embriagada por lazos de espera
la leche dulce roza mis mejillas
el olor de tu llegada contempla
contempla nuestra huida
                   [ven a buscarme
tengo tres cosas que buscar en ti
tengo tres razones para huir
la noción del tiempo se pierde
entre lámparas y té caliente
                     en la cafetería del sur]
embriagada por no querer
formulando respuestas de preguntas
que decidí olvidar
soñando entre hortensias para no dejar
de cortar

Last night
I dreamt of
Picasso’s cat
slipping through 
streets like an evil 
spirit with rumpled fur

I see her
Shining silently
Across the void
Across the galaxy
Across the universe
System is binary
Though close
To mononova
Honestly glad
The past is over
Mon cour et tien
She says
In her eyes
I know it's true
And patience
Is my strongest virtue
The vastness of space
And still in one place
My heart is moving
Breath taking
Where this journey
Ends I do not know
But I'll make the trek
With a new light
Mi estrella
Mon Etoile nouveau.

Cuando quiera que tus labios pronunciaran mi nombre
se me pondría la piel de gallina y mis huesos comenzarían a estremecerse
No estoy acostumbrada a ser llamada con esa dulzura,
una dulzura que sonara tan sincera

Por eso me trastorné tanto cuando te fuiste
Me dejé convencer por tus labios,
pensé que serías diferente y me convencí a mí misma de que te quedarías
aún cuando por adelantado sabía que no lo harías

Pero quién podría sospechar que una voz como la tuya mentiría,
que serías de la clase que hace promesas en el cielo
sólo para dejar que el viento se las lleve
tan fácil como tu te llevaste mi mente

Me tomó 5 segundos darme cuenta que me había enamorado de ti
te tomó 5 segundos romper mi corazón en tantas piezas,
tan pequeñas que el viento se las llevó
Ahora jamás completaré mi corazón
siempre me faltarán piezas y no latirá como solía hacerlo
pero sé al menos que seguirá latiendo
y creo que alguien más vendrá y hará lo mismo que tú
porque siempre es así
y vendrán los que sean necesarios
para perder tantas piezas
hasta que no pueda encontrar ninguna de ellas
y así moriré.

Sometimes, I am in love with myself.
I force them to witness my love for my melanin
because they would love for me to hate my melanin.
I know that I am seen, but I want to be heard, 
The first amendment allows me to speak, but they refused to hear a word-
that comes from my mouth.
My lips stereotyped as too black.
My diction too proper to act like this,
yet my slang is too ghetto to act like that...
Sometimes, I wonder what it's like to be white.
I hate being stared at when I speak in Spanish.
I never know if it's in disgust or in comfort, 
because the sound of the double "r" rolling off of my tongue
sounds like the ricochet of the bullets they fire from their guns.
Since they no longer can enslave us like animals, they slaughter us
because, "if I can't have you no one can."
I refuse to be put down.
I refuse to shutdown.
My brown skin threatens,
and you all should be afraid.
Because I will banish your negativity with my Latin American flow,
speaking in Spanish with the Bachata tempo filling my veins.
My Ebonics is iconic, 
and I refuse to be put in a box when the world is a sphere.

I... am more... than this.

Something changed
it was a new kind of pain
I don't know why
watching people run with bulls
being injured for no reason
other than to look 'masculine'
seems so pointless that it hurt
it was so painful it felt like my chest was closing
like I couldn't breath but I was
it wasn't a panic attack
I was having a bad day
I was tired
I wanted to go home
but watching something so pointless hurt so much and I don't know why.

Two days of school missed
I can't catchup on Spanish
my homework, I just can't do it
there's too many words for my head to fit
'food' was covered in year 7 and it's year 10 now
I don't remember any vocab, I don't know how
I guess the blanks, they're probably wrong
my knowledge of food and drink in Spanish is not so strong
I pick up my pen and try not to cheat
(use Google translate for help) although the translation's in the sheet
and I want to go to sleep
and wake up the beginning of next week (more like tomorrow or Monday morning)
I'll copy my friends they're in the same class
I'll get a few wrong it's not like there's anything to pass
or I could tell my teacher I don't understand much and stay behind after school
but I don't have time for that and it doesn't sound all that cool
she said I might not get it all 'do as much as you can'
so maybe I wouldn't have to stay behind if I said 'I don't understand'
It's only homework I can catch up on what I missed
but it's kinda difficult when I barely know Spanish