one step at a time, one choice at a time and knowing everything I need, want and require is here for me...awareness, Love, knowing and Truth, Great tools to work with. Okay, I am going for IT. Lets get this Party started!!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~
Change and adventure...adventure and change. That is what's happening right now. Making conscious choices, while going through changes and it is all a Wonderful adventure.
Today, I will see where the adventure leads and I am making the conscious choice to have a Good time with it all...Seeing the facts and working with them, knowing that it is all Goo,d. The really Great thing that is happening, with every step I take, I am shown, reminded, aware and feel all the Love that surrounds me...from everywhere! That is a Wonderful Adventure...to do your thing surrounded by Love! NOW THAT SOME BLESSIN'! I am so Grateful, Thankful and Happy...Thanks!
...and a Good time was had by All and All became aware that they were One, working with and in Love and Truth. Then, the creating and Celebrating just got Bigger and Brighter and they realize that the Good Times, just got Great! It was there All The Time! Have a Great Day!!!!
~~~~
Good Morning! Last night right before going to sleep, I founded out an old friend had made his transition, Jim Montgomery in Shreveport. Even though it had been several years that I had talked to him or seen him I realize he was one of those people, memories, point of references that helped me through many things in my life. His spirit, his lessons, the fact that I could call him...Friend. We did several shows together, shared meals, several Long talks and lots and lots of laughs. We worked at the Newspaper together in Shreveport, a job he helped me get and so, for awhile I saw him pretty much every day and every day he gave me something to help me along, to store away for later use and to just say, its okay, "I'm here if you need." Beside the fact, that you couldn't say Theatre in Shreveport without his name come up. He will be missed, there will be sadness and tears but as we work through the sadness, that feeling of Lost...Lets Celebrate the Life of James Montgomery and that he made a mark on and in our Life. How Grateful I am to know him. How Thankful I am for the Support and Love he gave me and How Blessed I am that He is still with me, that point of reference I can check in with, laughing as I remember the stories he told, wonderful dinners, doing shows in Shreveport with him, talks over wine...the hugs, the Love, the time he said, "I am here with and for you." without saying a word. I am very Happy that James Montgomery IS a part of my life. So, to my friends, no....my family in Shreveport as you work through the sadness, lets Celebrate the Life and the Gifts he gave to US...how Special we are to have had the Jim Montgomery (Uncle Jim) Experience. I Love You and will see you all soon!
~~~~~~
Today, I temporarily give up my office in the nation of Procrast, so I can get my stuff together and see what's going with me back down south. It is not easy but I will, I know, return to office, most likely after the 1st of March. For now it is time to get this act together and take it on the road and see where Spirit leads.
Surrender time...letting go and opening up to possibilities and opportunities...Great Day, I wish it was warmer.....

I'm gonna sing to you.
Just remember, it's the thought that count.
And the message will be within the tunes that I sing to you.
If not just the titles of them offered to you.

I sing try something new by the Miracles to relay my love.
Or throw in their lyrics, from you must be love.
Just know my message will be centered around love.

I will use Marvin Gaye, if this world was mine.
Maybe his and Tammi Terrell, if I could build my word around .
And break  it all down with the Temptations, you're my everything.

Oh, you will be sung too.
I throw in the Rascals, Groovin' and it's not even a Sunday afternoon.
All these song has, what I trying to sing unto you?

Yes, even the Beatles, I want to hold your hand.
Cause I'm gonna sing to you.
Even some Sinatra fly me to the moon.

Cause love is what I feel?
Even end it with the Beach Boys, don't worry baby.
Everything is gonna be alright.
One of their under appreciated love song.
Except the message is written within them.

The music fuels my muscles,
Giving them the final twitch;
The final burst of strength
To push myself up one more notch,
And further excel.

Written words within a song.
Wondering when love was the reason you smile.
Nothing about killing.
Nothing about the body physical side.

More about the one that caught your eyes.
Or what you did to lose the one by your side.

Nothing about being a hustler in the street.
Yes, remember when love was love.

Groovin' with the one you love.
Or just describe beauty only skin deep.
For when looks fade remember love still will remain.

danced with the devil

now im groovin

Doctor, please! I have come down with a terrible case,
a disease so rare you may have never seen.

She grabbed my heart and gave it a long squeeze,
I'm having a bit of trouble getting back on my feet.

I'd do anything for her so she lives her life with ease.
Sing to her, cook for her, and dowse my body in gasoline.

Hopefully, soon again I am groovin' to the beat.
I just love her so much I've forgotten how to breathe.

As she lights the match, I will not scream
because her darkness is something I'll never let myself see.

From the days Of My Girl to the days of I Want To Hold Your Hands.
Remember when the object of a love song was a woman.
Nothing about her physical appearances in clothes.

From the days we Cry Together to the days of Cruising and Groovin' with that special love.
Remember when songs crafted was based around a lady.

Even if the song contained baby.

Where?
Did we lose this situation of songs that the woman affection was what many guys were after?