Skin
Deep

Touch me once again
Make me feel alive
Before I lose myself

There's no point in trying
If I can't feel myself
Human or not
The texture is not the same

Can't get up
                     Can't get up
                                         Can't get up
                                                              ­Get away from this dream
                                               Won't give up
                        Won't give up
Won't give up

Won't fall at the seams
As my skin falls apart
Softness reveals the truth
Sticky bleeding wound

If I tie myself up would you feel the stitches
My flawless skin now permanently blemished

Please don't falter
Tell me I am still soft
Please lie to me
I want to feel the same
I don't want to feel the weight
Of myself becoming nothing

Inside I am pink and delicate
I don't want to fall apart

Skin
Deep

Don't touch me friend
I am too afraid I'll bleed
I am just too fragile
Like shattered glass
End up hurting myself instead



© Sofia Villagrana 2018

i saw a morsel of the truth in our universe
today is such a tiring day, i thought
that when i get used to seeing everything
it will be easy, no, it was harder
the longer the time passes by

i’d love to see all the vibrant colors of the rainbow
but whenever i looked up, i just saw a morose sky
i’ve met anger, sadness, and pain all at once
i hoped to see happiness on this voyage of mine
so i laid back at the green grass
watching the flowers wither
and sun go down the ends of earth
i waited from different seasons
seeing how everything changed
from snow to water dripping on
the leaves of years old trees

as the daylight went down,
our dear moon went up unraveling
the true beauty of darkness with sparkling stars
the moon shines better at dim
but it looked sad somehow
in pain as she glows from above

i kept thinking why?
no one knows, will i ever know?
probably not.

and just like the moon
we, people
art of god
has a little secret
a pain
that no one can know
even it hurts
the most

She Tried so hard and it Hurt
             when she Failed

covered in scribbles and light gray lines,
             she couldn’t erase.
sour notes, wrong keys that Frustrated her

                                                            ­ No matter how hard you try

a trail of dust where a ball hit the ground,
             she was out.
so many different ways that Never Quite Satisfied

                                                      ­      No matter how hard you try

smiles in corridors at people and Inwardly,
             she laughed to herself.
Awkward conversations and vital Missing Details

                                                        ­    No matter how hard you try

so many opinions they Hid behind masks,
             she in her room.
word after word that just Couldn’t get the point across

                                                         ­  No matter how hard you try
        
                               ... you will fail
                               ... until you don’t

        She grew impatient.
        She Gave Up.

Chewing the hard burnt bits of cheese off of frozen pizza
I am soft, I am light, I am not giving a single **** about the extra calories I'm consuming at 3 AM.
Ellios.
But from the hospital my mother works at,
must have been reheated a few times now.
I don't ******* care. It's food.

And here I am. Alone in my bed.
Listening to Russian Circles and hoping
it'll help me write something actually worth sharing for once.
Eh, I'd rather not take myself so.

I like a few guys.
I like a girl very much.
I'm starting a new job.
I'm scared of what's to come.
I'm scared of disappointing everyone.
I'm an ellios pizza stowed away as leftovers, a midnight snack.
Hoping to be worthy of praise.
Sprinkled in trader joes seasoning. I'm just so special.
I'm tasty but I'm so much more than I seem.
Cook me in the oven, if you want me crispy.
I cure hangovers.
Just with my fingertips, I promise.
Sleep with me, and see.
You'll see that I'm honest.

You'll be there in the morning.
I might decide to take a hike.
Don't ask me to stay. You don't ever mean that.
I'm fine admiring myself in my frontal camera,
on a lyft ride back home with dancehall music in the background.
I'm worth so much of my own praise that I forget to text you back.