2 year's ago
Hey God, it's just me.
I'm trying to reach out to you again.
Why don't you ever talk to me?
The people at my church say that they hear your voice in their times of need.
Well here I am sitting behind a closed door because I can't face anyone with tears in my eyes; but I'm reaching out to YOU...And you still don't answer my prayers.

1 year ago
Things seem to be getting worst, but I'm trying to look on the bright side;
I know you will make things better over time....right?
That's what others are telling me.

3 months ago
Actually, when I think about it; you've never answered any of my prayers
You never stoped the bullying, I did.
You didn't get rid of my mom's tumor, it's still there.
You couldn't get me through my problems because you never answered me.
I'm trying, im REALLY trying to believe in you right now but your not giving me any proof..
All I need is one, just one prayer to come true
Then I will know I haven't been relying on nothing.

last night**
No? Nothing? Really?
So now it's up to me to make things better,
Here's goodbye to the higher power that Is known as our Lord and savior.
I just want to know why.
Why when I have no proof of you, I still try?
still try and talk to you, to believe in you?
Why am I even writing this?
Is it that you actually don't exist or that your ignoring me?

Beautiful eyes and sweet smiles.

Lively laughs and happy life.

People barely see her cry.

How could she hide in the glittering of fine mask?

When nothing feels right and everythings torn?

How could she hide in the glittering of fine mask?

When sadness dwells within her?

How could she hide in the glittering of fine mask?

When melancholy eat her all alone?

Her similitude to the moon shows she's forever alone and unwanted.

She's hiding in the darkness of light because she needs to pretend thus people will not see her tamed heart.

She shouldn't feel this way when people left her in her way.

She shouldn't pay heed to the criticisms that underrating her for they will fade away as doth the dye on her hair.

However she couldn't stop her self.

How could she unmind them when they are the fire that keeps her heart alive yet extinguish it by their own spit?

She is just a puberal girl seeking for a match that can light her candle and illuminate her sombre world.

Yet,

Moon seems has a crush on her for he dont want to leave his partner and keeps on pulling her back to where she really belong.

Darkness.

It hurts the most
When the person
That made you feel special yesterday
Makes you feel unwanted today.

These words
Will never
Fully express
The pain
Inside
My chest
When I
Remember
That you don't
Want me
Anymore.

Snakes in the grass.
I inhale my cigarette,
knowing now what signals I missed.
I had hoped for a minute alone,
but he insisted on following me outside.

I glance up and he's watching me,
I wish he'd stop.
My checks flushed from wine,
but I am fully aware.
He is handsome.

He apologizes for kissing me,
causing my head to swim and me to fidget awkwardly.
I thought of someone else at that moment,
setting off a flutter of silent wishes.

I check my phone,
no messages and it's such a reach.
Give a man what he's after,
and he loses interest..
I sigh,
being oblivious must be a side effect of being me.

This mans muttered sentiments go unheard,
I'm only half listening to him now.
Knowing the idea of me,
is much different then having me.
I have no interest,
He's just another snake in the grass.

I pretended to be fine
But two nights without my meds made me see
I was not okay
Only e
            m
               p
             t
          y
I'm slowly fading
To the beat of your heart
You promised me...
'Til death do us part

I'm pretty **** sure
That is was apart of a plan
Or something else I would imagine
But right I don't know if I even can

I just moved on to distract myself
But even then I felt like
I was betraying the heart that you left again
Stranded to be ran over by a car or bike

You know that I already can't stand myself
And this doesn't make it any better
That you listened to her
And now I'm under the weather.

I need you
And I want you
But I guess you don't care
Do you?