may my delusions
be smashed

may my sanity
be restored

He was struck and the noise
Was a gong
Calling me to my senses
He is gone

He fell for me
I fell over
It was lucky
Four leafed clover

In his mind I used to stroll
He never bothered
To share how he felt
Though he shared much

As the ending
I left him
He was sitting alone
Tear streaked

My own tears
Were slow to fall
In his wake
I lost it all

You tell me not to be stressed
about food, gym and health
you tell me not to be obsessed
and you remind me those days when
I would eat a whole bar of chocolate
without knowing what calories were
But let me clarify one thing
it's not that easy
Those voices in my head
are controlling myself
and I'm trying to defeat them
but I'm getting tired
as they **** all my power
I swear I fight them back
and sometimes I win
but sometimes I take
one step forward and two steps back
so I'm always here
surrounded by anxiety and fear
60…59…58…57….56…55
just simple numbers on a scale
but as they decrease
I feel so powerful, yet so scared
to cross the line
dividing sanity from insanity
and suddenly I'm walking on a tightrope
trying not to fall
into the darkest of all holes

The wind is screaming around the trees.
Interjecting between my thoughts and psychotic capacity.
What is perception to reality?
Is it laying in the gutter looking up at the stars?
Is it laying in a bed stained with someone else's scars?
Are you wishing, hoping for a dream?
Are you as close as you'll ever be tearing at the seams?
Was it a dream hearing her say your name?
Or is this low carb diet your price to be sane?
You're drowning out a girl who you call your psychotic capacity.
You're wondering why she's no longer in love with me.
What if she's the one with the lie, perception is reality.