Once again I look at my screen,
how happy I am to see your name,
how long must it have been?

I talk to you oh so keen,
the time without you was an eternity
how long must it have been?

Your invisible eyes,
your unknown smile,
I see them so clearly for this short while.

But now as we say goodbye once again,
I return to all the thoughts in my Brain,
Once again back in the eternity away from my screen…
How long must it have been?

You said goodbye
And a flashback of
Noneexistent memories
Came to my mind

My heart stopped
My voice stuttered
everything was nothing
and all I had was pain

I was standing on my porch
Breathing the ashes of your soul
Deaf-mute to any reason
Trembling between the how and why

You said goodbye
******* the light of hope out of me
Leaving me with another sad story
Missing pieces and a broken heart

- Custodio

Dreams are not
what they are supposed
to look like
anymore.
A constant blur
of reality,
reality meaning sadness,
sadness being
the most familiar thing
in this house.
My imagination
being nothing
but let downs.
Because i only know my dreams,
and sadness
is the most familiar thing
in this house.

she never
dreamed
of becoming
an angel

she
just wanted
to fly
and somehow

if
possible
touch the

         o      u
     l                d
c                         s

no, she
never dreamed
of going
nor entering
heaven
(she doesn't know if it even exists)

she
just wanted
to leave
the grounds
for a while
and see if
the fluctuations
are worth one's salt

-she's taking the biggest risk of her life

Once upon a time
I fell in love with myself
I loved the way I saw the world, with an innocence now lost
I believed every lie and dreamed of rescuing dragons from princesses
I still remember the day my world shattered, and I started see the truth
An empty birthday party
A lonely slumber party
Whispers behind everyone's back
I didn't want to spread rumors, but to keep my friends, I did
And with my words, I burned bridges
How could I trust myself after telling those secrets that had been entrusted to me
Unclean and repentant, I sought forgiveness but there was none to be found
Not from myself
I tried to redeem myself by stepping away from the games, but though I hoard secrets, the dragons have all fled
There is no happily ever after here

I think of myself
as a part of the universe
distant and small
cold, yet alive

I think of yourself
as the center of my universe
with me and every living
rotating around you

It used to be warm
It used to be bright
warm and bright
as sunrays in a spring morning

All that left in this hole
where my heart used to dwell
is a lingering feel
an eternal, empty feeling

You are a star, way beyond my galaxy
this is all I have become, all I have
a soulless heart
for a heartless lover

I love listening to that song,
because it reminds me of you.
I love it when it rains,
because I know you love it, too

I love the stars,
because they remind me of your eyes.
I love the ocean,
because it reminds me of your smile.

You hate that song,
because it reminds you of me.
You hate it when it rains,
because you know I love it, too

You hate the stars
because they remind you of my eyes
You hate the ocean
because it reminds you of my smile

I put on my makeup and I’ll put on my clothes.

I’ll paint on my smile and dress to expose.

I’ll laugh to keep the tears down and drown in my own soul.

I’ll twirl my hair and act like my life is amazing.

I’ll be extra nice to those who need it.

I’ll get called names but I’ll push them aside.

I’ll go home and wipe off my smile and cry in the shower.

I’ll take the razor to my thigh and watch the blood mix into the water.

I’ll finally be me and not the girl everyone sees.

-Gillian Askeland

Before the dawn, when I wake up
You're sound asleep, got no makeup
I look at you, I always do
You've got it all, but you've got no clue

Your quietness and mystery
And your unspoken history
Your calm demeanor, golden voice
A level head above the noise

Always on point, there's no excess
The words you say, the way you dress
No awkward move, no big disgrace
You've got all that and a pretty face

Your worst is better than my best
And if I could make one request
Don't smile at me, 'cause when you do
It breaks my heart and makes me blue

Don't want to hate you, never will
You do no wrong, yet hurt me still
You're everything he wants, you see
And all I ever want to be.