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Criticism from the wrong person
Is the greatest motivation
Correct me if im wrong.
I told him to let go
Of his mistakes and he
left
Now I'm wondering if l were a mistake
Why did l encourage him
Her  smile was hatred
coated as happiness and love
Not everyone who smiles as you is your friend!!
Know the ones who really mean it
You do not miss me
A painful fact which only
Makes me miss you more
Do you miss me like I miss you?
 Nov 2018 Sacred Johnson
Midnight
today I looked in the mirror,
and I really looked,
and I didnt like
what I saw.
because I saw
a girl with hollowed out eyes,
a slight beer belly,
and thunder thighs.
I saw
the demon on my shoulder,
the angel to my right,
and black in my mouth.
even worse, I saw
charred lips from the cigs,
smudged mascara from a boy,
and grayed skin from the depression.
and I wanted so badly,
to fix what I saw
but I,
I was too weak.
I haven't written in forever thanks to this.
Screaming, crying,
No one cares
Fighting, kicking
No one sees
Panicking, despairing,
No one knows
Drinking, smoking,
No one joins
Waiting, watching,
No one here
Shouting, calling,
No one there
End it all,
No one could stop it
If you're a lover, then where is your passion?
Where is your interest in me, your
curiosity of my affairs?
If you're a lover, then where is your attention?
Any given day, you ignore me for the TV.
You turn and say, though, you burn for me.
Given how you wait to be prompted,
is it hard to imagine I don't feel interesting?

If you're a lover, when's the last time you expressed
at least some minor urge to **** me?
How am I supposed to buy a charade
when I'm the one who must wind the key?
If you're a lover, why do you never write
about me, but when you're sad?
Where is your urge to hold me, as I've held
you cradled for all these years?
Don't you think I ever need protection or intention
without a beggar's plea?

If you're a lover, then why do you forget my presence
until I remind you that I'm alive?
The Boys in Vegas
Crowd into rooms
Bars on Fremont
DMs on weeknights
Watching, waiting

The Boys in Vegas
With their eyes to the ground
And their smiles to your face
Frightened, small
"I'm the man, I'm the man..."

The Boys in Vegas
Tell you that you're hot
Kiss you, tease you
But never call or text
Huh, guess he's on to the next
Trust me
I would love
To be your girl
But I'm sorry to say
We are doomed
Before we
Start

We are
Doomed
We are
Doomed
We are
Doomed!

Not because
We are apart
And not for lack of trying
But because
Round pegs fit
In my square space
But leave much to be desired

Because I-
In my aggression-
Will fill the corners with questions
Without much space for answers
And you will dance
Safe in your cylindrical home
The corners will sizzle
And I will burn
But you will
Be safe

Until
I choose
To break you
Into all those pieces
That are easy to fix
But sting to lose
Because I will
Most surely
Lose

We are
Doomed
We are
Doomed
My love,
We are doomed

But you
Are still
My love
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