Flow.
Red.
Pain.
Sick.

Heavy sigh.

Ache.
Dark.
Mess.
Nature.

Clean the spills.

Emotional.
Bleach.
Death.

Purples and Pinks
Wrapped around for your kinks

Tight jeans and leather belt
In your arms, I tend to melt.

Shiny and black heels
Off a layer I peel.

My lipstick that's red
Tangled together, we fall back to bed.

Thank you for giving me someone relatable.
Thank you for the laughs.
Thank you for the character I'll strive to be.
And the romance that I can find.
Thank you for teaching me I can be strong.
For telling me I don't have to be elaborate to be happy.
Thank you for telling me to follow a dream.
Thank you for showing that villains can be close, or far.
Thank you for the songs that get stuck in my head.

In my dreams...
I fight.
I'm brave.
I'm your knight in shining armor.

In my dreams...
I'm beautiful.
I shine.
I'm your princess.

In my dreams...
It's happy.
No more abuse.
Together.

But, that's not reality.

Stop acting like we were meant to be
I don't love who you are, nor will I ever
crushes when we're 13 don't count,
So stop acting like they do

I fell in love with a girl,
and so did you
so ******* act like it.

It's like soda-
Bubbly. Sweet.
It's like sun-
Warm. Bright.
It's like movies-
Neverending. Timeless.

I've always loved to sing,
and what more there is to love
than my favorite little mermaid?

Who sings of exploring that shore up above?
Wish I could be...

Part of your world.

If only.

One. Two.
In. Out.
Struggled. Clenched teeth.

The sound wavers.
Hands to the chest.
A noise, somewhere.

Three. Four.

Rushing. Noise.
People, in varying colors.

Five.

No one will believe you.
It hurts.
It's scars they can't see,
Marks they can't realize.

When you say
"I'm abused", they peer curiously at your undressed body.

"I don't see anything."

My body is a canvas;
And whether I decorate it with
Tattoos or cuts
Shouldn't be your problem.

My doctor told me I was too thin.
I weighed in-
113lbs, 5'8"

My Mother told me I was too fat.
I was 13.

From there, I starved myself, like it was a test.
Don't eat for 36 hours, til hunger claws at you like a ravage beast,
Then wait 8 more so you can sleep before succumbing to a few sips and a ******* or two.

I had the flu,
I was 14
My mother didn't believe me,
But the disease almost killed me.

The Doctor asked me to gain weight, watching the scale tip precauriously to 110lbs.

When I say "I love you", I'm platonic

I love someone else, but I want you to be loved.

I want you to have hugs and people to pay attention to you.

But, I'll never love you like I love her.

Love is so much more than romantic.

When I say I love her- should it consitute the frowns of everyone around me even though I only love her smile and her friendship?

When I say I love Coke, should I be down on one knee with a ring in hand instead of sipping it through a movie?

Why does Love need to be Disney?

I'd like for you to stop romanticizing death.

For suicide to be considered the last option.

Because it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

And I can assure you, you will survive.

I've witnessed one person lose their life, blood streaming to the floor with terrified eyes.

I had another attempt to take her life just last week, swallowing pills like they were candy, until their scream of "betrayl" meant nothing.

My best friend struggles everyday, do fight the urge to paint her wrist, the razor her utensil.

So please stop romanticing these things.
Stop saying "It's not selfish" or "They just don't understand".

Because we do, you just won't let us help.