Crescent orb radiates its crystalline sight,
languid lips coalesce like a tessellation,
the vexing vines wilder the incandescent-
glimmer but the burning impression remains.
Celestial bodies affixes a soliloquy amongst-
a halcyon tongue that revelate a rhapsodic-
episode.

Quiescent ambience rings a plethora of-
sentiments stinging on the mellifluous
lullaby. The lithe wildflower murmurs-
the euphonious recital of a sonnet that-
is unacquainted to the mind.
Luminous assemblies of fireflies retire-
behind the myriad of evergreen forest
as the insouciance wildflower approach.

Precocious primrose locked from the
scorching sensation of a wildflower
exhibited a lassitude facade like a -
waning lantern fiery on its final residues.
In the distant a wildflower and in
the presence, an idyllic primrose:
so scarce and so strange.

I admit, I’ve never chosen you.
Falling in love is temporary,
love is a choice.

And I surrender to you.

You’re heart is grandiose.
In search of an asylum,
the delicacy of your love,
softens my core.
Peering into your soul,
through the earthy green
in your eyes, that spec of blood orange
a fire lights inside of you, hungry
to achieve a purpose.
I want to be your motivation,
be your motivator.
We could lose time
but we’d meet back at the equator,
once again, feeding the fire
that lights for you and I.
We’ve survived darkness
time & time again, lost.
In search of that dwindling fire
we find each other, nose to nose.
We are special,  We are young, We are beautiful, We are complex,
We are strong.
We are real.
Years spent, trying to navigate
the passion of our love.
We’ve rebelled against time,
against distance...
We are flawed, we are damaged.
But we are stubborn in love.

I hope I’m not too late,
I want a clean slate
I’m not holding back anymore.
For the first time, boo
I choose you.

undoubtedly

                   rock...

with
        brittle
                    skin.

stoked

         fire...

burning
              from
     within...

As a child I asked my mother
to mend my lonely heart
to accept and understand me
as I am and not as who she hoped I’d be.

Please do not turn your pain on me
inflicting wounds so deep
that I refuse to ever trust myself.

Eyes aflamed with tears.
Sinuses clogged with snot.
Without comprehending
without words I asked for her patience
her kindness, to secure my innocence.
I asked for safety at home.

Had I known the violence she would sow
planting row after row
of red marks and broken hearts
I would have found a gun
and a safe little corner.
I would have asked no one
and taken the peace I deserved.

Prologue //
Love is a myth and we are broken records of repeated mistakes. There is no point chasing after something that doesn't exist, and you can put the pieces of a broken vase together again but it will never be the same.


Chapter One //
I played it cool, but deep down, I wanted to know how perfect would feel like with your lips on mine. I craved for your touch like the night yearning for the moon.


Chapter Two //
I spent days trying to find the perfect way to ask you out after our first kiss for you were a map to hidden treasure, and I wanted to be the first to find it. You had that glow, and I fell in love with the way you could make my heart race with just a simple "hi"


Chapter Three //
I burned every novel in the world that told me love was only a state of the mind, an illusion. Because I could have sworn I saw you in my dream, but there you were, even when I'm wide awake.


Chapter Four //
The sun had set but why was it still so bright? That was when I realized it wasn't the sun, but you. The light you carried blinded me and all I could see was you. My voice trembled and I squeaked out a shaky "Be mine?"


Chapter Five //
You said "yes".


Chapter Six //
I thought I was the only one who felt like we were growing distant until we were oceans apart. Or maybe we were both living on the other side of the mirror.


Chapter Seven //
Our greed had left a painful scar, now I gotta let you go. I was sure this was the end for the both of us.


Chapter Eight //
My heart refused to say goodbye even though my mouth already did.


Chapter Nine //
The clock struck 12:00AM on the 13th of that month. Immediately, regrets flowed like an erupted volcano and pride killed me slowly for the next 23 hours, 59 minutes. I made a mistake.


Chapter Ten //
You took me back in a heartbeat and I carved a promise in my heart to burn my greed in the flames of your love


Epilogue //
Time forgot to tell me that promises are dust meant to be swept away and that it is useless to attempt to catch smoke. But my love will still be aflamed, even if I have to remove traces of my footprints from your heart

Sometimes the whispers of the night
Are drowned out by the wailing of disaster
Hear the dolorous screams and smell the fright
Catch the story from the newscaster

All was lost aflamed
Lighting up the horizon
The devil left maimed
And a mother crying

An imbroglio of water and fire
Never seemed to placate
Home to only a smokey pyre
Left to vacate

A new sojourn
Hotel to hospital
A new adjourn
To suffer or a sacrificial angel

I'm not ready,
   to hold a heart.

I've been too long apart from my own.
Today is just the beginning.

I'd love to see love in another's eyes again,

But,
I don't know I'm ready,

To hold a heart,
Unprepared,

Will tear apart,
   the very bones and thoughts,
   you thought were yours.

So be ready.

Hold your own heart,
   Until it no longer burns.

Do not lay your aflamed heart in another's hands,
Just to watch them burn.

Be ready.
Set free the flames that be,
And breathe deep the air you've never seen.

Then you may hold a heart.
You will hold them together,
With only the unburning flames of a true love...
A love,
That costs nothing.

But today...
I am not ready,
To hold a heart.

~Robert van Lingen