he tugs at my sleeves
hands rest
rise and fall of his chest
rise and fall of a relationship
human connection lasting a mere 30 seconds

finite

yet we
as people
crave an infinite wealth of attention

validation

you say
with your thin lipped grin
your knock turn smile
your eyes
they are so, so clever
they draw me in
selling yourself as a product

you say
everything tends towards
e
  n
    t
      r
        o
           p
             y

Dawn Breaks,
Realisation beckons.

An unhealthy dependence on stability,
In an ever changing world.

Life moves with the linear construct of time,
As only it can.

Love falters when the foundations crack; It cannot protect you.

Passion is unsustainable and will not last,
The reminiscence of hot passion lost will not keep you warm.

You will never reach a constant happiness,
There will always be a balance.

Things that you know will be, won't always be.

Happiness will happen randomly; sadness will happen randomly; hopefulness will happen randomly; hopelessness will happen randomly.

In life we are always lost and when we think we are found;
we start to question who we are; what we are.

Because we will always believe there is better,
Because we are certain of it.

This intangible idea motivates us,
Even though we know we can never be certain of anything.

Are we able to cope with the change and the the uncertainty of it all?

Is the balance worth the constant consciousness?

Yes, because the human experience is precious to us.

Others experiences are precious to us and their experience tangled messily with our own; no certainty of when their part in your narrative will end.

We grip to our seats and live vicariously through their narrative and put ours on hold; or even merge the narrative so much it becomes one.

The pursuit of happiness can be fickle.

But the endeavour is never ending and worth every fibre of our being.

"Afraid of heights? Don't be silly,"
the hard metal only grazes the sky,
it's nothing, don't you worry.

I'd have never guessed you'd take me up there, where,
I could reach the stars, with wind flushed cheeks, hair flying,
and your crooked teeth smiling back.

The moon was such a bright white,
and your laughter set in motion a part of me I had never felt,
and this exhiliration broke the heavens,
us both staring in wonder and excitement.

Don't be afraid of heights he said to the small(er) middle school me,
and had I known he would look so...
magical mixed in with the night,
I would have never tried to say no.

A smile so large, I think my heart leaps,
pulsing so fast to the loud hums and taps;
it can't take the rush.

My jaw locks, a warm, twangy bite;
with my eyes so wide, I'd gasp,
but my breath hides, trapped behind,
and no amount of gulps can free me.

I listen to the songs they sing,
about the peace and the love,
about unity and compassion.
I stop,
and I hear nothing.
Why do you think they're always in my ears?
I keep them near to me.
artists are truly born somewhere other than earth,
they pass by on shooting stars
belting out their messages so sincere.
but does it actually hit earth,
or does it just turn to dust in the sky?

I'm not gonna be another hit & run,
another ball hit in your game
but baby if you want to play
I'll play for sure
Tired of being hurt
and others being there too
You aren't gonna "get with me"
like your friends told you to
I'm not these other girls,
that you tricked
honey I've been here and dealt with it a thousand times
Don't think I don't know
Your friends tell me all that you say
and god forbid you say you didn't

It’s been a long time

since the book in my hands

had a cracked spine.

And it’s been a long time,

since my hands traveled

the distance along yours.

Im sorry I don't make sense all the time.
Sometimes I get lost in flashbacks or daydreams.
I kind of prefer being anywhere but in my own mind.
Sorry if that makes me hard to understand.
People aren't used to my unusually honest rambles.